It has been a very tough past 6 weeks.
- It started of with Rachel's favourite uncle passing away unexpectantly (heart attack)
- We then ordered emergency passports for Rachel and Joshua, and had a few hiccups trying to get them within the required 24 hrs.
- We then quickly flew to the Philippines for the funeral, with the kids and their grandmother.
- The day we flew back to Perth we find out that my mother has been emitted to hospital (emergency ward).
- One week later (Thu 11th June 2009) my mum passes away (clearly the lowest point of the past 6 weeks, if not my entire life).
- Organise and attend my mother's funeral and wake.
- Start to get sick (flu).
- Fly to Sydney to do business, and get mind off past few weeks... faint on the plane and go into cunvulsions (Rachel suspects fevoral convulsion). Shake with shivers for rest of flight, and nearly faint again on decent.
- Ambulanced from airplane to emergency ward, suspected swine flu, cleared and discharged from hospital 9 hours later.
- Re-emitted to hospital emergency ward 24 hrs later... struggling to breath, massively dehydrated, shivering uncontrollably, vomitting/diahria etc. 3 days later, lots of saline from IV drip, plenty of tests, etc, stablised enough to leave hospital and fly home with Rachel and Codi who flew over to save me (so happy they did).
- 1 week later good enough to get out of bed and be a little active again.
So like I said, a tough past 6 weeks, but by far the lowest point was my mum's passing. She had been fighting cancer for the past 14-15 yrs, however her death was still sudden and unexpected. For example, she had played 4 rounds of Golf leading up to the day she was rushed to hospital.... played golf Friday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, emitted to hospital Wednesday morning as she was struggling to breath in bed and couldn't fall asleep. Died 8 days later in hospital.
Her deterioration was rapid in hospital and it suddenly became clear that the end was fast approaching, I kept my brother and sister informed a few times a day and fortunately convinced them it was very serious and they jumped on a plane and arrived to spend the last few days with her.
I loved my mum, and was always so proud to be her youngest son. It is still surreal to think that she is no longer with us, and we will never be able to see her again.
Below are some of my favourite photos of mum and also my sisters eulogy from her funeral.
Mum when she was young.
Apparently she used to spend all day long playing along this riverside and on that wooden boat.
Mum was a champion swimmer.
Mum and dad in their early days. She was so beautiful.
At some function, they are just so well dressed and it looks like a magazine photo.
Mum and I at Rachel's and my engagement party.
Mum and dad at our wedding.
Mum relaxing with her first grandchild (Lilly) at Rottnest Island.
Mum doing what she loved most in the last 7 or so years... playing golf.
Mum relaxing on the boat at Rottnest.
Mum and dad went on cruise around the mediterranean earlier this year. Mum was still quite sick and had just been informed she needed to start chemo again. They didn't want to go, but had already booked and paid... fortunately they loved it, and I am so happy they went.
Mum in hospitl a few days before she passed. This is actually the last energetic action I saw her take... a high 5 to Joshua, her youngest grandchild.
And here is my Sister's eulogy at mum's funeral...
Gay was born in Guildford on 1st Feb 1940. She was one of 6 children – the 4th.
The O’Malley family lived on the banks of the river in Belmont and her father was a horse trainer. She had a passion for swimming and riding. Her horse was called Silver, an old race horse, and they used to ride as far and wide as the airport and the hills, with short stirrups, mainly at the gallop. She also helped exercise the horses in the rowboat. And during the depression Gay and her father used to string a net across the river to catch brim for the family tea. She also whiled away the hours rowing up and down the river to the reed beds with Buster her brother. The old house is no longer there but the tree still stands where the rowboat was tied. The Rowe highway bridge sits over the original sight.
Swimming was a passion and Gay was very good at it, something she got from her beloved mum. She swam in the river and trained under the guidance of Percy Oliver. Gay had success – winning most races she entered for many years. She swam for WA in the National titles and came 5th – by a fraction – against Dawn Fraser. She missed out on being a member of the winning Australian world record Olympic relay team – by that much.
Stepping back – Gay went to Belmont Primary School – she used to eat lunch on a bench between two trees. It is still there on the corner of the highway. High school was split between Girdleston and Governor Stirling. This was when Lorne first set eyes on Gay – The amazing Gay O’Malley he had read about in the newspapers. – AT A swimming carninval between his school and hers. She was HOT.
A year later Gay and Lorne found themselves at teachers college in Claremont together. At the first social dance they danced together – all night long. They didn’t date until the end of teacher’s college though. Gay always laughed about Lorne’s rendition of the Punch and Judy puppet show.
Gay and Lorne married in 1963 in Dalkeith and moved into a brand new home in City Beach together. Lorne played football and Gay was always in the stands watching. The party venue after the game was always their City Beach house. Their first child Amanda was born in 1965, some say a result of the 64 grand final… On the night of the arrival Lorne had played football the day before and when the phone rang to say it was time, Lorne said -- ‘that is great’ -- and rolled over for a bit more sleep. Gay always talked about bringing home the baby and not having a clue... They had stopped at the pharmacy on the way home and grabbed some supplies. Needless to say I survived.
Damon was next – 2 years later in June 1967.
The City Beach house was the scene of many happy O’Malley and Cook Christmas parties with a big pool and trampoline. The pool had been paid for over 2 summers by Gay teaching swimming lessons to all the kids in the area. People still stop and tell you that Gay taught them to swim.
Through the 70s Gay taught sport and health classes at City Beach high school, Balcatta and Swanbourne. She ran daycare centres, the first with Bernadette Giambazzi in Nedlands. This was when the 3rd child arrived – Clay was born in 1975, a happy surprise. She also owned Woodlands daycare and set up and ran Subiaco childcare centre. Between these centres Gay and Lorne owned bakeries in Vic Park and Bentley, where Lorne baked the bread and Gay worked the counter.
Other passions in the 70s, 80s and 90s were watching the kids sailing – usually from Birdwood Parade with binoculars. She could pick out sail numbers from miles away.
Subicare is where the first battle with breast cancer was fought – Christmas 1995. She worked throughout this battle and remained at Subi for many years later – retiring after 17 years. The centre recently dedicated a plaque to Gay in honour of her work. Many of the original staff are still there.
Retirement brought the time for her to find her final passion – GOLF…..
She was a very proud member of the Cottesloe golf club, playing pennants and a Tuesday Leader – her aim was always to get her handicap under 20. Gay practiced, took lessons, played and tutored most days with the girls and Lorne. She loved every minute.
Whenever Gay and Lorne visited any family the golf clubs went too. They played – amongst others – Royal Pines, Bonville, Coffs Harbour, Royal NSW in a roaring 35 knot gale, Cromer, Killara, Commonwealth and Huntingdale – I did say amongst others.
Gay also squeezed in water aerobics, book reading – nearly one a night- Seinfeld, CSI Miami and the Sopranos and loved nothing more than going to Rottnest on the boat to watch Lorne catch his crayfish.
Mostly she loved being surrounded by her 3 children and 5 grandchildren Lillian, Reuben, Josephine, Codi, and the youngest Joshua.
Gay fought for the last 5 years to beat her cancer – with humour, determination and good spirit. She never let it stop her from what she wanted to do but it finally wore her down. On Thursday morning Gay had had enough – in her words – ‘that’s it’ – she stopped. She was never a victim. She was a fighter and a prime example of strength.
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