This post is from from my other blog here This idea has been floating around in my head for months. I am not alone in pondering it.
It wigs me out really.
At what point does a woman give up on their sexuality?
To clarify, I am talking about the apparent lack of desire to care for oneself. Men do it too, however me not being a man I do not care (although if J let himself totally go I may care, although I cannot imagine). To further clarify, I am not talking about sweats, hair tied back, with running shoes as a mom uniform (hello I have yet to shower today!) I get that. I am a casual girl, never really “dressing up”, I tie my hair back and finding me time to pamper is totally hard.
I still want it.
I want to be pampered. Get a nice haircut. Look smoking hot in a pair of jeans. I want to display my style (or the lack thereof) with finesse. I want it.
Now some days are just blah days for sure. Nor I am not talking about weight, or clothes. It is not about money because I see upper middle class women doing the same thing. Yet it appears some women give up their sexuality completely. They cut their hair short and stop styling it OR they wear no make up OR their clothes are tattered and exhausted … they do not want it anymore. Maybe the tie to sexuality is wrong? How does one feel feminine at all if they look worn down? (side note: some short hair styles are smokin’, little to no make-up is totally cool, it is the ultimate give up not the actually look. I am not trying to pass judgment.)
When does that come?
I would like to duck and hide.
I want to want it…Forever.
My Grandmother takes good care of herself. She is still concerned with her appearance and presents herself to the world with grace. She is not vain or particularly fancy. She takes good care of herself.
That is what I want.
The desire to take good care of myself. No matter what the demands are on me, how old I am, my children, my husband … all important, but so am I. This is part of my desire to run and swim. We are saving all our spare change so we can work on the house. SO that eliminates fancy haircuts, days at a spa, cute clothes, adorable shoes, etc. Really me staying at home and choosing to live with one income forgoes the expensive, high maintenance look (although really even when I worked it wasn’t my thing). That leaves a few close to free options. I can run for free (minus the shoes and clothes but I try to make them last), swim for cheap (YAY Canada) and take good care of myself through natural treatment (have you ever tried avocado & mayo hair mask? it rocks!)
Have you all but given up? Am I just a vain witch? What do you do to keep yourself feeling beautiful, fresh, alive?
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LOVED Aro btw … he was my fave new character!
