I lost my daughter for the first time today!  Never lost my son in 6 years, but she just vanished.  I have to admit, though, that I was at a model railway expo and there were lots of people, everywhere.  At first I stayed calm and just thought that she wouldn't go too far.  But she has been going much further away from us than before.  I walked back and forward almost looking under womens dresses becoming more desperate and more concerned that some train-loving peadoiphile would have known that this was a target-rich environment.  Right then I heard on the loudspeaker that a child had been found.  But I couldn't hear the description and knew that my daughter couldn't say her name.  I tried to regain calm.  I know from cognitive psychology that panic reduces sensory skills and in particular peripheral vision.  When we get stressed we become less able to identify different objects.  We can even convince ourselves that an object is not there, when it's staring us in the face.  Stay calm and keep your percepction broad. She's only very short, wearing pink.  Everyone's wearing pink!  I also felt that sense of pride.  "OF course, I haven't lost my daughter.  I'm careful and she's well behaved."  Screw, pride.  Where's the office?  I arrive at the desk and everyone in front of me is asking pathetic questions about how to find the toilets and can they buy a raffle ticket.  "I surrounded by uncaring idiots," I scream to myself.  Then I feel someone grab my leg at toddler height.  My daughter is right next to me and a kind woman saying that she found her admiring the pies and sausage rolls in the cafe.  She didn't seem worried at all, but something about her made her think that she was lost.  She gave me that look.  "Father, out with the kids for a day.  Can't even do that part properly.  Can't even keep his 2 year old daughter under control.  Probably got his head down in some magazine or discussion the finer points of an HO diesel locomotive."  Anway, I was damn glad to see her.  But 30 minutes later she was off again.  This time, I did keep more of an eye on her.  Can't let them out of your sight, is all I'll say.

 

Wombat

I watched SuperNanny with my wife and daughter last night. My daughter had an angry expression on her face the entire way through. I wasn't quite sure what she didn't like! It's amazing how each episode is very similar from the next. Almost the same recipe. I'm not taking anything away from her. She is very good at training parents. She shows them what they are doing wrong, models correct behavior, teaches to see things differently, explored emotional blockages, problems in the mum-dad relationship. It almost always amazing. But it also shows that there are a tips that work in lots of different situations. I was also impressed how she surfaced the mothers unconscious feelings of guilt towards her youngest child that was a problem birth. Often unconscious things hide behind the scenes impacting on our behaviour, no matter how much we try to hide it. Seeing ghosts is a common problem for parent-child relationships, and relationships in general. Only by confronting ghosts, can we stop their influence on our behaviour and the quality of our relationships.

My wife went to work for the first time in 4 years today. Dad took over the home. I've done it before, but there is still that sensation of an enormous abyss opening up in front of me after she has left the house. What should I do? I have to think of something. We've got nothing planned. What would be a good thing to do? My 6-yr old son is on holidays too. I know that if you don't get oof to a good start that you have problems the rest of the day. Spend time with them early, then they are happier. We did the cricket thing while I set up the cubby-house for my daughter to play in in the garage, since it was raining. That went well. After lunch, my son showed interest in all the symbols on the music. What do they mean? What does 4/4 mean? I tried to teach him about rhythm and counting. What the different symbols mean? That it's a special language. I really enjoyed teaching him about something that is a big part of my life. After a couple of hours of work, while he played and my 2yrold daughter slept, we played more cricket and football. Then they played well together while I made dinner. We ate early and then watched the sports news with both of them lying on me in the bean-bag. It was really cuddly and nice. Just me and the kids. It was also nice cause I was almost near the end of the day. Mum came home late--didn't even ring to say she was late. Anyway, it was good to be reminded of what life is like as a full-time mother. We will be sharing the child caring from now on. I work 2-3 days a week and my wife the other couple of days. I think it could be really good. It was fantastic to have such a nice time with the kids. Bit tired tonight though.

Wombat