Hi all well it has been a long couple of months for me i had my hysterectomy and Caydn finally has an aide at school for 3 hours each day so i am happy about that. I was starting tyo wonder if he would ever get one. He is going well at schjool now and walks with the older siblings to school each day.  I am well now and have to now start getting all sorts of things for Caydn to help him along his huge jpurney of life. He will need alot of help and support not only from me but from his peers and siblings as well. He will be getting funding through the helping children with Autism package through the government so will have to get off my butt to get it all hapening for him so he does not get left behind.

Hugs Michelle

Hi all well i hope everyone has had a great new year so far. I have been busy trying to get the education system to approve a aide for Caydn whom has now been diagnosed as  having high functioning Autism and Aspergers which basically is the same a sthe prior. It has been hard since he started school On Monday each day i have taken him he has done nothing but scream when i leave him and yes it really hurts me inside. The other morning after dropping him off ay school i came hime in tears first time that week. I know he is going to be ok when i leave him and does settle down but it is the fact that i feel guilty about it. He is doing ok and has already bought home readers to start learning to read and is tryin his hardest to sound letters out. I had to go to a physchologist for him to get his autism confirmed althogh his peadiatrician had already said this is what he had. But seems that his peadiatricians word means nothing to the education department when it comes to special needs children. Caydn also has oppositional behaviuor which sme days is realy hard to deal with as no matter what i or anyone else says to him he will keep doing what ever it may be or saying. At times he can also be just sitting in the lounge an all of a sudden he will swear for no particular reason at all. I first thought that the others were annoying him but no one at these times is anywhere near him, jokingly i said to a friend thats all i need a 5 year old with tyretts! I am doing ok and am on the waiting list to have a hysterectomy by the end of march as i am classed as catergory 2. Just before Christmas i also went to see a plastic surgeon in regards to having a tummy tuck under the publis system as i have had 2 c_ sections and therefore qualify for it under that guideline. So i have an appointment in March to see  the plastic surgeons at the public hospital to see how long the wait time may be and if i am able to have it done, i have tole friends and family i am not worried how long it takes i want to get it done to feel better about myself as i am sick of people asking me if i am pregnant and when i am due. GGGGGGRRRRRR It really gets me down especially snce i suffer depression and everything else. Well thats about it for me i will post some pics of caydns first day at school as soon as i put them on my puta. They are all so cute i got pics with all the school age and Jaya had to get in them too.

I will try and blog for my friends whenever i am able to as i have been so down and last night did actually think about suicide but thought against it because of my family and friends they all need me around..

Hugs to you all

Michelle xxx ooo

I JUST WANT TO WOSH ALL MY TRUE FRIENDS A VERY MERRY XMAS AND A SAFE AND HAPPY NEW YEAR.

HUGS mICHELLE

I really do not care that my last blog was reported i did not name anyone within it at all. Someone is trying to make a mountain out of a molehill!! If people do something wrong by saying things that are not true then i believe their friends should also be aware of what they are capable of. It was a minti ,mail sent to me and i have every right to post my mail in a blog as long as i do not mention members names which i didnt! So al of you who wish i was not here and think i am trying to cause trouble you all need to get a life. All i wanted to get across in my blog that again was deleted by the very same person that reports all of my blogs they do not like was that we all need to be carefull what we say and whom we say it to and tell the truth what does lying get you??? NOTHING!!!!!!!!!

I am not on much so really do not care what anyone thinks and some i thought were friends i have since found out are not the people they seem to be...

So go ahead if  you want and report this blog but there is nothing that i wrote that i can see be reported for any reason.

I am not sending spam mail either for member whom stated i should be reported for sending spam mail..... I am merely doing this so that certain members are welcome to join the site. There are alot who already have and what emails i send is no ones business thought minti mail was private???!!!!! Guess it is not that private as admin say it is. If it was then  only myself admin and the member who forwarded it to admin should know about it.. As i was told they wish the person well in their endevour and they are going great guns new members every day!!!

The site is family friendly and has lots of other stuff minti does not have and how lomg has minti been running??

If you have a problem with me then  please minti mail me rather than slander me behind my back!! I have nothing to hide

Hi all well it has been a funny week so far for me. The kids are in school holidays and are trying very hard to keep themselves busy as they can. They have been normal kids fighting and arguing over the smallest of thimgs as kids do at times. Other times they have been very good and co operating with me. They have been helping around the house by doing chores for which i pay them a little bit of money for their money boxes. The younger two are thouroughly enjoying their new day care after al the hassles of their old day carer and what happened. I will not go into detail about it here as i do not think it is the right place for it. I am going well and have t go to court next Tuesday in regards to a family matter you could say. I have been trying to stay home a bit as my anxiety has hit a high note at the moment so home is the best place for me. Tomorrow i have to travel outside of my safety zone and take Tiffany to the dental hospital in the city so that should be fun not!!!!!! I do not cope too well with going outside my safety zone. I can go certain places but it needs t be within my safety area.

Tonight i only have the two teenagers and the younger two as the other 4 school age are at friends of mine places for a couple of days to give me a bit of a break. One of them is an older friend of mine and she lives on her own so she is happy to have the boys as company and they were lookng frward t it too. The other two are at Brookes for a night or two(pudgygirl06) they are helping her oack as she is moving to a new house closer to me yay yay she will only be about 4minute drive from me if that when she moves on the weekend. So i am going over there durng the week to help her pack and clean the help her move n the weekend as well. She is s excited about moving in a way as she only found out today that she gt one f the house s she applied for. It will be really good for her to be closer to me as she really is a fantastic person Kelz can vouch for that!

Well today i went to see my psycologist  after a few months. He wrote me a really good letter fr court next week and even gave me a ame for part of my problems well not really problems my depression and behaviours. One is paranoid personallity doisorder and then also many other personality traits as well so now i am a bt happier having a bit more insight into what is goimng on nin my head ol ol ol lol

Well that is all for now i am getting a bit tired will blog soon!

HUgs to all  xxx ooo

Hi all well it has been a while since i did a blog. I have been so very busy with all the appointments with Caydn and also Jaya now. School holidays are here now and it is going to be very interesting as my children no longer go to family day care. The younger two go to a brand new child care centre close to home and they are loving it there. They only started there on Monday this week and already Caydn is showing his true self to them. Behaviour wise i mean. He has started hiding under tables and throwing chairs that is just him i did pre warn them before he started, so they were aware of what his antics were and hopw he acan get at times. Jaya had an eye test the other day and she now also needs glasses to wear and she needs them on all the time. I do not pick them up until Friday she looks so cute in them as when we tried them on she wanted to take them there and then but i told her they had to get fixed for her first. She was happy with this. The frame is pink and purple pattern and really suits her to a tea. My eldest daughter is also expecting again some time next year she is due not sure when as yet. I am so excited at the moment as they may be coming down for xmas this year. It will be the first xmas i get to haver my grand daughter around for. I really hope that they do make it down as this xmas will be extra special with them here to celebrate.

The kids are all going well and there have been dramas in their lives the last month or so but i will not go into it here. My very close friends know what has been havppening and they have been very supportive.

The other day i had a really bad day i was that tired i slept for 14 hours straight lucky i had a friend here that stayed the noight and she was the one who told me to go to bed and get some sleep apparently i looked like i had not slept in weeks. One minute i was not too bad the next i was out cold as soon as i hity the pillow. I woke up the next morning at 6.30am feeling a bit better than the day before and today i had a relaxing day at home with the kids. We sat and watched movies all dasy and they enjoyed the quality time together. There was no fighting or arguing betweenh them at all until later in the day when they were all getting tired.

I cooked tea while they sat on my berd and watched dora with Jaya as she has now got a thing with dora it does not matter how small a picture of dora is she will find it guaranteed. and she needs glasses??? lol lol I know it is not funny about her wearing glasses but to be able to see dora in a small picture is amazing for her age. Jaya has grown so much in the last few montrhs she is talking heaps and is very clear with her speech too. Her and Caydn are like two peas in a pod where one goes the other goes and Caydn stands up for her if the others annoy her. She know s that she can do just about anything to him ans he will stand there and take it but if someone else does it he goes off his head big time.

The last month has been very difficult with everything happening all at once but i admit i have had my bad days and my good days. Myself and my family are strong and can handle anything that is thrown our way we have been here for each other through tough times and good times too. Friends are also being a great help being there if i need to talk about anything and even just for a chat.

I want to thank my dear friends for everything they have done to help me in the last few weeks.

Hugs Michelle xxx ooo

Well i have been so busy taking Caydn to appointments with o.t, speech therapist and many more that i have not had time to blog or even scratch myself. On Friday a friend of mine Brooke went to Tasmania to meet Alana and stayed tyhere fpor the weekend as she needed a break i am so grateful to Alana for helping her as she does not know her and was really good about it all. So i dropped Brooke of at the airport on Fridfay noight with one message have fun and give Alana a big hug from me. I pohoned to see that she had arrived safely as she had never been in an airoplane before but she said she did ok and had arrived and was already having fun. I was so jealous as i wanted to go with her but was unable to find someone to look after my children for the 4 days that iBrooke went for. So i came home with the kids and my phone was running red hot so i told the kids to tell anyone who called for me to say i had gone to Tasmania lol lol pmsl, the phone ran red hot all night. As Alana had not said whom was going to visit her and everyone thought it was mer so i went along with it loll lol everyone was sure it was me going to visit Alana so for those of you who rang it wasnt me!

So i had a quiet night Friday noght with the kids and then on Saturday i thought to myslef stuff this and rang the kids dad to ask him if he would mind coming over and looking after the kids for the night so i could surprise Alana and fly there lol lol i am sneaky. So we rang Alana and told her that Brookes brother was going to bew flying into wynard not sure if that is how it is spelt airport on a cesna with a friend of mnine as he had been in a bot of trouble and was gfoing to stay with his mum who hjas just moved to Tasmania. Alana said that would be fine so the arrangements had been made for this.

Sunday morning camne and i got dropped off to a friends place as the kids dad was taking them all to the snow and i was flying to tassie on a small secna with a f4riend to surpise alana when she arrived she would be expecting brookes brither lol lol

So i get there and Alana and Brooke looked really shocked i am sure the whole of the tiny airport heasrd me and trhey did too lol lol I was very loud and did shout out surprise its me the crazy one pmsl. Alana did not know what to do. So we get back to Alanas place and she is still cursing me for surprising her and every one else cos Brooke did not even know wthat i was going there lol lol even more of a surprise. I had so much fun we went sightseeing for a little bit and then went back home to enjoy a lovely roast tea that alana had prepared for us. It was the vbest roast i had eaten in ages apoart from my own loll ol

So Monday morning we leave Aklanas to get to the airport to come home Alana was not reaLLY WANting us to go but we had to get back. Even though i only stayed for a night it felt like a week.

Alana and her family are so very special and a laugh and joker too. We had plenty of laughs and our stomachs were that sore we were still aching whe we got to the airport lol lol

So we flew home and came back to reality. Brooke had so much fun she went to marlets and saw lots of lovely waterfalls as well. i managed to get afew pics which i will put up when i put on my computer. I am planning on going back there soon for a few days so i can spend a bit more time with Alana and her family.

Therre is someone i thought was a friend of mine tnat i have not spoken to or heard from in months that i have just found out from some of my friends that has been backstabbing me and saying that i do not have care of my children since they are in Family day care a couple of days a week. I would like this so called friend to live my life even for a week to see exactly what it is like to be a single mum suffering depression and having no family support and the kids daqd only coming around once in a while. This per5son has a husband and only hads a couple of children to look after. I keep my house clean  my kids are fed i do not whinge ata ll about my kife and i i always say to people everyone lives their lives differently and no one should judge what p[eople decide to do with their children under no circumstances. This frien did also have her children in day care at one stage but i guess that is ok for them but not for me. This person whom i thought was a friend i have helped out a couple of times and asked for nothing in return. i only ask that my friends be there if i need a little support or just for a chat and laugh even. I never ask my friends late at night to come and look after my children if an emergency should arise i deal with it my way on my own. This so called friend once told me that she does not like backstabing people or people who backstab others but yet i find out that she is doing exactly these things that she says she does not like. At least have the courage to tell me tomy face what you have to say not behind my back. To this i say they are nothing but guttless and i do not need friends like this in my life that are going to try and bring me down with my deporession any further. Sorry but i had tohave this out  of my sysytem cos it is really pissing meoff at the that MOMENTsomeone i enjoyed as a friend could be this low and say these awful things about me.

Hugs to MYREAL FRIENDS!! XXX OOO

Hi all well today i finally received my certificate in the mail for my course i did cert 2 in business. Yay i finally achieved something in my life for me apart from my children lol lol. I was really excited as i only handed my last unit in on Tuesday morning at about 10am and my assessor rang me an hour later to let me know how proud she was of what i have achieved by finishing the course and of course looking after 8 children as well. There are some people whom enrolled in the course but sionce rerceiving their laptop have not completed any of the units at all. That to me is a waste as there may have been someone out there whom really wanted to do the course but could not get in as they were full and for people to use the government in this way is shocking to me. For what a laptop that is all they achievced and a free one at that. I myself am proud of my achievent i was behind due to being ill and having lots of appointments for Caydn etc... but i finally achieved what i set out to do, and this was to complete my course. I will be laminating my Certificate on the weekend and placing it up on the wall for all to see. I am at the moment feeling really good about myself and receiving this in the mail today just boosted my confidence heaps. I woke at 6am feeling pretty ordinary as i have bronchitis stil and getting over it slowly if only i was able to rest i am sure it would totally disappear. Rest in my house not easy.

Caydn has o.t again tomorrow afternoon so i am hoping he is having a good day not a bad one like last time he would not co operate at all when doing some of the things the lady asked him to i ended up helping her by rolling the ball to him while she held his arms as he does not use his muscles to do things we realised so i am not sure how that will affect him when he starts school next year. Oh well we will deal wioth that when he gets there i guess. Today is Harleys 6th b"day i bought him a nintendo ds lite he is so totally excited and i have decided that this is what they will all get for their b"days this year Ashlee got one for hers last week then next month i have two b"days within 3 days of each other lol lol too close hey?? Oh well the two boys will get ds as well with a game just like Ashlee and Harley have got for theirs. They are really good with them as they have been sharing them with the others which is really greast so this way the others do not feel totally left out i bought the brain acadamy that was on the tv a while ago for ds this helps them with maths and other things as well so they have been sharing that around too,.the kids have been really good lately apart from yesterday morning when Harley and Tyson were fighting before school and Harley bit Tyson right on the cheek now Tyson has a massive bruise on his cheek that it looks like someone has punched him so Harley got into big trouble for that. I think he made up for it with Tyson today by allowing him to have first turn at his new ds. They were great so i am proud of my children every day as they are all learning to share and not be greedy.

I sdtill have a sore back and will be trying to go to the drs on the weekend to find out the results of my ct scan that i had over a week ago as last time i went they were not there so they should be there now i would say. I have not heard yet when Caydn has to have his mri but i hope it is not too long as i worry a bit too much sometimes i think, He is just a darling child always wanting cuddles lately and getting really close to certain peoiple. Jaya has been really good woith her toilet training too she went just over a week nopw and no accidents in her knickers until today at day care she had an accident so i hope she has not gone backwards but i am sure it will be a one of well at least i hope so.

Well i went bargain shopping tonight with a friend and i bought a $60 dollar pair of boots for $12 they were reduced then had 20% off the marked price as well so that was a fantastic bargaiun i also got a denim skirt marked $7 for $5.25 what a bargain they were. My friend also got the same skirt and she bought a really nice top that was originally $26 for only $5.25 as it was marked down to $7 then had percenatge off as well so we werte laughing all the way home at what we got our thinngs for. Sometimes it pays to go shoipping without kids as we can look better for what we want and actually buy for ourselves for a change not the kids as we always do. So i will be going shopping next week again when i get more money to grab bargains if there are any left.

Well ibetter get going now as itis getting late i wil promise to put pics of kitchen up soon as i transfer them to my laptop as this cpomputer is the kids one and for some reason will not allow me to put my pics up in here at al.

I hope everyone is having a great week and are staying healthy and having fun.

Hugs Michelle

Hi all well i am sorry i have not been around lately i am sick again second time in less than a month and here i was thinking i never get sick well it got me again. So i am on prednisilone and antibiotics again for 5 days. The dr told me i have to try and stay inside out pof the cold where possible and to rest as much as i can so today i did what i had to do and then had a cat nap before taking Caydn to kinder.

Well today i woke up at 6 am to get showered and ready before kids got up to get ready for school. Caydn  had speech therapy this morning he started off co operating but then got distracted and annoyed with it all so would not continue so we had to play catch with him then do some more then played throw aeroplanes in tub then do some more of the testing she was doing on him and then we ended up ending the session as he was getting really bad and would not so anythinhg he was told i think he was bored with it all as when he does no=ot like doing something for a long period of time he will play up and not co operate. So he has another session next week to finish the testing he started to day. Came home and a friend was here to visit  we just chatted and sat with the kids and watched tv i had a nanna nap as i am so worn out my friend was really good she woke me at 12.55 as Caydn had kinder at 1. Her daughter who has just turned 2 was asleep on my lounge room floor so cute.

So took Caydn to kinder came home and sat and did nothing at all as i had done all my housework. Picked Caydn up at 4 then had to drop him off to day carer as him and Jaya stay there tonight for the night and i collect them at 2pm tomorrow.

I am not seeing my physc till next Tuesday as he wanted to see how i am going over three weeks rather than two weeks. I am doing ok at times but have alot of stress at the moment with wondering what is going to happen when i have to go to court in October. But i am not going to lket that be the end of me no way no chance.

My mum is coming over on Saturday with a friend of mine and hers that has custody of her great grand children and they are bringing the youngest with them as the other two are at their dads for the weekend.

I have finished my course and think i may go and drop my last assessment of tomorrow so it can be sighted and then they will send it back with my certificate yay. I cannot believ i have finally achieved something good on my own without someone telling me to do it or being made to do something ido not want to do it really does feel good i can hanestly say.

Tiffany brought home a certificate from school the other day in recognition of her continued respect of the  school policy and what the school aspects and policies mean to them all. I was almost in tears so i told her that she was to be congratulated for that as it is not every day you get this recognition from the school.

Well ibetter get going watching big brother need to see who wins this one as this is the finale tonight. Ben just got evicted yay i do not lke him.

Well good night all and i will blog soon and i will put pics of my new kitchen soon as my other computer is getting fixed again and the pics are on that one. Hugs

Michelle and Family xxx ooo

Hi all well they pulled my old kitchen out on Tuesday so i have not had a stove or anything to cook meals. They placed the new kitchen in yesterday and i went up street to buy stuff for tea as we were going to have meat and vegies. But that was not meant to be the case last night as when i came back home from shopping the stove was not in and the workmen are supposed to be here today who knows what time to put it in. Spo we had to have take away again last nigth it cost heaps to feed us all. I am seriuosly hoping they do come back today to put it in as so far i have heard nothing from them and yesterday morning they were here by 8am to do kitchen. I wonder if they just want me to stress wether i will have a finished kitchen today as we were having jokes all day yesterday lol lol lol.

Well i went to the drs the other night as i had had enough of the pain in my back and right down my legs i have put up with it for 2 weeks now so enough waas enough. The dr gave me strong pain killers as i was unable to even sweep m,y floors or fold washing out of the dryer that is how bad the pain was, it was there constantly he also has me on anti imflamorty (?spelt wrong i think) tablets and yesterday i had to go and have a c.t scan on my spine and left hip as i have osteoarthritis in left hip so that may be flaring up due to the cold weather we are haviong here.

My friend is coming over today and we are hopefully going to go up the street to look at what we cannot afford to buy lol lol. I got Ashlee her b"day present yesterday as oiit was her b"day Monday but i did not get paid until yesterday myself and a friend went half half in a Nintendo DS for her with a game and a case with ear phones, two cases for games when not in use and a lanyard type thing. It only cost $229 for the lot and total value if bought individualy would be around $300. So we got a bargain and a half. We have decioded that this is what we will be doing for all of my kids b"days this year . Some people are telling me i am silly buying them as they think they are all too young for them and will not appreciate them at all. How can children learn to appreciate things bought if we do not give them a chance to show that they can look after things and not wreck them?? I am even going to get Caydn one for his 5th b"day as he has the mild autism and i think it wil be good for him to keep his brain thinking while playiong games. Do you think he is too young??

Well better go and find something to do before they decide to get here and do the rest of the klitchen.

WQill put pics up soon

Have a great day

Hugs Michelle