It is now exactly five minutes past eight in South Africa, Durban.

Today I realised again what joys the little things in life can bring us only if we allow ourselves to have fun and still enjoy what nature has to offer us. Especially spending a day with my adorable angel at the zoo....

The first time I took him to see live animals was when he was only 7months old. Although he enjoyed it he did not really understand about animals yet.

Well today was totally different!!! I am so glad I accepted the offer from my friend to take us to the zoo. At first the day started off miserable it was raining and cloudy and not too warm to enjoy the outdoors. But as the day progressed it became very open and sunny and alot of fun.  Firstly (because of the rain) took him to see the dangerous creatures where we saw snakes of all kinds, lizzards, and crocodiles. He even got the opportunity to touch a birmese python. I was more nervous than him coz he was laughing and smiling and called out mommy snake ssssssssss. I was overjoyed!!!

Then as it got a bit warmer I took him to see the lions and tigers and even took him to the little petting zoo where there was a lecture about panthers. And once again he got to see and touch a panther upclose. His face lit up with joy and my heart melted when he look at me and said mommy grrrrrr goes lions!

After seeing all the animals and having a lunch at the zoo and eating alot of candy we decided it was time to go home and let the little one get some rest. We just started driving out of the gates and he was lights out nite nite. I felt like I must be doing something right if he can recognize animals without me telling him what it before he says it!

So after today I once again really really know its the little things in life that can make us happy.

As some of you may know I am a single mother of my little angel of two and a half years old.

I still ive with my parents and I dont know if that may be a cause of some of the problems I am experiencing with my son. I am trying my best to find a good job to be able to provide for him myself again, but it seems like no matter what I do I wont ever get respect from them.

Ever since my son was born everything I did became a very big issue for everyone at home. I am under alot of stress. Like for example when I need to go shower after a long day out jobhunting, they give me a certain time that I MUST be finished in. Or when i need to use the bathroom (nature calls) they refuse to look after my son for that ten of fifteen minutes and i have to take him with me. I feel that, that is not a very good  thing for my son. He is not going to be two forever and everytime he goes to the bathroom with me he wants to look at my private parts and no matter how i explain to him that boys dont look at girls private parts it doesnt help coz he has to go to bathroom with me.

Another problem that has been surfacing: I have always been the one to impliment the dicipline. And the method i was using is time outs and rewards for doing good. He has a schedule that i always try to stick to. When I worked I always asked them to stick to this or else he might be confused by the two sets of diciplining. Now i noticed lately that they dont use the time outs but instead give him hidings.... And also when i give him time outs they come and take him out of his naughty zone (which is a chair). He now ignores me completely when he does something wrong and needs a time out.

Also when I say no to something like having a sip of my wine he goes to my sister or father and askes them and they allow him to drink wine. I do not want him drinking alcohol at his age. My sister is his godmother but is it right for her to also teach my son to say bad words and then laugh about it and when i tell him that we do not ssay naughty words and that they are not nice he just ignores me more and more. 

He goes to them for comfort and to get his way. Am i being to strict on him that he does that? Or is it just a case of him getting confused by the two sets of rules that he has at the moment?

I honestly dont feel that leaving him in their care when i start working again would be the best thing for my son. I really really want to put him in a daycare centre to get the right care when I am not home.

What is a single, currently umemployed mother to do?

My two year old had the phase of biting me and other people for about six months. I was very frustrated at this. Another parent told me to give him salt in his mouth or bite him back, but honestly i couldn't get that over my heart as i didn't want to hurt him, coz that might show him that hurting someone is actualy okay. So i went and looked it up on the internet for some advise as to what to do about the problem and i found this piece of advice from the website parenting.com. It has been really useful to me as to how to take on the problem so i thought to share it with other moms seeking advise on biting. hope it helps

xxx

It may seem as if you're living with Dracula's daughter, but nope  -- it's just a day with your toddler, who has now entered a biting phase. In most cases, your tiny terror will stop biting once she learns to speak more, and grows more teeth. This phase will pass within a few months, so don't fret.

Reason for biting: Teething  -- biting down makes her gums feel better.
What to do: Offer her a soft teething toy or wet washcloth.

Reason for biting: Frustration  -- lacking language skills, she bites when she can't say what she wants.
What to do: Try to offer the right word. Tell her that biting is not okay, and give her something else to chew.

Reason for biting: Attention  -- unable to speak, she'll try to engage her peers by taking a chunk out of them.
What to do: Model the words for her ("You'd like to play with Sabrina"), and remind her that biting is wrong.

Reason for biting: Anger  -- toddlers are notorious for temper tantrums. Biting may occur during one of these fits.
What to do: Remove your little hothead from the situation; give the no-biting talk once she's cooled down.

This morning started off really well with my son. I gave him a bath and we had fun playing and splashing in the water with all his toys. He was so very loving towards me that it made my heart melt in my chest. Its days like these that i really appreciate him. He has been my only bright light through a terrible time after the break-up.

Alot of people always said to me 'be careful, he is going to be a handfull'. Well today i just say he is my little handful and i love him more than what words can describe. People also used to say that i wont be a fit mother and that being a single mother would not be the best thing for my son. For months i believed what they told until one day his dad beat me up when he was only three months old. He wal laying in the cot and sleeping. I felt so bad that it had to have happened in front of my son that i sat down that evening thinking about everything. I told myself it would be the best thing for my son to rather have a single mother raise him as i didn't want him to live in an unhappy, abusing home. I broke off everything with his dad and his dad refused to see him afterwards. I just found that he was a much happier baby after the breakup because i had the chance to be happy again and to laugh again.

I sit here today not regretting a single thing and not regretting being a single mother to a very active, healthy, two year old boy. In a way i thank his dad for giving me such a beautiful son and in a way i thank him for if it wasnt for him i would not have opened my eyes to what kind of person he was becoming and i thank him for letting me go to give my son the best life i could possibly offer.

xxx