I was 15 weeks when I started spotting. Day on day off then just kept going, they put me into hospital and at 16 weeks my water broke. I was told the baby had a 3% chance to live and was told to abort. NO WAY. As long as my child has a heart beat, she has a chance. I was in and out of hospital from then until 23 weeks. The fluid kept leaking as it was unable to seal over so I had to keep and eye on the fluid and my temp. A day off 24 weeks I had green discharge and went straight to hospital, they gave me an ultrasound and informed me she had died.
I can't describe the feeling, but all of you on this site will knwo what it feels like. I had 2 boys, and to have to give birth to a baby that you knew would never cry is so gut wrenching.
My frustration is all the people around you who think they are helping by saying its okay you're young enough to have more, or at least you have 2 healthy boys at home. I'm sorry but is that suppose to make it better. NOT.
Anyway, since losing my little girl I have had an ectopic pregnancyc losing my right side, then a 9 week misscarriage, and only last Nov another ectopic pregnancy. Yes I have 5 healthy boys, but still I have lost babies, my babues 4 times. You never get over it. Sure the pain gets a little less but you never truly get over the death of your child. |