I love my children so much, but they are not white! lol, I'm half Mexican and half German.  My babies are half Guatemalan, 1/4 Mexican, 1/4 German, yet the family calls them white!  I have nothing against that side of my family, infact it's my mom who is a "honkie", and I love her to death.  My in-laws always say how white they look, and I dont want them growing up thinking they are "white" but mixed, Latin and Eurpean!  Not to mention my neice, who is 100% Guatemalan looks more like a "white" girl then I do...I love my family, I just wish that they would say they are spanish too... :)

Being interacial often means having different traditions for the holidays.  For me christmas is now somewhat different with my in-laws, though still very wonderful.  How has your holidays changed for you?

What does it feel like when you are the parent and you feel left out because you are mixed?  Sometimes it does not matter, other times it can bring you down.  It's so important to have support from your family, I'm blessed that my in-laws all love me, as I love them and that they don't see me as being different.  My daughter is more latina then I am and it makes me proud to see how much she does not even know, though she is only 20 months :)  When she gets older, I know that she will learn that being mixed has no importance, just being a good person is what is important.

I am Aussie, hubby is Maori so we call the kids mozzies!
I hope the kids grow up proud of who they are, cos I sure am proud of them.
Hubby worries about them. He dealt with rascism growing up but it doesn't seem to be an issue so much. (He would say - spoken by a white!)
Most children in this area are inter racial and tbh I think it makes for beautiful children.

yes me again going on about Australia day. I started out at the lake for a swim with my two girls, everyone was there...mostly kiwis, mauris, islanders and of cause traditional aussie (polite way i guess) palagi's....yes that's me..

It was the most friendly happy atmosphere, everyone was so happy to be out and celebrating the day and to be a part of Aussie land whether citizen or not, everyone came out in the heat and had one awesome day.

If anyone is from Qld, Gold Coast/Bne - Evandale Park on the Gold Coast is the place to be on Australia Day. I think we are just in a great part of the world for mixed kids to be....it's part of our life here, everywhere you go there is a different race and everyone is friendly and happy...,my experience anyway..

When do you think it's a good time to introduce the different backgrounds of your child to your child?

Wanting to know who you are is something that all people go thru.  Wether it be your culture, creed, preferences, it's all apart of being happy with yourself.  I was never happy as a child being mixed.  Now I'm very proud, it took many painful years to come to love who I am.  I was never able to know my father, but my mom made sure I knew who I was.  I think it's so important to let you children know who they are.  If one parent or the other does not want to let them know where they came from, then the child can feel like they are not important.  I was only show the white side of my heritage so I became ashamed of being half mexican.  It was not until I meet my husband, who is Guatamalen, that I have learned to love that part of me too.  I think that if I was told as a child about my mexican side and that part was also nurtured, which was no fault of my moms, I would have though differently about myself all along.  Point is, just because you don't want to let them know who they are is no reason to not tell them.  If one parent does not want to tell the child part of their background, then they should ask themselves how would they feel if their parents didn't tell them about who they truely are.  I live in the USA and we pride ourselves on being a mixing bowl of color and cultures, but we should not be the only ones who should be proud of this.  The whole world should be proud!  Remember, we need to think of how our children would feel based on our disicions.  And ask your child if they want to know about their background.  If they are old enough, and you don't know what to do, let them make that desicion, but be supportive.  We are here to nuture them in every way, and to hide part of who they are is just like saying to them "I don't accept you and I'm ashamed of part of you."  I know it sounds cruewl, but that's how children view things when they don't know all of who they are. 

My daughter is a britisher, half kiwi and half african.  I have recently been found by the love of my life and we were talking last year about racism and how it affects children.  He said a few things I disagree with and I upset him by saying as much. 

He believes we should raise her in an awareness of her black heritage.  (I agree with that bit).  I said we should do equally with white, he said no.  (I disagree with that bit).  Maybe I am a bigotted white person - I sure hope not - I suffered terrible racism from the british while I was a teenager and it has made me really dislike that stance and until recently I have not noticed a person primarily for their colour.  To me colour and size are immaterial and often I cannot tell you if someone is fat or thin let alone black, white, green or brown.

Am I wrong to want E to be proud of who she is first, as a person with her own talents and abilities, then to be aware of her heritage after that?  I already give her african 'side' a lot of time being as I am the white half of her heritage so that she is comfortable with both.  Talking to my Dad over christmas, he said if anything I am overcompensating, but that as a single parent he cannot see how else to do it, and i am not being exclusive.  Should I be exclusive?  Should I put down her white heritage so taht she can cope with any bullying that may come her way?

I have known foreign people accuse me of making a racist comment for saying
'Hi how are ya mate?'
To me it is a greeting.  'Mate' being a cockney and southern hemisphere type of word I guess some people can take offense.....but accuse me of being racist?  Am I to deny myself and my own culture on the off chance that you may be offended, or am I true to myself?  Years ago I decided to be true to me, because when I pampered to peoples whims i got too confused...

Based on that I want my lovely confident daughter to maintain her ego, her perspective and her sense of self, to keep it healthy and be true to herself, not second guessing everyone who speaks to her for an insinuation that may or may not have a racist basis.  Am I wrong? 

I desperately need educating on what the right thing to do is.  We are in the UK at the moment, but if we move home or to the states or even to africa, then what are the cultural differences that I should bear in mind so that we can implement an awareness at least before we are bombarded with negativity. 

I know all of this is personal and subjective, but please try to be realistic so that I can implement things that are suggested instead of getting more confused.  I can only do my best for E, and my best is based on my personal perspective and experience, if i broaden my boundaries then I should be more aware.  Or should I just stuff it and expect others to step out of their narrow little lives?  I have pussyfooted around people for the past 18 years who are so parochial and their way is the only way....should I just disrespect them as they disrespect me?

Tempting, but doesnt really go with my personality.  LOL  Thanks for reading and all input will be muchly appreciated.
Peace
EF.x 

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