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Member » emmie » Blog » Its all over , Ive had a misca...
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Ok so ive been told i am better off to do this to help me come to terms with what has happened because i am not dealing wsith this at all.
So i went to A&E i told them i was 7 and a half weeks pregnant i have had pains for over 24 hours and i am bleeding more than a heavy period . I then had a thousand questions how do u know you are 7 and a half weekss pregnant bla bla bla . She told me to take a seat and she will call someone right away to see to me. While sat there i noticed my gynecoligist walked in . His son had a sore wrist i noticed he sat his son down and walked through A&E then a dr come and got his son . So of course that wound me up i went to the toilet by this point things were progressing fast i knew i was having a miscarriage it was obvious it had soiled my trousers and going all over the floor. I went back to the desk and asked how much longer i have to wait as thjngs are getting serious its everywhere!! She said go straight through and grab a nurse and tell them what is happening .
By this time i was a wreck i couldent talk to a nurse if i tried i just stood at the nurses station drippping with blood . Barry grabbed the most lovely nurse she was wonderful so kind and caring. She took us into this room she didnt want me by the nurses station to give me privacy . She went and got her bits to examine me as she explained she needs to examine me so she can see wheather i am miscarrying or not just like a smear . Barry helped me get undressed she was back real quick in the time it took her to examine me i had lost at least 2 pints of blood she was rather shocked . She said she hasnt seen anytrhing like this before. She explained to me holding my hand that people do bleed in pregnancy and go on to have healthy pregnancys but to this volume it usually means something is wrong. She said going only by her gut instinct and experience i am having a miscarriage she could not tell me for sure because there is just too much bloodto see anything. She then took my bloods and got a drip in.
She then said she is going to take me through to resuss so that thery could keep a proper eye on me i was loosing blood fast and needed monitoring constantly as i was getting weaker and weaker and they didnt know how serious it was going to get.
I got in resuss i was suddenly surrounding by nurses getting the dripos going paracetamol going through a drip , They had the blood pressure machine attached to em checking my blood preasure everyu 60 seconds they needed me under 100 and i went over 137 thats the highest i recall i was shaking so much cos i was freezen cold Barry thought iwas having a fit but it was just because i hadlost so much blood. Also they put a drip in my handaswell to get fluids into me as i was loosing blood fast . After that the kind nurse clocked out i had a nice nurse and a horrible nurse monitoring me.
After the first lot of paracetomol and fluidi asked if i could go to the toilet as i was dying for a wee. She said i couldent walk imat high risk of collapsing she said they need to get me stable but she could bring me a portable toilet in . I jumped at the chance Barry was about to leave to get me some knickers and stuff i would need. But i wanted him to help me onto the toilet . While i was going toilet the nurse sorted out the bed i was there about 5 mins in which time i lost loads of clots big ones i was squeezing barrys hand i knew full well what was happening. I got back into bed and barry went to get my stuff and my dad the nurse got the painkiller and drips going and the blood preasure thing.
Suddenly the horrible nurse was back. With a specimen bottle which she put in front of me on the table. She said we think you have now had a full miscarriage. This is the urine from what you did on the portable toilet. It also contains pieces and she gave it to me. She said take a look for yourself. I was so horrified what do you know inmy hand i hold the foetus which would have been our baby how sick and cruel. I put it back on the table looked at her i nearly slapped the cow and just told her to get out !!!! She didnt get it though and come back with tissue she was shoving it in my face iwent to hit her and just knocked the tissue flying i shouted i dont wamt no Fing tissue i want my baby back .
I could hear Barry and my dad outsaide and grabbed the tissue and bottle off the side and wrapped it sobarry didnt see i hid it in my hands in the blanket i didnt want Barry to see. Barry walked in and i just told him its over its gone and broke down . I dropped the specimen and the stupid nurse shown him . I took it off him and put it back on the table and told her to leave me alone!!!
Believe it or not she was back man that woman is lucky to still be breathing she wanted to examine me to see if she can see any more bits hanging around the cervix and explained that there might still be bits inside and i may need to go to theatre for a D&C or if its in reach she can just remove them also she had to check if my cervix was opened or closed because of the amount i was still bleeding . We went ahead shje was mean there too i swear she hated me and i will be complaining when i am up to it. She was really hurting me and the other nurse was tellling me what was happening andall she was doing is removing clots. The cervix was closing up and the bleeding was calming down.
I was told if i wanted i could go up to a ward for 2 hours to be monitored or you can stay on the ward over night and to be honest i could not wait to get home to my baby girl i just wanted to be at home so i agreed to 2 hours on a ward. I cant remeber much about what happened up there all i remember is my dad taking me for a stroll in a wheelchair i was desperate to get outside. I had an arguement with mr drip i couldent get my top on cos the drip was pulling my arm . After we came back i dont remember anything up until the nurse came to check everything was under control and that i could go home once i had been examined and my drips were taken out . She examined me and said everything is calming down i need to rest lots and the bleeding should stop in a few days. I need to have at least 2 periods before we start again but i dont think i will be having sex for a while anyweay. and i was discharged .
I haveto do a test in a week and if it still shows positive i have to ring them straight away . Since i have been home i have just been doing nothing thinking . ive spent most of the time in bed crying or just sat here. The hospital rang this morning they wanted me to go for a scan today but i said i really wasnt up to it i just wanted to be at home today. So she asked what the scan was going to find so i told her i have had a miscarriage yesterday so she said in that case it was best left until tomorrow so i haveto go the early pregnancy unit for 9.40 i think she said cant quite remember it might be 9.50 . just to check the whgole foetus has came away.
After the scan i will be going to see my doctor i want him to check me over to make sure everything is ok . Also i need councelling bad i cant get the foetus out of my head its driving me crazy. I cant help think where it is now . I have told Kylie and she didnt take it well at all she cried her heart out . I left it until after school i didnt want to tell her and then give her a kiss goodbye just couldent do it. So my dad picked her up she came in with flowers for me and acard her teacher let her make for me at school. Bless her. She asked if iwas going to tell her why i had to go hospital now so i took her into my room . I just told her that mummy had a bit of bleeding because the baby in mummys belly was sick and needed to go to heaven . I thought she would take that the best unfortunatly i was wrong . She burst into tears fell in my arms and told me she wanted it back I told heri did too but we have to let it go . Since i told her she started playing up . I mhoping she will forget about it soon enough.
Sorry but i had to do this for myself.
Luv Emz xxx   |
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