Hi All

Thanks for all your messages of good luck it means alot. Ive been in hospital a week, they thought I was getting an infection. Still pregnant and Ive hit 30 weeks! Unfortunately my cervix has softened so Im in hospital on complete bed rest hoping that contractions dont start. My phone next to my bed had internet but its awful to use. I miss Ruby... she doesnt understand leaving me in here, she comes to visit so happy and leaves crying mournfully. I hate it, I think Im having separation anxiety. Cos Ruby was so premmie I have been so protective of her and have never really left her before... its driving me nuts. Thanks for your support everyone, its getting a bit lonely in here,

Love Em xx

So its been an awful week. On tuesday night I felt exhausted, I sat down and whoosh... waters came out, about a mug full. Enough for me to panic. We went straight to the hospital, they confirmed I had leaked my waters. I was kept it, told the next 24 hours was crucial to prevent the onset on labour. I was 27 weeks.... So I got given steroid injections to mature the babies lungs, and super strength antibiotics to stave off infection. I got released yesterday on bed rest. I couldnt sleep at the hospital was getting so stressed out.... and I missed my baby. Ruby has never been away from me before... I missed her so much, shes coping well but its traumatic. Basically Im back in hosp for daily checks to see how things are going. Prognosis... well its likely Im going to have an early baby and it just depends how long I hold on for now. Last night I got a couple of contractions but they were an hour apart and appear to have gone overnight... Im just praying they dont come back... Im 28 weeks now. Its too early. I know that great advances have been made but its still too early. Ruby was five weeks early.... with placental abruption. I dont think my body likes pregnancy very much. Im just glad for every 24 hours that passes. Although I really feel like its going to happen soon. Can only pray...

Well my consultant gave me a scare last week.. the infection I had is caused by a bacteria that can also cause early labour... so Im having to keep being retested to see if I need more antibiotics. The doctor scared me by saying he thought i had a 25% chance of premature labour. Im under instructions to take it easy and no more long journeys (haha no more trips to the inlaws!). So Im kinda worried but trying to stay calm, its also hard to take it easy with a potty training toddler! So my nesting instinct has started... ie I shouted at John on sunday if he didnt put Ruby's toddler bed up and sort out her room I was going to move back in with my parents! And Ruby's bed is up! Its lovely a white sleigh bed and she loves it. Ive managed to get her to fall asleep in it for three nights running! Quite an achievement as shes only ever fallen asleep on me up till now! Although she isnt going to sleep till 9pm and Im having to lie next to her till she goes to sleep.. but shes been sleeping till 7.30.. she always used to wake up at 5!

Have been researching real nappies, have decided I like the look of wonderoos, they look great. Am dying to buy a big set but need to wait till bubby is born as I dont know the sex, might just get a unisex starter pack then I can add to it. Im also starting to buy stuff we need for the new baby, which isnt a huge amount, unless its a boy when it'll need a whole wardrobe! Thank god John got paid for a photography job this week so we managed to put the money aside to buy stuff. Am buying it all online to try and take the stress out of going shopping. All Im doing is shuffling one street to my mum and dads and taking ruby to a few toddler groups a week. Have abandoned all cleaning.. what a nice doctor to tell John he should do the hoovering.. what a shame he didnt mention the ironing...

Hope everyone is well x

Well we've just got back from our holiday yesterday.. and I was hoping to report a relaxing happy week... but NO... it wasn't to be. We went to my in laws caravan in longleat wiltshire, in the grounds of a lovely stately home and safari park. But within half and hour of arriving ruby threw up... and well got gastric flu... she just threw up etc for three days solid, on the third day i got really concerned she wasnt drinking enough so we took her to the doctor. And she was admitted with dehyration and had to go on a drip. When I get her out I say to John lets go home early.. but he says no lets just give it one more day... cue him getting gastric flu and is unable to drive for another 5 days. Meanwhile we cant leave the caravan which is tiny and built for people at least half a foot shorter than me. I got bad back ache cos Ruby wanted to sleep with me in a tiny single bunk... then to top it all off on the last awful day I started getting stabbing stomach and back pains... kidney infection....ARGH now Im on superstrong antibiotics. So a disaster to say the least. Im never stepping foot in a caravan again.. So now after looking after Ruby and John through their sickness I get to be looking after myself through nasty infection as John goes back to work today. Holidays... never work out good for us!

So off to see my consultant again this afternoon, Im now nearly 26 weeks pregnant.. and boy do I feel like an elephant. Ive told John Im not leaving london now till after the baby is born!