When my boy was worried about this as he learned about death, I ended up telling him that by the time I was old and died, hopefully he'll be older than I am now, will have children of his own and they will be saying the same thing to him that he's saying to me now. I also explained that if people didn't die, we wouldn't be able to have babies because we'd over-populate the world so fast we'd run out of food and houses and everything and then too many people would be hungry and homeless and that's not a good thing. Lastly I got it through to him that no matter what happens, there will always be someone to look after and love him. I don't know what part of it sunk in, but he seemed to accept it all then.

I think our girls are heading for all this too.  Not sure how we are going to tackle it, but being creative, i'm sure I'll come up with something! lol.

 Poor little thing! This is something that still gives me issues.

When Malachi first got concerned about the seperation after death, I told him that he did not have to leave us, but that he was able to join us when he left this earth too. That lead to a whole new and exciting conversation, the outcome of which I am very happy with!

Ah yes, Caty is mulling over these ideas too! The de stresser in all this death and what happens has been relieved from me by "The Big Sister Syndrome" and "Wild Imagination Factor".

Ruth's explanation goes something like this:

When you get old you cant walk very well (Granpa =stroke)!!!!!!!!!!! and it hurts( Auntie Ruth =Arthirits) or Cigarettes kill you(Granny=Cancer)!!!!!!!!! So you die then become an Angel with wings!

Now Angels are pretty big and there are gazillions of them, so if they were flying around in this realm they would get knocked down by Aeroplanes, Space Shuttles and Satelites!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So they go to heaven which is a much bigger realm where there are Angel motorways and you only bump into friends!!!!!!!!!!!

They can however pop in to visit anytime, they just can't be solid or seen for safety sake!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So when you leave stuff one place and go back and it has moved or gone missing you know an Angel has visited you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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So when Caty throws her shoes off and I ask where she took them off and left them she will reply something like "it's o.k Mummy, Seanna (granpa) is wearing them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Big Sisters are really good at finding excuses for not tidying up after themselves, dont  you think!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now I must retreat and search out all the socks the Angels(Hubby) have been hiding under our bed,LOL.

Luv Winnie.xxxx

Hope he comes to terms with it soon. It's a big thing, to think that mummy & daddy wont be here some day. Because of my mum's health I started preparing E at about M's age, and just said that she was wearing out and getting sad about it, but when she got to heaven she would get a new body and mind which worked great, and that it was one long party in heaven so she will have a better time there than we will all left behind missing her. So far E has only had to deal with losing her 87 year old Gt Grandma & her 93 & 98 year old Gt Gt Aunts. I have been telling her to take care of her self (along the lines of what Frontier has written) so she will "live to be 100" like she wants to! And not to run infront of cars. I also chatted to her last night about how much of his life her Gt Grandad sacrificed dying at 35 in WW2, and how grateful we all were that he missed so much so we could enjoy Peace. I also probably confused her no end by sharing about how freaky I find it looking at my hands now and seeing my mum's hands from my childhood (ie I am nearly the age now she was when I was born), and that one day her hands will look like mine. Dont think she could quite believe they wont always be smooth and elastic like now LOL! Aging, dying etc are all BIG concepts to grasp, and if you are led by M's questions, and dont make it a big taboo, I'm sure he will learn to manage his fears soon. Now, how can I stop E from having nightmares that the house is going to burn down....? Parenting - one long challenge!

 I have similar conversations with my boys (6 and 9) after our cat (18 years old) My wifes farther and my brother in law all died in a matter of years. They would get worried even when we got a cold as they thought we were getting sick and going to die. 

I explained that we all die some time but most of the time we get sick and get better again. There are lots of ways to die buty their are lots of things we can do to help us not to die before our time. Sometimes things happen that we cannot help (car accident resulting from bad choices of other people, freak accidents or acts of nature) so we must make sure that we are happy and good for as much of the time we are alive.

I also say that I hope I do get old and die as this means that I didn't die before my time.

Things we can do to help us get old and die include;

1. Eating your vegies, fruits and having at one red, orange or item in your meals.

2. Always be aware and carfull when out in the street, crossing the road, driving the car etc.

3. Don't drink or swallow stuff that reduces our ability to make good choices.

4. Don't hang out with other people who make bad choices, or drink and swallow stuff that reduces thier ability to make good choices.

5. Build a network of good and helpfull friends that will help you through life and keep you in a good frame of mind and happy and healthy.

6. Try to use every part of your body every day and these parts will keep working longer making getting old much nicer.

7. Listen to grown ups, find a favorite you can trust and ask them lots of questions because the know lots of things. Think about what they before you make some choices.

I tell them it is wonderful to get old and die but you have to protect and look after your body to make sure it is in good nick so you can enjoy being old.

This is tricky to deal with and I don't think there is a right and wrong way. On Xmas eve we all went to visit my nan and grandys grave to lay flowers and a wreath for Xmas. James and Luke are 10 and are just as 'fascinated' with death now as they were at 5 and 6. They are quite graphic though and Luke said, 'I don't want to be buried with the ants and spiders so you'd better burn me.' Then James said, 'If I died would you come and see me here every day? I think it was said by both my boys in total innocence but it upset me for quite a while.

Death is a part of life as much as living but it is one of those subjects that is so difficult to talk about.

When my nan died, they were 7. We didn't let them go to the funeral but instead they wrote letters to her and placed them in a bottle. We threw the bottles into the sea. We also bought helium ballons from them both and they attached photos to them and let them go 'to Heaven' so nanna could see them. They still talk about it but because it wasn't as full on as a funeral it helped them deal with her death much better.

Yah, that's a tough one! We had all our family pass when our kiddies were very young and it changes them. Some of our kiddies seemed more sensitive to it than others.  Probably a good thing that you can approach the topic with a rabbit instead of a treasured being.  I found it affected them all just some didn't voice it,  good he is getting it all out.

In time he will grasp how time is a longer concept than just today or tomorrow. 

As you may remember my brother died in 2007 and this brought it to be a constant thought in E's head though the concept had cropped up slightly previously.  To some degree it is still there most of the time, but she is mostly more reassured now that she has a slight inkling of how we grow old first and all that.  Hopefully that will sink in for proper over the next year!!! lol 

Hang in there.  It can seem obsessive, but it is just learning about the fact that while we are not here forever we will not disappear tomorrow.  The best thing is he knows you love him, and this will be a great part in reassuring him. 

Peace
EF.x

awww bless him i hope he forgets about this soon xxx