Hi everyone. Sorry i have not been on for a while i have been bust enjoying the kids. I have also been busy doing my course and really enjoying it as well. I never thought i would enjoy doing it but amazingly i am.

I will start from Boxing Day with my blog. We stayed at home and enjoyed watching dvds and the kids had a good day. I am happy as the kids have been pretty good considering the weather and all.

The last week has been really busy and i am going to be busy for the next couple of weeks. Tonight i am having a few friends over for drinks to celebrate the new year as i usually do that is if i make it lol lol. Thursday i have booked my van in to get registered  i cant wait as i will have my independance back again. I wont have to borrow Bills car anymore and i will be able to fit all the kids in and take them places rather than sit at home all the time. Friday i have my Family Support worker coming again she has been such a great help the last couple of months with writing letters for the Ministry to get things done that should have been done ages ago.

Tiffany had a friend over last night and they both slept out under the stars in the tent and they did not get much sleep. The both of them were talking,jumping on the trampoline,watching dvds on my laptop and just having fun. They came inside at about 7.00am this morning and Tiffany fell asleep on the floor and her friend fell asleep on the couch until i told them to go and get in Alicias' bed as she had gone to work. They both slept and have only just gotten up refreshed for the afternoon heat wave. I have my airconditioner going flat out today as it is meant to get to about 41degrees here. The house is shut up and dark just the way i lke it on a hot day. We were going to go to the beach but i think it will be too hot  for the kids in the sun so we will be watching tv all day. Thank goodness for Foxtel!

Last night Caydn was playing with scissors and cut his finger it would not stop bleeding for about half an hour but with pressure and bandaids on it, it did eventually stop. I thought it was deep but looking at it this morning it is not as deep as it looked ;last night. Jaya was also sick last night. She had her bottle of milk as normal and had gone to sleep. Jaya had been asleep for about an hour or so when her dad yelled out ot me. I ran into the room and she had vomited everywhere in her cot. So i had to shower her and strip her cot. I washed her sheets and other bedding straight away so that it did not smell by morning. Jaya showered then she sat on the couch with me for a while before going to lie on the bed with her dad. She is rreally a daddys' girl. I am trying to take her dummy of her but her dad keeps giving it back ggggrrrrr males. He wants to keep her as a baby but it will not happen lol lol. She is growing so fast. Jaya is ok this morning just a bit whingy and fell asleep again at about 10am. She had only been up for about 3 hours before going back to sleep. The other kids are all playing blocks or watching tv. I am just sitting here doing my blog.

I just wanted to let you all know you are in my thoughts each day and i hope you all have a great new year!

I hope no one has a big hangover tomorrow morning! lol lol

Have a great night and enjoy the new year! Hugs Michelle xxx ooo

Well i was woken by the children at 5.30am this morning gggrrrrr kids! I got up sat with the kids for a bit then had my shower as we all needed to wait for the others to wake up. Showered got ready for the morning which was fun at first. All other kids woke up about 7.30am they were tired still but the ones that were awake woke them while i was in the shower. Kids all opened their presents from santa they loved this part. Jaya was so funny she wanted everyone elses presents but not her own lol. The kids got a scooter to share etween them well Cody turned around and said:That should be mne as i asked for one!" I was not at all impressed how could he be so selfish on Christmas morning?. Oh well all the others were grateful for what they got off santa. Tyson got a new bike,Harley a little organ, Caydn remote control car(as did other 3 boys), Ashlee got a big barbie style car with amotor bike on it,They alll received games to share and a v-smile paint thing that conects to their v-smile They just love this. Jaya received a cleaning trolley and clothes as did the others. They all received clothes. j and Tiffany got new mobile phones they luv them.

I was happy this morning but as the day has gone on i am hating everything. I feel like i am going to lose the plot. Caydn at the moment is throwing a major tantrum as Bj went to shop for garbage bags and i told Caydn he could not go. I just want to run away right now. I have had enough of the fighting and arguing between them all, it is worse than any other day. I have started organising our chicken for tea tonight we are having a roast yummy. I hope everyone is having a great day and enjoy this happy time. I wish all children the best and hope thsat they received their xmas wishes from santa.

Well i better go back to the crew i think before too long i may just go out to be by myself i cannot handle all this today.

The kids dad is here but he was not even up when they opened their presents as he got drunk last night and started annoying me. Today he has not even spoken a word. Oh well i really do not care today for anything especially him and his crap. If he keeps going i will tell him where to go and never come back. Myself and the kids are better off without him around. We are so used to it as just about every xmas he has been in jail or somewhere else. So i think he does not really care. As i sit here typing i have tears in my eyes just because today is a bad one.

Well now i have got that off my chest i must go and find something to do!!

Hugs to you all and havre a very happy xmas and have fun.

p.s I think i may need a drink!! lol That may make me feel a bit better!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY DAY!

HUGS ALWAYS MICHELLE XXX OOO

Yesterday was Jayas' second b'day she had heaps of fun and got spoilt as always. Myself and her 15yr old Brother B.J bought her a 6volt battery operated car it is so cute. The only problem is that the other boys got to it and have broken it so it is not going at the moment ggggrrrrr boys. Oh well she got lots of clothes a money box and a doll and pram from my mum. My mum came over and she gave the children their Xmas presents so they did not at all feel left out on Jayas' special day. They all got clothes from her. I had a small get together for Jaya with friends and Family. The kids all had a ball togethere and Jaya was wondering what was going on. I guess she is only 2 so does not fully understand yet what birthdays are. The kids went to their day carers for the night last night and i am going there tonight at about 6pm to have our christmas tea that we always have each year. The kids do not know as they have been asking wethere we are having tea at Jodys' tonight or not and we said no. lol lol They will be in for a surprise when i get there to pick them up and we stay for tea..

I woke up at 6.45 to a quiet house no i did not sleep in i wish lol lol. I got up and waited for a friend of mine to drop in for her morning coffee before she went to work. Her daughter and my 13 year old Tiffany are like best friends. She called in about 7.25am and the kettle was hot and ready for our warm cuppas to start the day. I had to go and wake Alicia up as she started a new job last Tuesday and had to be at work before 9am this morning. My friend goes past her wprk so was giving her a lift again as she did a few days last week. With Alicia gone to work i had my shower.. Oh so good to be wide awake. Tidied up a bit in the house while others were still sleeping. I had to go to the supermarket to get more wrapping paper and sticky tape so i could finish wrapping the christmas presents before tonight. Got what i needed and came home. Wrapped all the presents ready to be put out by santa tonight. They are all going to have so much fun tomorrow when they wake up. Jaya is getting a baby v-smile, the older ones are getting an art studio thing for their v-smile that they have and 2 game cartridges for it also. I have mainly ought items that they can all use that way i hope there will be no fighting kids they will have a whinge as always lol lol. Tyson is getting a new bike as his bike is broken so that will be one reason one of the other boys will have a whinge. I will be going to bed early tonight as i can guarantee they will all get up early.

I am sitting here doing some of my course work i am totally enjoying it. A friend of mine asked me today if i wanted to sell my laptop that i bought myself in July, I said No way that is mine. He said but you just got a new one i do not care i worked hard to get what i have. I told him i am not selling either of my computers. My new one is for my course and my other laptop is for my personal use when i want to use it. Some people just cant be happy for anyone but themselves. Why do people have to try and make me feel bad when i am feeling so great within myself at the moment????

Well for the remainder of the day i think i will just sit and try to relax and think of nothing but good things. The New Year is fast approaching and i am looking forward to it!

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A SAFE AND HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU ALL!

Hugs Michelle and Family xxx ooo

P.S Thank-You to Bel and Cazza for the birthday wishes for Jaya yesterday! It made it very special. Thank you and many higs to you and all my friends..

I will be of for a few days to spend the time with my kids enjoying the holiday time!!

Hi all i am still around just busy organizing xmas and Jayas' 2nd Birthday tomorrow. Our dog Tess is home from the vet now i brought her home yesterday afternoon. She is on antibiotics for the next few days and is only allowed to eat rice and chicken for now. I have to keep her inside for now just until she gets a bit better. She is getting spoilt heaps. Tomorrow Jaya is 2 i cant believe it 2 years has gone so fast. I am having a little get together for her with a couple of friends and family.. The kids are now on Holidays it will be stressful for the next few weeks while they are home as my depression has taken a bad turn. The Phychiatrist has given me two more lots of medication for my depression and anxiety. The ones i take at night with my normal anti deppressants knock me out for the whole night as i was not sleeping well, but now i am. Last night there were storms here and i slept right through them lol. My 17yr old had a couple in her bedroom with her. I felt horrible this morning when they told me but there was nothing i could do to hear them. I need sleep so i can function throughout the day. But on the other hand i also need to be there for the kids at night if they get scared for any reason. So do i stop meds or keep taking them??? I am not sure any more. I feel heaps better since i have been on these new meds. Better than i have felt in ages even months. I am going well with my course and also have a folder with work to teach me how to use office 2007. I know a little bit but not everything. I am actually really enjoying this course more than i thought i would. So now i must go and do something. Jaya is in bed having her afternoon sleep. She will sleeep for about 2hours. The rest of the kids are in their room making a cubby house out of their blankets and the bunks. They have great imaginations when they want to use it lol. Well ihope everyone enjoys their weekend and Xmas. I will try to blog tomorrow night and then i may not be able to get on again until after xmas as i will be flat out!

MERRY XMAS AND A SAFE AND HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU ALL!

HUGS ALWAYS MICHELLE AND FAMILY XXX OOO

Well my week started ok but is not going as well as i would lke it  to be! I had to rush one of our dogs to the vet yesterday and she is still in there. I have een ringing the vet daily sometimes twice a day to see how she is. The update this morning was good but when i rang them just after threepm, they told me she was vomiting again and passing blood as well. She is not on heat but is bleeding inside somewhere from an infection they say. They have her on a iv drip and are also giving her antibiotics. Tess (the dog) is slowly getting there but is not out of the woods just yet so i am just hoping she gets better soon. The last i heard the vet bill was up to $320 which i have to pay half and then i can pay the rest off over time. Being christmas and having Jayas B'day Sunday i am not going to be able to pay for it. I have told my Daughter that it is her dog so she needs to find the money to pay them, Not my responsibility. I went out at 8am this morning to pick up my christmas laybys. They cost ne about $500 yeah i am now finished lol lol! I am organizing a get together for Jaya on Sunday but nothing too much I cannot afford it this year at all. I made a promise to myslef earlier this year that the children would have a better christmas this year than they did last year. I have kept this promise to myself.. This time of year is hard for alot of us so i hope everyone has a good christmas and safe new year!

Some good news this afternoon i went to pick up my laptop for my course yay me! I am using it now to type my blog. I am currently up to unit 5 in the course way ahead of where i should be.

My day carer gets her new car tomorrow afternoon weeks after her accident i have not told the kids as yet as it will be a surprise for them tomorrow when she picks them up in the afternoon in it. I cant wait myslef to see it lol lol

EWell i better get going as i am really tired tonight i almst passed out about 4 times earlier. Think i am trying to do too much lately.

Hope you all have a good night and will blog tomorrow night to let you all know how Tess is going. I hope she comes home tomorrow!!

Have a great night slepp and enjoy the rest of the week.

Hugs Michelle xxx ooo

Hi all i have been busy organising christmas and Jayas b'day which is on Sunday. I will blog when i get the chance and visit lounges also. Sorry i will not be on as regular as i have been but i am flat out with it all. I hope everyone has a wonderful christmas and a safe and happy new year too!

I have to pick up laybys and go see my physchiatrist this week as well. He has put me on different medication for my depression. They seem to be working ok for now anyway! I have had my van in the shop and it is ready now to get registered thank goodness for that. I have been waiting ages for it. It has cost alot to get roadworthy and now i have the rego right near christmas gggrrrr. Well i better keep going just wanted to check in so all my friends know i am still around but bit busy!!

Again Merry christmas to you all! Hugs Michelle

Thursday woke up at 6am as always. Got kids organised for school and everything else so i could start my day... Day was good i just did the usual house work before i had y appointment with m physciatrist after lunch. Went to my appointment at 12.30pm. My physc has put me on more medication for my depression and to help me sleep better at night as i have not been sleeping properly waking up about 5 times a night then up at 6am everyday i am getting so tired and grumpy. So i hope these new meds work better as i have also been pretty angry and moody with everything for no actual reason. My depression is playing up ig time lately i just don not seem to have the energy or motivation to do most things. I think i only do the house work as i need to keep house clean. The older ones are not helping much either lately so that does not help at all. I went to see a friend Friday noght and i took my 15yr old son Bj with me as we have not seen her or her mum in ages. Well i was just about to leave when Bj all of a sudden asked for a drink of water and he was clutching his chest in pain. I freaked out as Bj has a v.s.d(venticular septal defect)(hole in heart). He went blue around the mouth and was having trouble breathing big time, so my friend called an ambulance for him  as he has complained of chest pain before but never to this extent ever. So ambulance arrived about 5 minutes after the call was made. They placed him on a heart monitor to check his heart rate, all was good. So they gave him the option of going to the hospital r going to dr today. To my horror and shock Bj said he would go to hospital,he is not one to willingly agree to got othe hospital or dr for that matter. So Bj went in the ambulance with my friend as i needed to come home to get my purse since i did not have it with me and they needed my medicare card and pension card so i did not receive a bill for ambulance. So they went off in ambulance i had to go and pick up my 17yr old daughters friends which was only 2 minutes from where i was and take her to my house as she was staying the night. I grabbed my purse and a can of cold coke as it was still warm outside last night at about 11pm. Got in the car and drove to the hospital which took me approx 15minutes to get there. Arrived at hospital and went to the desk where they told me he was not there surely i heard the right hospital he was going to. My friend had sms me to ask me to let Bj work know he would not be able to work today but it was late anyway to ring them. Next minute i see my son and friend walking out of the doors i laughed and gave the lady a filthy look as i was over it all and tired and totally stressed out about my son. So we sat in the waiting room of the hospitals emergency department  for anout 10minutes then Bj was called in. Oh my god we sat and sat and sat somemore for about 4 hours. They were so busy they had stabbings,bashings and whatever else was happening on a friday night around the local areas to the hospital. A t about 3.30 am i came home on the order of my friend to get some sleep and she would stay there with Bj until he was seen by dr. Not really wanting to leave him and feeling guilty if i did i came home and slept for about 1hour. My friend stayed there with him so i guess it was not as if i left him alone. But i still feel guilty he is my child and i should have stayed but i nearly collapsed on the floor i was that tired and agitated. So my friend rang me at about 5.15am to let me know i could go and pick them up. So i get in car drive 15 minutes again pick them up and we came home and went to sleep. I am just so tired today my eyes are burning i only got about 4hours sleep in total and had to get up to kids this morning

Got up this morning finally at 9.15 oh my god i am not used to that lol lol. Had my shower Bj was still sleeping so i just left him to wake on his own accord. The younger ones were already up and had dressed themselves and helped each other get breakfast too soo cute they are at times. Tidied up a bit then went down the streeet to get things o needed for tea tonight. Oh i almost forgot i am finally getting my new fence out the frnt of my house finally the monistry of housing is doing something right lol ol. They got here at about 8am bet my neighbours were not impressed oh well what can ya do that is life. If they need to start that early to get it done them=n that s when they need to start hey?? It is great wire fence not wooden like i had and it is higher than the old wooden one i had there that was falling to piec es big time. Now i am just sitting here typing away while the kids are watching the  simosons movie on dvd. The second time today they are watching it lol lol they must like it i think. Well ibetter go and do something before the rest of my day has gone. The younger children are going to their day carers tonight i think s i will be having a really early night tonight i think i am buggered. Well i hope everyone has a fantastic weekend and enjoy you xmas next week.. MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU ALL!!!! HUGS MICHELLE XXX OOO

Well yesterday was a busy day. I woke up at 6am as usual lol lol Yes my 7 year old Cody woke me up again as he does every morning lol so cute but i must admit.. Got up got ready while kids had their breakfast etcc... Did alot of running around yesterday too much to write about. I almost forgot Yesterday Harley had his kinder concert i was not really impressed with it as it started at 6pm and finished at 6.15pm not very long at all. The last few years when the kids had their concerts at kinder they went for about an hour so Harleys was not long at all it was even boring. It is hard and sad to say that because Harley was bored with it too he was yawning when meant to be singing etc...... Harley had made a calendar for me for next year it is so cute he has done pictures on it. I cant wait to put it up for all to see. He is having a party at kinder on Monday as this is his last day. The schoolies are having parties too that day.

Today i got up at 6.30 am Cody must have slept in as i woke him up this morning lol lol! Got up and shoered while all the kids got dressed and had breakfast to get ready for school. The younger three went to day care today she still has not got a car as yet but has borrowed one until she gets her new one which she is hoping to get by the weekend.. She is now going to be in debt again lol but that is cool as my son Tyson tells her he paid for her car lol so cute. He acts like he is married to his day care worker as he has been going there since he was 6mnths old so long time. Tyson bought home his report for the end of year today he has done pretty well considering all the hassles he had with his start to learning. The teacher has placed in there that he will have an individual learning plan for him next year, I do not know who his teacher is for next year as yet but i am sure he will get a good one. He has broken his glasses that he only got a month ago so we have had to order him a new pair. They should be here next thursday or wednesday. Today i went to court with the lkids dad as he has a couple of charges from months ago to deal with, But he will be fine he got it adjourned until feb next year. He is on a drug treatment order for 2 years he has been clean for 5 months now so he is going well. He has become the person i met 17years ago. He comes to visit the kids all the time and is actually going to pay to get my car fixed bout time he did something usefull lol lol. The kids adore him and enjoy seeing him all the time. Time will tell if we get back together but i am not sure about it as he has hurt me too much over the last few years. I have brought the kif=ds up while he was out using drugs and doing what he wanted that is why we split. I came home from court went shopping then came homa=e again and sat down and watched the tv.. Miracle that was i actually got to watch a whole tv show lol lol no interuptions lol lol lol

Well tomorrow i have my family support worker coming over for a visit it is good  to have her as she helps get alot of things done with the Department that i rent from government agencies who needs them they never do anything unless they have to. I then have to go and see my physciatrist after lunch tomorro so if i do not get a chance to log on tomorrow i hope every one has a wonderful weekend and i will be online over the weekend... Gee it is hot in my house tonight. The time has flown the kids think it is christams as they have been able to stya up a little longer tonight..

Well better go and put kids to bed i will chat to you all soon.

Please have a wonderful adn safe weekend!!

Hugs Michelle xxx ooo

p.s i am thinking of you all!!

Woke up at 6am as normal to my son Cody asking me if i was getting up yet???? So cute each morning he does this..

Got out of bed and got orgnised for the day.......! Kids went of to school at about 8.30am. I had to take Tyson for a eye test at 9am so he was late for school today he thought it was fun.. Had eye test then took Tyson to school as the preps were having photos done for some xmas thing they are doing for the parents. He almost missed out on doing this as his teacher thought he was going to be away for the whole day. All sorted  i came home to do housework...

I did some of my course for the day, while watching tv at the same time it was fun! I am currently up to unit 4 in the business course so i am ahead of the schedule for this. At about 2pm i had to go to Pakenham to pick up three of my kids from Day carers house. Picked the kids up came home to do tea for the night. School kids came home at 3.30 pm they all went outside to play. While they were outside Cody was riding a scooter and because Caydn felt like it he threw a rock at Codys head. There was blood in his hair and on his hand as he came in holding his head. The cut was not deep or too bad but it was sore. I placed a cold face washer on his head to try and stop it bleeding success... I then was wiping the blood off his face and noticed he also had a bump on his forehead from the rock.. He was not impressed. I went outside to get Caydn to come and apoligise to his brother which he did without argument... With this done Cody just lied on the couch watching tv while others were all playing outside. Cody felt sick so i just kept an eye on him for awhile. Tea was served so they all came into eat tea in peace i hoped but hoped wrong they never do lol lol they are kids always chatting and fighting lol lol

Once tea was finished the kids got their pjs on so they were ready for bed at 7.30pm..

Kids in bed i tidied up and got their clothes out for tomorrow as i usually do.. Then it was me tme so here i sit typing my blog for the day..How interesting lol lol lol he he he he

Oh i almost forgot i sms Bel a couple of times tonight thanks Bel for the sms I hope you are feeling better soon.. I will come pull that tooth out if ya want me too!! LOL LOL Only joking! but i do hope that tooth is not sore tonight and you get some sleep.

Now i have to go as am getting visitors for a cuppa and chat!! Hope you all have a great week!!

Thinking of you all xxx ooo xxx ooo

Woke up at 6.30am to get organised fort he day. We were going out today to my Brothers xmas party in Melbourne. Got readt kids had breakfast, got dressed then we tidied up a bit before we left at about 10am. W e aririved at the venue at about 10.45am there was no one there apart form some of the staff that organised it.. My Mum arrived about 5 minutes after we did. We found a table under the shade incase it ended up getting hot, that way the children were at no risk of sun burn. The kids went on the rides and yes so did i well at least once lol lol.

My Brother arrived about half an hour after we did and my Nephews  have grown up heaps since i saw them last!!!

Lunch was served at about 1pm, Salads,meat,sausages everything even jacket potatoes with sour cream yummo!!

The kids had races after lunch and my children came 1st or second in their age groups as they do each year! Once the races were finished Santa was  almost ready to arrive. My 13yr old Tiffany was one of santas helpers this year. She loved it and the kids loved seeing her as the helper. They kids got a present each and thought it was great seeing santa. Jaya shocked me as she did not even cry lol lol. She stood in front of Santa and gave one of her cheeky smiles!! lol lol

We stayed there for about another half hour to forty five minutes then packed up the car to return home. Got home at about 5ish had to organise tea we only had fish and chips as it was too late to go down the street to buy anything to cook. Ate tea got kids ready for bed they went to bed at about 7.40 and they were all crashed out in bout 5minutes lol lol They were worn out the poor things and so am i!!

I went up shops to get snacks for kids lunches tomorrow tonight so i do not have to get up early and go in morning!  Sitting here typing away thinking about going to bed.lol The neighbours have just came home from across the road with their work trucks making that much noise it not funny. If they wake my kids up i will yell big time........... They are riding a dune buggy up the street that they bought not nice.... They have their trucks parked out the front of my house  it k they rang and asked first but that is not the point.. The point is they bloody drive me nuts when they have been away for weeks on end then come home and make heaps of noise!!!!! They would not like it if i did it to them ....... NOT HAPPY AT ALL NOW!!!!!!

Well i am going to go to bed and hopefully get some sleep!! GGGGGGGRRRRRRRR Neighbours who needs them????? Anyone want new neighbours???? You can have mine for free!!!! lol lol

Hugs and have a great week!!! xxx ooo

Hi, Today i woke up at 6.30am. I was wide awake lol lol. Got up to get organised for the day. I had to go pick up 2 of my friends as we were going to the helping hand day today. Picked them up at 9.30am to get there early so we did not have to wait in line too long. Waited about half hour or less, went throught to get our hamper and some toys etc.... fror the kidss for xmas. It was all free. They do it every year. I came home went up shops to get stuff i needed for the dinner. Came home it was Jayas sleep time, so i put her to bed then when she was asleep i got the other children organised the younger ones as we were going to Belindas for Josie 1st b'day party. We arrived there about 1.05 ish or so.  I left the party about 3ish to come home and get tea for the kids. I bathed the kids then we ate tea. The kids sat and watched a movie before bed. When it was time for them to go to bed they were alseep in about 5 minutes as the were so worn out. While at the party they all bashed Belindas Hubby Kenny, they were trying to get a ball off him but he would not let it go. It was so funny to see, Belinda took some photos. Every one had so much fun. It was great to see Belinda so happy even though she has a sore neck,I hope it gets better for her soon. Well i have cleaned up and now am going to bed. I have another busy day ahead tomorrow. I have to go to Melbourne for my Brothers work xmas party that will go all day we will not get home until about 5 somewhere like that! So i will say Goodnight for now and blog tomorrow night! Have a greta evening and enjoy the rest of your weekend!!

Hugs Michelle xxx ooo

Well today i woke up at 6.30. Well actually Cody came in and asked me if i was getting up yet?? So cute at least i know he will not be late for school lol lol. Got up had shower dressed while kids had breakfast and got dressed for school. Went to the supermarket at about 8.00am this morning so i did not need to go ot later with the younger ones as they stayed at day carers last night and did not come home until this arvo. I was lost without them.. Dropped Tiffany at high schoolabout 8.25am drove home and just as i was getting home the primary aged were leaving my 15yr old son was walking them to school for me this morning. He has been helping so much lately it is great. Had an appointment at the kinder at 10am for Caydn to see if he can get an aide for next year as i have concerns about his behaviour next year. It is like a precaution i would say so he does not have the chance to hurt himself or any one else at kinder, He can be violent towards others. He may surprise me and be a perfect angel. I hope he is. Finished that appointment/meeting at 12.30 i was tired by then. Got home and did some housework before i had to go out again at 2.30pm. I have been busy all day i have only just got a chance to sit down. Went to see my phychiatrist this arvo to check my medication. He has added another tablet to what i am already taking as i have not been sleeping or eating well the last few weeks. I have to go back and see him next week again to see how this medication goes for the week. Came home about 4.30pm to start tea. A friend rang to say that she was coming over as she had a photo to give me of her two children and herself with santa lol. She had to be in the picture as her daughter screamed at santa she did not like him one bit lol lol she is only 1. So ate tea cleaned dishes got kids in pjs ready for bed. Children sat and watched tv for a while then they started to fight so i sent them to bed. They are all now sleeping except the older ones! I am sitting here just typing away!!

Tomorrow i am going to get a xmas hamper and some toys for the kids for xmas as they have helping hand day for people with pension and health care cards. That starts at 10am so i am getting there about 9.45 to line up as last time i went it was packed and waited about an hour to get in. I am taking some friends with me as they want to go too. It will be fun.lol lol how we will carry it all i do not know so glad i will have the car.

Tomorrow afternoon i am going to Belindas for Josies 1st B'day party that will be fun.

Any how that is my day for today will blog over the weekend when i get a chance.

I hope every one enjoys their weekend and has fun too!!

Well after my tests yesterday i thought i would get a great sleep last night. Boy was i wrong big time. I went to bed about 10pm after trying to get rid of pain i had. Tossed and turned till about 2am. I had pain in my right side and upper stomach. The Dr told me i should not have any pain well guess what i did, so i gather i am weird! lol lol

So got about 2hours sleep all night. I woke up at 5.30am after falling asleep at about 3ish some time i think. Got out of bed and could hardly move from the pain. Went into the kitchen and had a smoke i did not want to wake any one up but Cody was already awake. I had my smoke then i was standing there and almost passed out there and then. I grabbed a cold can of coke out of the fridge hoping that having a sugar fix would make me ok. Not to be. So i walked into the lounge in agony and i did not think i would make it there. Got into the recliner with Cody and lied there the whole time my head spinning round and round. I napped of and on for the next hour or so. I could barely move so i went and had my shower to get organised for the day. Kids got ready for school and left home about 8.20am this morning. Once they had gone to school i took the youngest two over to their day care worker as she still has no car! She is having them overnight tonight and bringing them home in the morning. One of her other parents has lent her a car for a while until her car gets sorted out after the accident. I have to go to the kinder tomorrow regarding Caydn for next year as he went the other day for about 2hours just so they could see what he is like, He was an angel as one expects a child to be around others.lol

When i have done that i am coming home to rest until the afternoon as i have an appointment with my physchiatrist at 3pm. He wants to see if putting my medication up has done anything for the way i am feeling. I wioo be telling him it has had no change i have lost interest in just about everything. So he may add another anti-deppressant to what i take now but i will see what he says anyway tomorrow. I will blog tomorrow night about it all.

Saturday i am going to Josies' 1st B'Day party(electrifying) my kids are so excited. I went out today and bought her birthday present so i hope she like it it is so cute!!

Sunday i have a xmas party to go to for my brothers work, i go every year so i will blog about my weekend as it goes!!

I hope everyone has a great week and enjoy the upcoming weekend!!

Hugs Michelle

MONDAY:

Hi, Well my week started well Monday that was. Seems so long ago. Woke up at 6.45am to the kids as usual. Got them all ready for school and day care. Off they all went apart from Harley who had kinder at 1pm. B.J had an exam in the morning and was last day at school for this year and  i do not think he will be going back next year. We have appointment Tuesday about him doing Community VCAL AND vet Automotive as well. Did my house work as usual as i have the routine the same each day so i have the rest of the day to do what i need to. Did some of my course it is going well so far. Went up the street to get things i needed for tea,dropped Harley at kinder then came home. Bjs' Youth worker came at 1pm to see him she was going to take him out but unfortunately it was raining so she chatted to him at home. She will be calling him on Thursday to see how he is going. Kids all got home from school about 3.30pm so there went my peace lol. Picked Harley up from kinder at 4.15pm and drove to Cardinia to drop him pff at Day care worker as she has the younger three overnight on Mondays. Dropped H arley off about 4.35 then started to head home. I was only driving and almost home when my mobile rang. My Family Day Care worker had been in an accident yes my children were in the car. I turned around and headed back towards where i had come from. I was going over the speed limit 120ks i was doing I did not know what to expect when i got there. There are heaps of ditches on the road she had the accident on, so i thought the worse. I was thinking "oh my god they have gone down the ditch and the car is on its roof". To my amazement the car was not in the ditch but almost there. The accident was not Day Care workers fault it was another driver who had smashed into her. It would take too long to explain how it happened so i wont do that. I got there and the children were in someo one elses car as the carers car was totalled to be nice. The Carer was holiding 2 of my children in her arms as they were upset not surprising. Jaya was sitting behind the drivers seat in her car seat Caydn was next to her then there was another child Riley. In the back of her 4 wd was my other son Harley. In the front was Adam and carer. The drivers side was smashed in and they were unable to get out that side so they all had to climb over and get out the passenger side of the car with help from the other driver who hit them. How the car was not in the ditch is amazing. Even the carer cannot work out how she managed to keep it out. She is still shaken from the accident and at the moment has no car so she is unable to care for the kids. She is the innocent one and is the one who is left with no car. The other car had only a smashed head light. That stinks to me. So i waited there with her until the police and tow truck arrived which was about an hour too long. At about 7pm the police left and the tow truck towed her car. I came home with the kids. Caydn kept telling me he did not like the man as he smashed Jody car. How cute. He also said that the man is a :bumhole" not nice but what could i say when he saw what he did and how Caydn had been affected by this. Luckily Jaya had a sun thing on her window so this i think protected her from seeing anything so she was fine just upset. Harley was asking the day carer every 5 minutes if she wanted a can of pepsi max! He was so worried about her. She ended up having one aboout half an hour later. Well that was my Monday!! Hope every one had a good Monday!

TUESDAY: Woke at 6.30am to the kids. Had my shower while kids got ready for school. They left at about 8.30 to get to school by 9am. Went to appointment with BJ in Dandenong to find out about the VCAL for next year. This went well. BJ has decided to do this next year as he wants to do mechanics so it is something he wants so i am hoping he wil stick with it the whole year. Came home went shopping. I had to do my preparation for my Colonoscopy and Gastroscopy Wednesday morning. I had to have stuff to clear my bowels out not very nice i can tell you. I was starving as i could not eat all day. I had to live on fluids. Tiffany made a chocolate cake so i was not impressed as i could not even have any. Oh well things happen. Bel sms me and asked if it was ok for her and Kenny along with the girls came over for a visit about 4pm. I said yeah sure that would be great to see them all. They arrived about 4.30pm we had a chat and Kenny was stirring me up saying he was having Fish and Chips for tea. I told him "I hope you choke on it" I was joking of course lol He told me he would take photos and send them to me so i hit him mucking around lol lol I knew he was joking but i can take it. He said this as i told him i could not eat until wednesday aftermnoon. I was starving lol!  I went to bed about 8pm i thought this good as i would be up and dpown all night going to the toilet. Not a very interesting but but good.

WEDNESDAY:

Woke up at 6am again. Had to get ready for the day. Had my shower while everyone else ate brekky which i could not have.I was not even able to have a drink. Kids all had brekky got dressed and were ready for school etc.... by 8am. They left at 8.15am for school. My mum came over frot he day i had to pick her up from station at 7.20am this morning. I had to go and pick Day care worker up as she took Caydn to the kinder for a while so that they could see how he is with other children for next year. I have appointment at kinder on Friday morning to see if we can get him help next year if they feel he needs it. Came home dropped them at kinder. Mum took Harley to school for orientation program. They had a teddy bears picinic today as this is last day for orientation program.

Their dad took me to the hospital as i had to be there by 10.15am. Arrived at hospital got booked in paid the money i needed to then was taken to a waiting room until it was my turn. Got changed into gown etc.... The Aneathatist came and placed a needle in my hand so he could put me sleep for the procedures when it was my turn. Wited another 15minutes then i was wheeled into room. Chatted to Dr who was doing the procedure. Aneathatist placed sleep drug in, I had to have a ring thing placed in my mouth so it was easier for the gastoscopy to be done. I was lying there and then the next  thing i know i am in recovery. I thought it was about 2pm but it was only 12.20pm. I had only been out to it r about 25 minutes in total. I had an oxygen mask on. The Dr came and chatted to me to let me know what they had found or should i say not found. They had found nothing abnormal but had taken lots of biopsies. I have an appointment with the Dr in January next year to get all results. But in the meantime i have to take some tablets 2 three times a day with meals to see if this helps with my constant diahoreah(spelt wrong i think). So now i am just sitting here resting as i am not allowed to do anything for 24hours. Rest in my house??? They have to be joking don't they?? Well anyway i am trying. Hope everyone is having a great day.

Thanlk you to Bel for being there for me and everyone else too. Thanks Alana for the chat this arvo, She did tell me off when i rang her as i told her i would call last night but did not. This is not why she told me of it was because i had just got home from hospital and i called her lol lol. She was joking with me. But now i am going to rest for the remainder of the day. I will be on again later or tomorro. Hugs to you all XXX OOO

Well i woke up at 6 am this morning like clock work. No kids here as the younger ones stayed the night woth Family Day care worker. She has them overnight on weekends it gives me a brek. I have been feeling really down this week but have tried to hide it and not let anyone see this!

Got dressed had my nice warm milo cleaned up a bit not that there was any mess lol. Had a friend visit me this morning as she is down from Wodonga staying at her parents place for a week or so. She does not like being at home she suffers anxiety attacks really bad, but when she is down here she is all good. My sister in-law rang me and i have not heard from them in about 6-9 months so it was great to catch up with her. Myself and my siblings are not really close. That is how i like it to be. My mum has been sick and i am really worried about her. My mum had skin cancer removed from her face 2 weeks ago and has been sick ever since. She has been vomiting and is unable to walk too far without her legs cramoing and back hurting. I am sure she is also thinking the worst. I have told her to rest as much as she can and i will see her when she visits next. Mum is coming over on Wednesday to see us all.

On Wednesday i am going to hospital for a gastroscopy adn colonoscopy. I am not looking forward to it at all. Every time i tell someone they ask what they are it is funny to see the look on their faces when i tell them lol.

I will be fine i know but it is just the thought of it all. I hope they find out what is wrong i hate going to the toilet so many times a day.(if you work out which i am talking about.lol the back end lol!) Yes i can make a joke about it but i guess we all need to so that we do not stress aboutit too much.

 I am going to pick the kids up at 3pm from day carer. I will come home and do some more of my course i just want to get right into it and show the ones here that have been negative toward sme doing it that i can do something for myself. I hate it when they are negative as i am always supporting them in things they do for themselves,Why cant they be proud of me??

Well i ahve to go do something. I hoep everyone is having a great weekend and it is not too hot for you!

THINKING OF ALL MY FRIENDS TODAY AND ALWAYS. THANK YOU ALL FOR BEING SUCH TRUE FRIENDS!

HUGS ALWAYS MICHELLE XXX OOO

Thank you to everyone who commented on my blog yesterday! It was great to see and read. It has made me feel more positive about doing this course i am now more determined than before! The last few days of the week i was really down and out. No energy, did not want to go out to the shops i hate it this feeling of no control. But today when i read the comments i felt a bit better  i must say!
So any way the course is going ok i guess some of the questions are a bit harder than others but i will get there i am sure of this!
Thank you to Bel for sms on Thursday wishing me luck with it all and every one else you all know who you are for making me feel better about myself this week. I will let you all know how i am going with it. I have actually done up to unit 3 already but they were the easy ones lol lol! I am not sure when i have my first assesment but when i do i will let you all know for sure! Thank you to Peita69 for offering help when i get stuck look out you woint be able to forget me in a hurry lol lol! Thank you heaps!
Well today i have been slowly doing what i needed to get done as i have no true energy left at the moment. The kids go to day carers for the night tonight so guess what i will be on msn so have ya drinks ready for a long chat as i will have my milo! lol he he Chat soon and have a great day hugs Michelle xxx ooo