I am so sorry for you and your friends.  I can understand how you feel about not asking questions, as I was in a similar position with friends of ours some years ago now.  The only bit of advice I can offer for if or when you get any information is that there are two sides to the story - and somewhere in the middle is the truth.  Keep an open mind and just be the loving friend, to both if you can, that you always have been.  God bless.

A big problem for me is all the people who all too quickly quote scripture. It's true, the scriptures are there to teach and inspire us, but it is also the measure of how we will be judged. So in this crisis, follow the second commandment given to us by Christ himself, love your neighbor as yourself. There is no reason to judge them based on their decision to seperate. They've decided for themselves that it is what they should do. Simply, and lovingly, remind them that although they may not share the same bed, they equally share responsibility for the lives they were entrusted with, their two sons.

I couldn't help relating your story to my own experience.  I - however - was on the other side and was one of the people going through a divorce.  One of the hardest and most hurtful things for me was that very few people - especially within the church - seemed to want to take time with me to ask what happened.  To find out the truth and then to base decisions on that.  Instead people assumed, they judged, they ignored and finally they rejected me. 

You probably need to have a think about why you don't want to know the answers to questions.  There may be some of your own stuff that you need to work through in order to be a supportive friend in this time of need.  It can be very confronting when your own ideals of people get shattered in a situation such as this, but just remember that people are human and we all have our flaws.  Noone is perfect and should not be expected to be.  They need to be loved now more than ever.  And I daresay that part of love is understanding the truth.  The verse that keeps echoing through my head is "You shall know the truth and the truth will set you free". 

I don't think there's any rule as to what you should be doing and saying.  Don't beat yourself up, but just know that however bad you're feeling, your friends are probably feeling much worse - or have been until recently - and they need your love and support.

Good luck!

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Its a really sad and difficult situation
All you can do really is be there for both of them but as a listening ear only
Its not cowardice at all
You are probably worried about how your loyalty to each will be seen
My friend decided to help and support both of us but got far too involved and in way too deep and over her head, now we are no longer friends because she ended up being very supportive to my Ex and he kept the side of himself that very few have seen well and trully hidden so she ended up starting to doubt what I was saying and I could no longer trust her, but then again my ex is extremely manipulative.
I agree with Jess
don't ask too many questions, say its hard because they are both your friends and you don't want to be seen as taking sides if it looks like that is starting to happen.
All the best
xxx

The less questions asked, the easier it will be for you to stay neutral and friends with them both... :)