I am never dressed, showered and made up before 9 am. And if I am I look like something out of a horror movie.
Never eat a hot meal. By the time I get everyone else fed, the food is cold.
I rarely use the bathroom without an audience, no matter the time of month (they are expert locksmiths just a spoon or knife is all it takes to unlock the door). forever finding the feminine products around the house being used to create interesting construction projects.
I Pretend that I am deaf when I hear “she pinched me” or “he's teasing me". Unless there are blood-curdling screams or actual blood, I know not to get involved. Oh and lets not forget the little peoples finger art on the toilet wall, charming.
I Never have an uninterrupted conversation period unless I am far away from the children.
Stretch marks...let's not even go there.
Did I mention I used to shower?
But I know that no matter what happens, these crazy days will all be a memory one day and I will end up longing for these days to return.
Most importantly....I Try not to take things too seriously because things could be a lot worse
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