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DarleneRutledge
44 years old

Australia Australia



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Curtis, male
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  On Minti Since:
November 2008
 
 
  Last Online:
March 2009
 
 
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My Recent Gifts

Me and My Family

My Family

I am a solo of mum of 3 aged 15, 14 and 11 -  Two boys born 14 months apart and a girl.   I have been on my own for 9 years and believe the most important thing about being a parent is honesty and ALWAYS being considerate of my childrens needs and feelings.

My children are all completely different, one sporting but with behavioural problems, one academic overachiever but has no friends, and then there's my daughter who is 11 going on 30 and has a total mind of her own.

Life is always full on between working and raising these incredibly individual children.   I didn't have children until I was 28 and never thought of myself as being a mum - ever!!!   until I had my first.   And I have absolutely LOVED every minute (even the REALLY DIFFICULT ones) since.

We've had a very full life so far, we've moved interstate and then internationally to NZ, then back to Perth in 2006 where I bought my first home.   Life is so full of challenges sometimes it's really difficult to get through the day, but at the end of it all it's still a BLAST.   I'd rather be tired on my feet than bored out of my mind.

 


Advice

[see all advice]
How to stop the littlies interrupting every time you're on the phoneNovember 2008 (Worth a try) (Worth a try) (Worth a try) (Worth a try) (Worth a try)

Friends

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matthew

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mystikal

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rcp-432


Blog

08
Dec
2008

A Mothers Worst Nightmare

Comment Published at 18:2518:255 comments5 comments21 Visits21 VisitsReport

A mother passing by her teenage daughter's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then she saw an envelope propped up prominently on the centre of the bed. It was simply addressed "MUM"......with the worst premonition she opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:

Dear Mum

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing to you, I had to elope with my new boyfriend, John because I wanted to avoid a scene with dad and you.   I've been finding real passion with John and he is so nice, even though he is 54, divorced (I think) and on parole, and also with all his piercing, tattoos, beard, and motorcycle clothes.   But it's not only the passion mum, I'm pregnant and John said that he will take care of me and we will be very happy.   He already nearly owns a caravan on the outskirts of Wagga and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter.

He wants to have many more children with me and that's now one of my dreams too.   John taught me that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone and we'll be growing it for us and also for trading it with his friends for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.   In the meantime I ask that you pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so John can get better; he sure deserves it.   Don't worry mum, I'm nearly 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself.   Some day we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your grand children.   

Your daughter, Nikki

P.S. None of the above is true. I'm next door. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my report card which is in my desk drawer. I love you.....please call me when it is safe for me to come home

 

25
Nov
2008

My Son's First Sex Ed Lesson

Comment Published at 04:1704:170 comments0 comments19 Visits19 VisitsReport

My eldest sons school decided to give an "introduction to sex education" lesson to the students in year 5 (10yo).   This was the first of it's kind in the school, real sex-ed lessons started in year 6.   Permission slips were sent out, and a very brief explanation of the course content, then reminders were sent as the day drew nearer.   The lesson was scheduled for the last day of the term.

As this was my oldest child, it was also my first experience with children learning about sex.   I was just as nervous as he was, actually I think more nervous!

What would he be learning?

What would he come home and ask me about?

Could I answer his questions without being embarrassed?

How much would he know?

How much would I have to tell him?

The day finally arrived and I tried to downplay it, treat it as just another day, but inside I was SO nervous.   After school I waited nervously out the front of his class, and finally out he came.

"How was it?" I asked.

"What?" he said

"The sex ed lesson" I said (secretly happy it didn't seem to be such a big deal to him).

My darling 10 year old instantly stood straighter, squared his shoulders, tugged the front of his shirt down and said:

"That's OK Mum, now I know all about your pyramids"  

22
Nov
2008

The Daughter I Always Wanted

Comment Published at 00:2600:265 comments5 comments22 Visits22 VisitsReport

I always wanted to have a daughter.   When I was a teenager and was daydreaming about having kids I always pictured myself with a daughter, never with a son.   Then I fell pregnant and the daydreams were constant, all I could picture was a beautiful little girl in pretty dresses singing and skipping.  

I gave birth to a lovely, healthy, energetic boy - Master C.   Master C was an absolutely gorgeous baby, blue eyes and blonde hair, full of laughter and fun, mischevious and loud and happy and unbelievably energetic.  I absolutely adored him.

When Master C was 6 months old I stopped breast feeding and within a week had the most horrendous period.   What I didn't know at the time was that the IUD I'd had implanted after Master C was born, came away with the period, and lo and behold I fell pregnant again.

And the daydreams began again.  I would find myself seeing that beautiful little girl everytime I folded clothes or washed dishes.  I could see the colour of her hair, hear the pitch of her voice, smell the wonderful frangrance of her as she cuddled me tight and I could feel her arms around me.

9 months later Master B was born, so wonderfully quiet and placid, so full of wonder and trust, so different to Master C, he would sit quietly and play and was totally content with everything in his world.  He was, and still is, the most pleasurable person to be around.

3 years later I fell pregnant again and the daydreams came again, I so much wanted a daughter this time.   The odds seemed stacked against me tho'.    My grandmother, a very wise woman, always said our generation would have all boys.   I have 2 brothers and a sister and between us we had, by then, 1 girl and 6 boys.   It seemed she was right - but still I hoped and prayed and dreamed.

By that stage tho' my relationship with my husband had hit rock bottom and he insisted I abort as 'he never wanted 3 kids'.   I absolutely refused and when the first tri-mester was over and abortion was no longer an option, he left me and our two little boys.

Every month when I went to the docs I asked during the ultrasound if he could see the sex, and "yes" he said, "I can see it's a boy".  The tune to 'My Three Sons" played constantly in my head.   I didn't stop hoping tho', I knew that sometimes the ultrasounds are hard to see and that maybe. just maybe, it was wrong. 

The pregnancy went well, but life was hard.  I had two little boys and was a solo mum.   I worked 2-3 jobs at a time all the way until 38 weeks.   For 4 months I worked 2.5 days in one office, and 2.5 in another, driving halfway across town in my lunch hours to get to the other job ontime, and then worked in a video store on weekends.   But we got through it.   When it got really hard I would sometimes wonder "why didn't I abort" and always the image of the little girl I wanted so badly would pop into my head.

When I was 8 months pregnant my doc became concerned because I had lost so much weight.   I should have been gaining heaps as it's the baby's time to grow, so he sent me to have hi-tech ultrasounds at our biggest maternity hospital.   Once again, I asked "can you see the sex?", and once again I was told "yes it's a boy".  The tune in my head got louder.

My baby was due on the 2 September, but everyone said it should come early as it was my 3rd.  But the due date came and went.  I was so exhausted and fed up with being pregnant that on September 4 I decided to go for a very long walk to see if I could help it along.   I told my best friend I was going and set off with my two little boys in hand.  We must have walked about 40 minutes, at a slow pace so I didn't wear the littlies out, when I heard a car horn behind me.   There was my bestie come to pick me up.  She took us back to her house and put the kettle on. 

While we were waiting for the kettle to boil my waters broke.   If she hadn't come and got me, I would have been standing in the middle of the street, miles from home, with two boys under 5.  Thank God for besties!!!

The labour went well and at 11.15pm I gave birth.  The doc was delivering 3 babies that night and so it was the midwife who actually did the delivery.   She placed the baby on my stomach and said "there you go love, you've got a boy".   I was so exhausted, and so resigned to the fact that it was a boy, I just layed there and cuddled my new baby.

10 mins later the doc managed to get back to me and he took my baby off to examine.   I was just laying there recovering when I heard him say from the other side of the room - "Darlene, you know this isn't a boy baby don't you?"

I couldn't believe it...... the midwife and all the hi-tech ultrasounds had got it wrong.   I had my wish - My Little Miracle - My Beautiful Wonderful Baby Girl.  

I named her Bethany - some books say it means "from the house of God" others "from the house of poverty" either way its appropriate.

Bethany is now 11 years old and I treasure and love her so much.   She is very willful and has had to stand up to two older brothers all her life so she can be quite a handful at times.  But whenever it gets hard I remember how hard I fought to even have her, how much I went through to bring her into this world, and how lucky I am that I have the daughter I always dreamed of.

 

20
Nov
2008

I PROMISE MYSELF

Comment Published at 17:3317:330 comments0 comments20 Visits20 VisitsReport

This was written by Christian Larsen nearly 100 years ago.   I have it framed on my wall and whenever things start to get to me I read it like a mantra.

THE OPTIMISTS CREED

I PROMISE MYSELF to be so strong that nothing can disturb my peace of mind.

I PROMISE MYSELF to talk health, happiness and prosperity to every person I meet.

I PROMISE MYSELF to make all my friends feel that there is something worthwhile in them.

I PROMISE MYSELF to look at the sunny side of everything and make my optimism come true.

I PROMISE MYSELF to think only of the best, to work only for the best and to expect only the best.

I PROMISE MYSELF to be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as I am about my own.

I PROMISE MYSELF to forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.

I PROMISE MYSELF to wear a cheerful expression at all times and give a smile to every living creature  meet.

I PROMISE MYSELF to give so much time and energy to improving myself that I have no time to critisize others.

I PROMISE MYSELF to be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

I PROMISE MYSELF to think well of myself and to proclaim this fact to the world, not in loud words but in great deeds.

I PROMISE MYSELF to live in the faith that the whole world is on my side, as long as I am true to the best that is in me.

 

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