I'm so sorry that you have to be put through this. I firmly believe(and totally act on) the antage that if you support someone they will give you their best. I totally had the mother in law from hell but realized it was her pain and disappointment in life that made her act out against everyone. You stand tall in the knowledge that you are doing the best for Lilly and she's perfect the way she is. You stand tall and deliver your rights!!! Say,I hope Lilly doesn't remember this criticising,negitivity is not how I'm bring her up. They are aware of what they're doing,it's meant to elevate them while putting you down so speak up and put an end to it for your sake and your daughters. It doesn't have to be explosive,just some well placed comments of your own that state how you expect and need to be treated in order to return. I'm thinking of you and Sweety, I'd welcome you in whatever you choose to be comfortable in!!!!

You're being too hard on yourself. She's not even a year old yet, and the average age for walking is 12 months. Some walk as early as 7 months I've seen it myself, which means that other must walk much later than 12 months to make that the average.  If people are going to be judging you and questioning everything you do as a parent, you need to prepare yourself with some answers.  I took her to see my grandmother (her great-grandmother) when she was having her 1st birthday. I knew she would criticise me so I was prepared for it.  She asked if I had a man in my life and I told her I didn't need one, I have enough money for us both and I have a vibrator so what use would a man be? She had no response to that.  She criticised me on all sorts of things because we were still co-sleeping and I was still breastfeeding her at the time. Even though she had water from a cup, I didn't tend to take it places so I would offer her the breast instead if she was thirsty.  Boy did I cop it for still breastfeeding her! "When my children were 6 months old I had them on Sunshine powdered milk and it never hurt them..." well you know how it is.  So long as you know she is beautiful and you are doing a good job with her, just ignore them. I tell it like it is then end it with "If you don't like it then you can make different decisions for your children" then leave it at that.