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Hi! I agree with KSeers - fear intensifies the pain, and the best way to control this is to inform yourself. Find out if there are any antenatal classes in your area - ask your midwife or other mums you know. Also there are some good Yahoo groups. Find some mums, on or offline, who have had good experiences, and listen to their tales, as it will build your confidence. Try not to listen to the ones that went wrong! Remember, women have been giving birth for thousands of years, so you should be able to do it. If anything doesnt go according to plan, at least you have medical science to help you out. I got through it twice with just TENS and entonox, and being upright as much as possible. I was amazed that my MIL got through 3 births without any pain relief at all. Not everyone needs an epidural! For me, Im used to migraine pain. One of the things that kept me focussed through my first labour was that this was productive pain, unlike migraines - I was going to meet my baby at last!

Hey Dannii.  Being scared (while natural and understandable) will only make things worse.  To take away my fear I read as much as possible about people's actual experiences, as I figured if all these other women could then I could too! 

I made sure I understood the whole process and what would happen, but also why things happened, so I could reassure myself as things were moving - to know that this is something your body was created to do and it knows how to do it.

I also read up on active birthing techniques and I invested in a Calm Birth course.  What all that means is keeping upright and moving during the birth - finding positions that are comfortable, using water and natural pain relief.  Also, using breathing to keep calm and using meditation to focus the mind away from any pain. 

When my 2nd child was born I welcomed the contractions as it meant we would meet soon, I kept calm and did all the right things (as far as they would let me).  I managed to make it through a very painful delivery (VBAC, lying down, 40 hrs etc...) with only a shot of pethidine mid way as I started to lose my cool.  I even regretted that as with the right coaching I am sure I could have stuck to it, but I just panicked when i realised how much longer it was going to take. 

Never think ahead - just deal with the moment, with joy, breathing and calm thoughts and you will get there.  Here is some articles I wrote on planning for the birth if that helps.  I wish you well - you'll be fine!