Hi from Australia. I'm now an "empty nest" mum, but have done afterschool tutoring ever since my daughter was born to meet a need but also to earn a small income to enable me to be at home as much as I could with my daughter. We also fostered many, many children on a short-term and long-term basis for 13 years, so I'm quite used to juggling time and food and conflicting routine issues. You seem to be doing very well - keep it up. In my experience, if you can be convincing that you are in charge, coupled with sensitivity and compassion, the kids soon fall in with your way of doing things and have a sense of security in that, even if their routine is totally different elsewhere. Fostering, tutoring and babysitting certainly impacted our daughter; sometimes negatively, but on the whole helped her to share and value what she had, as well as gaining a greater sense of understanding of and compassion for others. You have already helped E to see this as something you are doing together rather than just your job, so she will feel quite special and grown up. You seem to be working out the fees situation quite well - I'm a trained teacher so can potentially charge more (and pay tax from it), and at the moment tutor 4 different children (aged 5-12 yrs) each school afternoon. I could not have handled 20 students a week when my daughter was younger, but it has turned into a satisfying and flexible line of work - you never know where this will lead for you. There will always be a demand. If you can, get some Child Protection training (maybe through your church?) to help parents feel safe with you. I am a Christian also, and have seen my tutoring work as a real provision for our family as well as for the children who have needed extra help and for their parents who have not known where else to turn. All the best, S.

 Dear EF, I'm out of my league here, helping you with any ideas hehe!....I'm sure what ever you decide to charge the boys parent will be more than pleased to pay.

What a lucky boy having you to teach him in all the areas he needs help, by reading your comments you have been getting the tips you need to help him.

You would do such a excellent job with any child you took under your wing....I sincerely hope this will be the opportunity to open  a new door for you & E....in return making life easier for you both.

Love Janice xxxx

Hope it all works out for you all, and the boy is lucky to have you as his tutor..

xx cazza

Sounds good hope all goes well for you

Love Pauline

Sounds like a wonderful opportunity!

My suggestion about wages is to come up with your schedule first and get a clear idea of what you'll be doing. Of your 6 hours per week, how much time will you be just a child minder (ie, meal times, or  he's watching non educational tv, or other non enriched kid activity). How much time will you be music teacher? I'd suggest taking each of these things, look at the average wage for each, and work out a rough amount, and round UP. (Your time, effort and energy is worth LOTS)

As for meals, I'd suggest you work out a flat rate with the family- that if he's with you for a meal, it's an extra so much. At work, we have set rates of 14$ per lunch and 19$ for supper, for staff and foster parents... welfare clients get 20$ per day. From the rates you mentioned, it seems that our dollar and your pound have the same buying power...

I don't know much about Sri Lanka, but if you haven't you may want to ask about their culture/religion, just so you know what may be problematic. Especially in terms of foods... so many cultures have rules around eating... and things like table manners, how to show respect and social politenesses. Most people I've talked to ( in the days when I lived in a residence with international students) are quite willing to discuss these things, and releived that they didn't have to bring it up...

As for your wages, will this be official, declared income, or just private? Most programs have a certain amount you can earn without it being deducted, and for most people, even the deduction is worth doing the work... even though most people here don't see it like that. And most people don't declare babysitting here and there... but then most people don't hold themselves to the letter of law either...

As for E, if she's welcoming his being there, I think it'll be okay, especially at first. I'd say, just watch for signs of jealousy, and take steps now to prevent it. I'd suggest you set aside special time the other nights for the two of you to have something special, or even just to make sure that nothing interupts your opportunities to have the kind of time you normally did without this boy... Hey, it may just teach her to value what she's had!

Another thought on your wages would be to calculate how much you need to earn to get off the system, work that over your 6 hours a week, and see what you get... I"m guessing you'd need more hours than that to get off the system totally... But work is so satisfying...! Just from what you've said, I"m guessing about 15 an hour - simply half as much as a fully trained proffesional, because you're an unofficially trained person. And hey, you can always start there (or somewhere) and negotiate as needed...

boy I've gone on on your blog! Hope it helped... boy do I have ideas on this!

I Am's Child.

-G-oodluck sweetie let us know how it goes xxx

ok, well it turns out that I don't need to feed him, he will have his evening meal straight after school before his parents bring him to my place.  It does mean that E eats hers while he is here, but he brought some crisps and a bottle of drink with him today, so I guess that works.

so I guess it is just supporting him with his educational needs.

Still welcoming any ideas and input though - have spent much time ont he phone today getting thoughts and opinions of others too

Peace
EF.x