Had a text this lunchtime from the Lady who interviewed me for the local radio a couple of months back

Its being aired on Monday !!!!!!

Could be interesting LOL...........

Made another giant leap today, I was working in the school hall, when one of my colleagues came in and said to make sure I stayed indoors out of the way as the school next door, (access to this school by vehicle is through the playground of our school !!!) had a child needing medical attention and an ambulance was on the way !!!!! In the past this would have had me running into the store cupboard seeing that x is an ambulance man and still following me around !!!!! Today I decided that I didn't care, I finished my work then made my way to the playground just as the Ambulance arrived !!!!! And I really didn't care!!!!

As it happens it wasn't him, but I didn't know that at the time so I am going to give myself a pat on the back for that !!!! haha

I'll accept pats from anyone who knows what a major thing this is for me, .......... even funnier is that I went to my parents after school and didn't even mention it, it was such a non event that I forgot, I only remembered now as Daniel and I were driving through town and an ambulance passed us !!! So sorry Mum you'll have to read about it here

Tonight is going to be a long evening................ was so tired this late afternoon haven't been sleeping well lately but its all good its not stress related, actually I think I'm enjoying life so much that I just stay up all hours not wanting the day to end LOL, so anyway I came home with the boys made a cup of tea and sat down to watch Nadal playing tennis...........I woke up over an hour later !!!!!!!!!!!

My boys have done so well this week with their Sporting passions

A little while ago Thomas was asked to help out at a Football Tournament, his friend invited him to go as his team mate was not able to play and they needed an extra player. When Thomas got there, he was actually asked to play for a completely different team that went on to win the whole tournament, so he was very happy !!!! At the end of the day the Coach asked Thomas for his phone number.

This week he had a call from the Coach to say they wanted Thomas back in the team permanently. He has even got a small contract saying he wants to be in the team. he is really pleased.

If you knew my Thomas, he is a confident but extremely laid back 14 year old who takes life pretty much how it comes and you rarely see him getting over excited about anything. If he wants you to know he is happy about anything, the usual response is the one word "Cool !!!" Well when the contract came in the post which looks pretty basic and un complicated, we had a "Thats so cool !!!" So I think he is pretty ecstatic LOL

Yesterday Daniel was in a local schools Basketball tournament, he was very keen and very excited, Daniel is the complete opposite to Thomas, he refuses to use one word answers when 150 words will do (can't think where he gets that from) so all week I have heard just about every detail of how he was going to play, who was in the team, how excited he was...................

I collected him from school last night and he was thrilled to tell me that his team came 2nd in the tournament, but the best news for him was that he was given a certificate by the organisers as being "The most valued player of the tournament!!!"

Have you any idea what it does to the confidence of a child like my Daniel to be linked to the word "Valued" I believe he has grown an extra foot with how high he is holding his head up. I could not have written a better script for him.

What an awesome word "VALUED"  One of the biggest confidence boosters in the English Dictionary .

So here is one very proud Mum of her two boys

Hi Everyone

Just thought I would introduce myself as the new ME!!!!!!!!!

Finally at this stage of my life, I know who I am, I know where I have been and I know where I want to be going !!!!!

I havent told hardly anyone but several weeks ago whilst all the mediation crap was going on I made a decision to stop taking my medication !!! It was a bit scary but I felt as long as I was taking anti depressants it was like I was still allowing ( ) to have some kind of say on my life and my decisions.

I didn't do it by the recommended way, as in going to the doctor but decided I just wasn't going to take them. This could have been dangerous and its not the best way of stopping but for me I was so determined, it worked !!!!

I have not taken any anti depressants for about 2 months now and I feel great. I am in total control of my emotions, I have had some huge issues to deal with and I have COPED fine !!!!!!!

Not even my parents knew I was stopping the meds, I just surprised them one day with the news that I hadn't taken any for several weeks, had they noticed a difference in me?????? They hadn't so I KNEW I was going to be ok

This has been the total and undeniable proof to me that I was never insane, I was never mentally unbalanced, I was never having a breakdown. It was all HIM

So this is ME, I like ME, I hope my friends will always like ME, I KNOW my family like ME and LOVE me, Even my distant son deep down, he loves me, if he had no feelings for me he wouldn't be confused right now, he can't talk to me because he doesn't want to hurt me deep down. Otherwise where are the abusive emails from him asking me to leave him alone???? I KNOW he LOVES me

Daniel is now 11

he was 11 on Monday and was spoilt rotten...........but who cares ??????

Thomas and I gave him a Basketball stand, as he dreams of being a famous Basketball player for his favourite team LA LAKERS

He had some great pictures and I thought I would share some of the best pictures on here

His grandparents bought his a Transformer Bumblebee MP3 Speaker set, which as you see from the smile he was VERY happy with

His uncle gave him the LA Lakers kit, I love this picture as it captures his pleasure in a great way

Of course every child has to have a Birthday Cake and as there were no Basketball cakes around, Daniel was more than happy with the Simpsons

Finally, Daniel happy to pose in the LA LAKERS kit, holding the Lakers ball from his sister and BF, next to the Basketball stand from Thomas and I

All equals one happy boy !!!!!!!

Its Daniels birthday tomorrow and he will be 11 but as he will be at school all day, I let him have his birthday treat a day early !!!!!! OK so it was my treat too

Thomas, Daniel, my brother Marc and I drove to London, where I had pre booked tickets to see the Dr Who exhibition at Earls Court. We are all devout Dr Who fans so we were all excited. At least I think we all were, Thomas always plays down all emotions, if he says its cool then he is extremely excited !!!!!!!

In the foyer of the exhibition is a model of the Tardis so that was Daniels first photo call !!!!!

The first "chamber" were the shop mannequins from the 1st episode with Christopher Eccleston as the Dr. Not a good omen for me, as it was clearly shop dummies and I was positive I saw one move and was terrified, jumped out of my skin and yelped !!!   much to the embarrassment of the boys and my brother !!!!!

The exhibition is set up really well and it kind of runs from chamber to chamber with most episodes covered. After the "scary" mannequins we were met by a talking model of everyones favourite Dr Who..........David Tennant !!!!!

Thomas was clearly reluctant to pose by the models..............(yawn 14 years old and acting it too !!!!) however I did manage to convince him to please let me take at least one picture !!!!!! We settled on this one of both boys in front of the Face of Boe.

We saw mock ups of prosthetics from various "monsters" from the series, really clever how they make them I have to say, and just about every character you can imagine from the recent three series of Dr Who.

Naturally the best is saved for the end but before we get to the "you know whats !!!" we were met up the Cybermen, again Daniel was more than happy to pose next to these threatening creatures

After a few more harmless monsters we met the Daleks, that in itself was quite funny, as they are probably one of the most scary sci fi monsters, I asked Daniel to stand in front of one of them, and the funniest thing happened as the Dalek came to life with a light show and two more emerged with the immortal words "Exterminate !!!!" Daniel literally jumped off the floor and we had to laugh at him. I did get a great pic of him later though.

We decided to go and get some lunch and ended up in the McDonalds by Picadilly Circus, then walked up Regent Street to Hamleys Toy Store, there are 7 floors of toys here so the rule was to cover each floor level by level and if we got separated no one went up or down a floor until we were altogether again. This was a great plan and worked really well, It was great, there are demos of some of the toys on each floor and the boys loved it.

Finally we caught the tube back to the car park and I drove home.

We have had a fantastic day and all decided we want to do the same day again in August when my brother, sister in law, nephew and niece are over from Iceland. It will be great !!!! Just maybe Sylvie and I can accidentally slip away and do some decent shopping of our own too

After the drama of my outfit yesterday, you would think that today I would get it right........

WRONG !!!!!!!

Today I forgot my jeans and flatties so I ended up in the school field supervising 500 kids wearing  smart trousers and heels that I wear to the hospital !!!!!!

Heels on field duty by the way is a complete no no

I got to work and the other ladies were saying "look at you all dressed up !!!"

I was like "Grrrrr Don't talk about it, my jeans are neatly folded by the front door ready to put in the car !!!!!!"

Oh well I'll try again tomorrow

xxx

Today at lunchtime my work colleagues actually laughed at me !!!!!

I was stood in the playground in my t shirt, jeans, flip flops/thongs, sunglasses.........and............my parka coat with the hood up.

I WAS FREEZING !!!!!

Crazy me this morning dressed for a June day and it turned into being closer to a February day !!!!!!!!! Why have I not learnt my lesson yet about the un predictable English weather............Oh wait a minute !!!!!!!! I did learn.......thats why my parka was in the car

I almost had a run in today with an articulated lorry !!!! To be fair I was away in my thoughts worrying about Daniel and what kind of day he had at school as when I dropped him at school this morning he told me that he had decided he was going to ignore his "dad" for 9 weeks then rip his heart out and stamp on like his dad had done to him!!!!!!!!

Anyway just before the village on the way to Daniels school, I already had Thomas with me, and the road leads to a narrow railway bridge on a sharp blind corner, fortunately I saw the lorry coming so stopped, he didn't and came fast around the corner on my side of the road !!!!!!!!!!!! I had an angel watching over us tho as there was nothing behind us I slammed my car into reverse and just about got out of the way. Thomas and I then looked at each other and went "Whoo that was tooooo close !!!!" I'm so glad no one was following because if I hadn't have been able to reverse I am fairly confident it would have been rather ugly !!!!!!

Talk about out of the mouth of babes.............Daniel has told all his teachers about his "horrible" weekend !!!!!!! I guess we have no secrets when he is about LOL

xxx

Daniel had another email today explaining why he hasn't heard anything for 9 weeks...........

Its because he is honouring Daniels request for a break !!!!!!!

Of course, why didn't we think of that ?????

Don't know if anyone remembers but I did blog at the time of the last communication weeks ago, that he asked Daniel how long the break was going to go on for, at which Daniel told him, that seeing he was there at the wrestling with him it was obviously over, to which his dad said he was expecting an email the next day to say the break was back on !!!!!

Well Daniel NEVER sent that email, instead he has spent 9 weeks wondering why his dad has been ignoring him !!!!! Well all I can say now is Daniel at first was gutted and went and lay on the sofa under a blanket sobbing, that his dad was blaming him !!!!! However as the day has gone on he is now furious that his dad once again has taken no responsibilty at all. Apparently Daniel says he can now go and stuff himself !!!!!!!!!

Do you remember that back in May 2006 I got a job in the local hospital, a few months later he got a job in the same hospital, which totally freaked me out

Then in June 2007 I was moved to a lovely little town and we wouldn't tell him the address, but then a few months later he became the Paramedic/Technician for that town, which totally freaked me out

Well the news he has sprung on Daniel today in his email is that he has now moved house and lives in OUR TOWN !!!! Grrrrr this time I am not freaked out at all, I kind of expected this, BUT I will be logging this with my solicitor in case I ever need to one day get that restraining order.

WHAT A JERK, LOSER, PSYCHO, PATHETIC EXCUSE FOR A MALE

In the last 10 days I have also crossed paths with my one time best friend 3 times, the first occasion Amy and I drove past her and she had the gall to wave at us but I drove past, the 2nd time was yesterday I was parked outside Thomas's school and she was 2 cars away but I ignored her and finally today went into town with Thomas and Daniel and we passed her in the market.

If anyone thinks I am harsh with her, as far as I am concerned, she can say all she likes that she wanted to help us both but ultimately she listened to me for gossip and then reported to him and helped him, besides if she was taken in by him then that could only happen by her assuming I was telling lies !!!!!!

I'm actually proud of myself with the way I am coping these days

xxx

Yesterday Daniel came home from school announcing he had had his first of a course of sex education talks !!!!

He also said that his teacher asked them all if there is someone they could talk to if they had questions, most of the boys said their dad but Daniel told his teacher, he doesn't contact his dad so he would be talking to Thomas !!!!!

Great !!!!!!! Can you imagine the questions LOL

Anyway in the evening he says he is going to have a bath now every morning and every night, because he now knows he is becoming a man and that will mean he will sweat more !!!!!!!!!

Also he told me that they had been making Fathers Day cards, (its Fathers Day here in the UK on Sunday) so I told him that was nice, did he want to post the card to try and see his dad?????

His answer " Nah, I didn't make one for him I made one for Grandad !!!!"

Having said that Daniel finally had an email today !!!!!!!!!!!! Yes I know I fainted almost

Daniel apparently emailed him first but didn't mention it, so his dad answered saying how lovely it was to hear from him and how much he misses him and how much he loves both boys !!!!!!!

Daniel answered " Yea I can tell, its nine weeks since you contacted me !!!!! Of course he told his dad he loves him but he also told me that nothing has changed and he doesn't want to see him !!!!!"

I'm actually proud of him that he is controlling this so well

xxx