woo hooo I have jsut talked to Aidan....I had made the decision that if I could not get through to him today then I would make any necessary  decsions I had to to keep him safe....He came to me on his own accord and talked to me....He told me he is sorry for going off his meds...phew maybe he is seeing that they do make a difference that they do allow him to live a close to normal life....one can only hope but one should not get their hopes up either.... hehe.... Positive is the best policy but isn't it.... i am going to the doctor myself again I really do think maybe it is time again for me to go to some sort of counselling again...it seems all the right things go out the window at times when he is one of his lows or in self destruction mode.....I instantly slip into the I need to protect him at any cost.....this is not a good thing maybe if I try to talk to someone about what to do in this situation... who knows but again I can just live every day as it comes hey....