I’m back, only briefly.  Thankyou to all the minti members out there for your compassion and understanding.  You have all been so supportive.

I have been away for a little while to sort through a few things.  I decided to stop my minti time for a little while, because I had to focus on other things and I know that minti can be very addictive- the more I read and write, the more I have to read and write!!!

So what did I miss? Any births? Weddings? (??DA, LOL), catastrophes? Triumphs?

 

Well this is what I have been up to:

-working, as usual.

-saw the lawyer and found out that I would no longer be able to afford my house after settlement.

-went through a short grieving process about losing my dream home and the kids stability.

- had a valuer come to value my home and found out that the structural damage in my home was more severe than we first thought.  I then got a building inspector in to do a proper assessment.  He said this is only the second house in 15 years that he has seen deteriorate so rapidly (he inspected the house when we moved in 4 years ago).  It just wasn’t built properly and the footings are inadequate.  The house is only 15 years old!

- trying to get the builder to come and fix it, may have to go through court if they are not cooperative since it should still be covered under their structural warranty.

-started house hunting to check out the market- don’t get much for your money these days.

-had nothing but trouble trying to get the bank to give me a general idea of how much I could borrow on my own, they eventually gave me a tentative figure to work on.

-the kids have been sick.  I think Lachlan had swine flu.

-I was contacted by occ health and safety saying that I had a swine flu exposure at work and ended up on tamiflu.

-Imogen broke her finger.  Charlotte accidently dropped her terracotta pot plant on Imogen’s hand.  I took her straight to the GP, who said that she was still moving her finger and using it so it probably wasn’t broken.  Told me on this Wednesday to wait until Friday and if it was still swollen get an x ray.  She cried all afternoon, even with regular panadol and I knew something was not right- she has a very high tolerance to pain and never complains.  After a night on painstop we were at the hospital first thing in the morning, x ray and confirmed middle left finger fractured in 4 places (2 on the proximal phalange and 2 on the middle phalange).  It was one of those incidents where you just can’t get the words “put that down” out fast enough!

-I have bee trying to keep the house as spotless as possible with all the various inspections.

-still playing netball twice a week.

-I am now an aunty.  My sister in law gave birth to a baby girl, 8 ½ weeks early but all are doing well.

-I have been spending a lot of time with a calculator, working out budgets and financial stuff.  I think we will be OK!

 

What I am thankful for

-         that Charlotte’s asthma was well controlled on her preventers when she got sick (I thought she was going to end up in hospital once she caught what Lachlan had).

-         Through all this I haven’t been sick once- And I have been exposed to just about every bug imaginable through home and work.

-         Listening to mother’s instinct and not waiting 3 days to get an x ray on Imogen.  I know my baby and I know that she wasn’t alright.  Just goes to show that just because a child is still moving and using a hand doesn’t mean that its not broken.

-         I am thankful that Imogen has a high pain threshold and has been coping very well with her broken finger.  She’s no sook.

-         I’m too busy to crash into a heap.

-         My tax time bonus came just at the right time.

-     Meeting and having our photo taken with cricketer Darren Lehmann at the hospital.  He was in promoting the new PED treatment rooms.  Imogen and I may be in the newspaper.  She’s famous at the age of 14 months!

-         The ex has been cooperative with all my requests with the house issues.

-         I have great supports and friends.

-         Now that I am over the initial grief over my house, I can focus on building a new home for the 4 of us, that is ours.

-         I am really thankful that I am strong enough to deal with all of this, and I know that I will only be given what I can handle.  I am thankful that I am organized and rational.

-         I haven’t broken down once- maybe I am suppressing, maybe I am in denial…..who knows!  Maybe I am just waiting for the right time.

 

The future

Get house fixed

Do some work on the house ready for sale

Buy a new home, hopefully nearby, so the kids don’t have to move school and childcare

Slow down and live again.

I was thinking I might buy a cheap Tarago after everything settles and take the kids, mum, dad and my sister on a family holiday.

 

I am still busy, and wont have much time to respond.  But I just thought I would throw in an update to let everyone know that, even with all the shit….I am still alive! (and I can still find the positives in my world).  I do read all comments, and appreciate them, and eventually I will get around to responding.

 

Love to everyone.

Xx josie

 

I have to disappear for a while.  sorry guys but I have some things to take care of.

1- I am probably going to lose my home when the settlement goes through.  With the rates and mortgage as it is at present i can afford to stay here, but when he gets his payout of his percentage he is entitled to i wont be able to afford to stay.  I have to leave my dream home for something cheaper and uproot the kids. (found this out yesterday)

2- I have some major structural issues with the home that i have to get fixed before i try to sell it (i am hoping that it is still covered under the structural warranty of the house so that I don't have to fork out many thousands to get it fixed). (found this out today)

3- i have to get the house ready for sale and find a new place to live.

4- going through the process of agreeing on settlement.

5- amongst the usual work and kids stuff, charlotte needs extra time spent on her for speech pathology homework and all 3 are still sick with the yucky cough.

trying not to have a nervous breakdown at this point.  baby steps.  dealing with one thing at a time. all while Mr no-responsibility gets to sit back and relax, occassional visits with the kids, can do whatever the hell he likes after work and not have to worry about any of this stuff (while i am paying for lawyers and building inspectors and valuers etc), and in the end get a nice sum of cash given to him.  whatever doesn't kill you only makes you stronger, right?

i'll be back when things settle down a bit.

I have 3 sick kids.  today i wish there was more than one of me.

Lachlan has missed the last 2 days of kindy- his temp didn't get below 39 all day yesterday, even with panadol, with a chunky cough.  He spewed in his bed last night and ended up in bed with me.

Charlotte now has a bad cough as well, without the temp, but with her asthma these things always hit her hard.  she has also vomited a couple of times (once in my bed during a cough, and then all over nme when she was sitting in my lap....ick).

Now Imogen is hot and sounds like she has a sore throat- miserable and sitting on my lap as I type....waiting for the panadol to kick in.

Certainly back to reality after my night off at the pink concert.  I never really had a chance to recover.

Lucky the weather is nice so I can wash all the bed sheets.

Last night I went to my first ever concert.  P!NK.  It was brilliant. We were up the front, about 6 people from the stage and had a great view of everything.

I could sing at the top of my voice and no-one could hear me.  Great therapy- highly recommend it.

(Am having probs uploading photos.  I will save blog then go in to edit to add more photos in a minute- that usually works)

 

 

Yesterday the kids had an afternoon at daddy's house.  I am on holidays from work and I was guessing that since there was no 'need' for the kids to see their dad, that they probably wouldn't see him much the next 2 weeks.  so since it was daddy's weekend (my usual working weekend) they went to his house for the afternoon.  I said multiple times- "I will pick them up affter dinner" and left their pyjamas just in case he wanted to do the evening bath thing.

So after dinner I arrived at his place.  Knocked on the door.  No answer. knocked again, no answer.  maybe I'm not knocking load enough- knocked harder.  maybe he was busy changing a nappy- waited, knocked again.

Where the hell is he?  the lights are on.  Rang his mobile (my battery was about to go flat), no answer.  starting to panic now.  BANGED on the door.

then my phone rang.  it was him. "where the hell are you?" i said.  "i'm at your place" he says.  "what part of I'll pick them up after dinner didn't you understand".  GGGRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!

ANYWAY, thats over and done with now.  I'm on holidays and I am kid-free tomorrow.  I'm going to do my tax in the morning (YAY) and then have a massage after lunch (not suprisingly I have a knot of muscle tensing in the back of my neck thats giving me a headache), do some childfree shopping.  THEN I'M GOING TO THE PINK CONCERT to belt out my anthem (so what) LIVE!

I've never been to a concert before (sad, I know).

Gotta go and check on the kids- I can hear them raiding the fridge.

love to all

xx josie