Christians and Relationships

Hi all,

I'm new to this group but am so happy to see Christians getting involved in the everpresent world of Cyberspace and supporting each other to boot!

I have been a christian since my mid teens (now in early 40's) and have had many positive uplifting relationships/friends along the way. One comes to mind as it has just recently come to a crossroad, let me explain - i have a christian pal who i have been friends with for over a decade, and although she has lots a great qualities,she has a argumentative,controling, childish side that has raised it's ugly head yet again and i'm at my wits end. I won't go into detail about the conflict but it was a reasonably small disagreement in my view and i openly apologised for my part in the conflict but she refuses to apologise to this day(conflict started 2 months ago). She refuses to apologise for being deceptive and then accused me of calling her a 'big fat liar' (which i never would, i did call her irresponsible though).

For 2 months she has refused to speak to me or acknowledge my existence, she will happily speak at length to my husband and children, but not me. I'm sorry but i find this kind of behaviour very childish considering she was the one to start the conflict in the first place.

I have recently left her a sms saying that her friendship means a lot to me and i will be waiting when she's ready to talk, but as time goes on i'm feeling less and less inclined to want to rekindle the friendship, i'm so tired of her games and abuse!

What should i do?

traceywestaway

 

if you see my latest blog, im not in a very good way, im angry, and bitter, and i really am about to burst. I want nothing more to tell my whole family what these people are really like but it wilol be me that looses my family,i need prayer for peace, forgiveness for being so nasty and thinking i hate her, i dont i just dont like her. I need prayer i can be civil, and more than anything, i need prayer that we can move island ASAP we find the funds, and the job. Thanks, i rteally appreciate it.

www.onlinechristianparents.com

Could someone please try to explain to me, why as Christians, are we so afraid to stand up for and say what we believe in?  I have just tried to answer a question in the general forum about batisms and Christianity and it strikes me that the rest of the world thinks that being a christian is to accept every one and everything, regardless.  Batisms are simply social events that require a lot of planning and social etiquette.  The point has long been lost.  Is it because we have no backbone and dilute our faith down to suite the rest of the world because we are too scared to be seen as different?  Muslims stick to what they believe in and have no problem telling others what they believe in.  Maybe there is a lesson in there for us.  God bless.

Please pray for me at the moment and I will request my prayer needs!!!!!!!!
Had coffee today with a friend who is loyal to me, her parents go to the same church as "The Ex"
Anyway turns out that HE has got the whole church praying for me to be healed from my breakdown and reconciled to him!
Why I am so sick of it, is not one person from the church has come to me and asked what my side is or what my prayer needs are!!!!!
Recently I bumped into a woman from the church and told her a few things, turns out she went back to the church and asked them to continue their prayers for my healing and our reconciliation!!!!!!!
I AM SO ANGRY RIGHT NOW!!!!
I COULD SHOUT, RANT AAARRRGGGHHHHH!!!!
What is wrong with these people?????
How dare they presume they know what is best for me when they haven't even been in touch with me ??
My boys are very hurt about the whole thing, this is the church that they call
"The Church that Hates My Mum "

My prayer needs are simple actually
Gods continued blessing on my sons and my daughter
Gods continued hand in me regaining my strength and my health
Gods continued blessing in his daily provision for us

And that God will help me to not let my heart go cold on all churches and christians alike
I have my faith but please Lord protect me from all these hypocrites

I'm sorry if this comes over as inoffensive or hard, I'm just really hurting about this whole thing
Thankyou
xxx

hey there!

just joined this group and wanted to say hi.   feel free to drop by my page if you want to know more about me and my family  

Its no secret that I have been badly hurt and let down by the church and lots of people I used to go to church with and call my closest friends.
Easy Solution for me recently...........
I GAVE UP ON CHURCH!!!!!
Now before you panic and pray for me,
Instead of looking to the church for support, I decided that ok the church isn't there for me but I know someone who is, so instead of going to the church every week and getting nothing out of it except uneasy looks or conversations, I have a one to one relationship with God and I have put my Faith in Him
Its been great for me, I really am seeing miracles.
The boys counsellor told me that I would get a small house/flat only 2 bedrooms so the boys would have to share, no garden and the possibility of having to get rid of lots of our things as we would have no room for it all.
I took this to God in prayer, I told him to find a home that we could love no matter how small, a home we could find peace, a home we could feel safe......and to make me thankful for whatever I received.
My HOME has 3 bedrooms, a garden and all the things I needed to have with me, fit perfectly. Yes it is half the size of my old house, but rather like a TARDIS, everything we need fits perfectly.

The boys who were getting very angry with God because of the way some of his people have treated their Mum are now beginning to see that if we rely on people, we will be let down, but if we rely on God, there is a whole new world for everyone.

hey my partner nd i were saved for about 7-8 monthsish, we went to the potters house church the pastor nd every 1 were really nice but then dat pastor went to perth nd we got another 1, he was horrible to us nd all other new saved ppl, well the pastor told me nd my partner that we sholdnt see each other for 6 months cos it will prove how much we love god etc, then get married, but that wold mean we cold basicly go out wif some 1 of the streets???, now i have been put off going too any chuches 4 like a year!! is all christians churches like this??

Hi. I have been a christian for nearly four years now. they way i came to christ was amazing. Miracles happened that most christains would die to see or have in there life. to start my story off i need to tell you a few things. i had a son to my partner who at left me when my son was 16 weeks old for anotther girl. i hit rock bottom pretty fast, the weekend he left me i pulled some guy off the street had a few drinks and slept wirth him. and basically that was my life for i think a year. i slept with whoever and whenever i didnt care. i was fat and ugly any attention i could get i was going to take it. i was a compulsive liar, drunk, druggy and S L U T. sorry if that word offends but there is no other way i know how to describe it. In the end it resulted in my trying to kill myself. I took a heck of a lot of pills and drank alot of alcohol. Then god spoke to me and told me i needed to ring an ambulance. My son was asleep in my room at just over a year old and ultimately it was him i was hurting. So i called an ambulance and got the required treatment. i settled down for a few weeks, and then my dad asked me to go to church as his birthday present. i hummed and harred for quite some time and eventually agreed. my brother was goiung to look after my son while i went to church. he hopped in the car with my son and realized he had a flat tyre. it got changed and off he went again only for us to get a phone call that one of his tyre popped and needed help. I tried to change my mind about going because obviously these were signs that i didnt belong! we eventually got there and there was this fantastic preacher called christine cain. when it came to the end of the sermon they asked anyone to go up to commit there lives to god and i felt god leading me up to the front. even to this day i insist i didnt know what i was doing it was like i had no control over my body i mean i hated christains. the next day my dad took my brothers tyres to get them fixed and there was nothing wrong with them YES you read right no holes no nothing. they were perfect and didnt even need pumping up. I moved house and tried to leave my old lifestyle behind, and a couplke of times old people found me and id slip. 

then i met my husband. he was sweet, caring, a godly man, who i knew was the one for me. He loved me despite my weight he loved my little boy.8 months after we met we married. he had some savings for our honeymoon and spent it all before our wedding day. He borrowed some mnoney off his friend (which he never told me about) about two grand. I though life was great. i fell pregnant on our honey moon and life was perfect.

Because money was so tight we shared a cellphone and i came across a message from his friend asking my husband for some repayment money. i questioned him and he swore that he didnt owe any money to him other than warrant money (this friend was borrowing hubbys car) so i accepted and left it. At four months pregnancy and marriage my mother shows up at home in a rage and is shoving her jewerly in our faces. i noticed hubbys face went white as a sheet and was so confused. Turned out Hubby stole my moms jewerlly and gave it to his friend to seel on the net to pay back the money. i forgave him and he spent a week in the spare room then we left it. he never had charges laid upon him.

6 months ago i come home to find private investigators going through my house. i asked my husband what they were doing hereand he said it was a mix up and all would be ok.i believd him. then a PI came up to me and asked what hubby had said. i told him. he said no hubby has been caught on camera stealing money from work. He stole a little over a grand. he spent a week living at my nans and two weeks in the spare room. he had five councilling sessions and gave up despite my pleas for him to keep going. only a month ago did he finished his court hearings etc. he got 40 hours community service.

Last week i was looking round the computer and found out he has had a porn addiction since we got the computer.  i kicked him out and he spent a week at a family friends. he has sinced moved into the sleepout of my home as he still wants access to the kids.

Today i found out that he used the stolen money for pornorgraphy amoung other things. we have had  miserable marrige really. but love was never the problem it is his lies and deciet. his adultary of the mind. this is a man i make love to, but yet has he been thinking about these girls? im so disgusted, and humiliated. i feel sick to my stomach. my self esteem is now non exsistant. i struggle to leave the safety of my home. im mad at my children for wanting my attention although i know  they need it. everyrime my heart starts so soften something comes up. i tried to delete these files with the picture on them so they wouldnt be on the computer anymore. but ended up accdently opening the pictures and all the same feelings resurface. everytime i close my eyes i picture him sitting at the computer getting himself off to those pictures.

PLEASE I NEED ALL THE PRAYERS AND SUPPORT AND ADVICE I CAN GET! my chest hurts literally and i cant seem to make it stop.

Hello all. I'm here in a slightly different capacity, but just as much in need of counsel. Last week I was completely blown away by a phone call from a good friend of mine, telling me she and her husband have separated. They have been married over 15 years and have two sons. Both are strong Christians, and active in ministry. I have known them from the very start, in fact I was present when they met. They are some of my oldest friends, and until this phone call I had no idea that anything whatsoever was amiss.

I am really floundering trying to come up with how to respond. I have spoken to both of them separately now, but really haven't asked any questions... I'm not sure I really want to know the answers. Is this just cowardice? What should I be doing/saying? I'm really lost.