Received the dreaded phone call last night at about 7.15pm ish.

I had gone to my daughter Sharon's house to baby sit the babies, 3 and 2  while Mum and Dad went out to a 50th, Sharon and Matthew never go out, so a great oportunity for them, and for me to spend quality time with the babies.

Sharon and Matthew had basically just left the house and the phone rang, it was Christine, my neice, the one in Dampier with my sister Marion. Obviously she had rung here and my hubby had given her Sharon's number.

THE PAIN I FELT IS INDESCRIBABLE.

I rang Matthew's mobile and gave him the option of letting Sharon enjoy the night, the good boy told her and she came straight home, while I was on the phone to my other daughter, Michelle, the one in Queensland, so we had a "group hug" and a good cry, then I rang home straight away, my hubby, Tony was in tears, my Nicholas was in tears, my Anthony was in shock. He had only been home about 24 hours from seeing her, he knew she was bad but didn't want to accept it.

After a cry with the boys, I rang my other sister in Adelaide, for an hour we cried, we laughed, we remembered, cried some more, then started remembering family we had not even thought about telling. Mum is the oldest of 14, so we have a lot of family! spread all over the country.

Tonorrow (later today) Sharon is going to come here and we are going to go through the photos, there will be tears and lots of remembers.

We are also aranging for Michelle and her baby to come home for the funeral which will be in S A , thank you to Marion's husband.

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, EVERY ONE GET THE VACCINE FOR CERVICAL CANCER, AND, VACCINATE YOUR DAUGHTERS.

AND GET YOUR SMEAR TEST DONE REGULARLY

Hopefully this cruel waste of life can be eradicated.

Marion never had children which is very sad for us as we know what a fantastic mother she would have been.

You all know that pink ribbon is for brest cancer, white is for domestic violence, red is for AIDS.          I beleive that purple is for cervical cancer, I would love for every one to wear a purple ribbon on march 5th which would have been Marion's 57th birthday. I plan on making some for her funeral to give to every body. I need to do something, I feel so empty right now.

I sincerley thank every one that has left me messages of love and support, I am relying on you all to help me through this sad time.

It has ben raining for the last 3 days.

I went to visit ny daughter last night and had to stay over night, it was raining Tigers and Rottweilers not cats and dogs. I did the usual, rang my sister to say good night but she was asleep so chatted with my neice then Sharon had a chat to Christine.

When I got home I rang Marion to say good morning but she was asleep again, so chatted with Christine again, Marion is failing fast.

Making loads of phone calls to let every one know, even her former husband whom has remained friends with her and the hubby now, can't get hold of him at all, just leaving messages for him to call.

Yesterday I received the most horific news.

My sister is dying, she has end stage cancer with renal failure.

It started a year ago, I received an email telling me she is in hospital having a blood transfusion. She is bleeding heavily every 28days, both she and I wrongly assumed it was her period. It was cervical cancer. Off to Perth to get treatment, all sorts of tests and scans, yippppeeeee no secondarys. Start radiation and cemotherapy, every day for 3 months, get the all clear, go home. I get information that she is back in hospital back in Perth over christmas, BUT DON"T WORRY, I am told. I send my son over to Dampier to visit them on 27th december, he is to have his 18th birthday with them. Then Marion is in hospital in Karatha in pain, a catheter is put in because she can't wee. Has an appointment in the Perth hospital in feburary to see her specialist. A phone call from her husband starts the process, with him telling me that he thinks the cancer is back.

Yesterday I received a call from the Karatha hospital telling me that she is in endstage with renal failure and they are "keeping her comfortable" She couldn't even have survived the flight to Perth.

Now I have to tell all my family, my Tony is in tears which scares me, my Nicholas is stunned, Sharon (Pagan mother of 3) is devestated, my daughter in Queensland is in shock, I have spoken to my Anthony, he is in tears and wants to come home and I want him home. He will be here tomorrow.

Why am I not there you ask, well I live in Whyalla, South Australia and they are in Dampier, Western Australia. By the time I get there it will be all over.

I am grateful to her husband, the funeral will be in South Australia. At least she will be with Mum, Dad and our Big Brother, our Little Brother is in Alice Springs, and heaps of other relatives, our Nana is there and a few uncles and aunts some cousins as well.

I have spoken to her on the phone and told her how much I love her and that I will miss her so much. I will ring every day and damn the expence.

I can't beleive the pain.

My advice is, LOVE the ones you have because life is so short, even if you are arguing, make up, because you may loose them sooner than you think.

3rd January ALREADY, where has the year gone??

We had a super fantastic christmas. We bought our 2 boys a computer each, planned for it, saved for it and did it.  Took us all year to save the quite a bit of money for 2 computers and save for our oldest son to go to Western Australia to visit my sister and family BUT WE DID IT, We gave tha boys their computers on christmas eve because Anthony was going on his holiday on 27th and Nicholas was going to Adelaide for 2 weeks on 29th. Plus they had their christmas stockings and a few other gifts to open. YES there is only hubby and I at home, first time EVER in 21years, now we have to learn how to talk to each other all over again, bit like a honeymoon Great fun time had by all.

New year was very quiet, we went out to our local football club, had a few drinks, a dance, all by my self as hubby does not dance, a few more drinks, well you all know how it is !!! stummbled home about 3am, luckily we live about 120 steps away from the club so we walked there and 2 steps foreward 1 step back and a sideways one or 2 on the way home. Yes we had a great time.

Let me tell you, I do not like sleeping in the house on my own, hubby had 2 night shifts to do so I had to be in the house all ALONE, ALL NIGHT. Did not get much sleep at all. tonight will be ok, he has 4 days off.

that's all for today. more later.