Amnesia: The condition that enables a woman who has gone through labor to make love again.

Feedback: The inevitable result when your baby doesn't appreciate the pureed carrots.

Full name: What you call your child when you're really mad at him.

Grandparents: The people who think your children are wonderful even though they're sure you're not raising them right.

Hearsay: What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.

Impregnable: A woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.

Independent: How we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.

Ow: The first word spoken by children with older siblings.

Puddle: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes and socks into it.

Show off: A child who is more talented than yours.

Sterilize: What you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it.

Two minute warning: When your baby's face turns red and she begins to make those familiar grunting noises