When you read all the baby magazines, which, lets face it, most of us do religiously when we find out we are pregnant, they will give you lists of things you will need for your baby and tell you you need to have six months income saved up and having 

a baby becomes a very stressful idea....  For years I put it off thinking we couldn't afford it, until the desire to have my own baby outweighed the concerns.  Yes, it would be ideal to have six months income saved and all debts paid off before baby comes, but let's be realistic and say that for many of us this will not happen and we have to make the best of our situation.

First, we need to be realistic - look at your budget. Work out what is essential and what is not.  For example, for me, pay tv was not essential - while handy for late night feeds, it was an expense we could do without.  If you can cut things out that aren't essential (and do leave some room for entertainment or you will go nuts), can you pay this on one income?  If not, are there things you can change (eg moving to a cheaper house) or can you negotiate a flexible work arrangement - eg part-time work, work from home etc...  Again, be realistic about how much you really need and also about your options - working from home is not a breeze with small children and if going back to work you need to factor in child-care etc...  Also, bear in mind whether you will receive any government benefits (and you can usually check this online).

Next, have a look at the things you will need.  What you will need can come down often to choice.  There are some things you have to buy and buying new may be safer - eg car seats &  a mattress.  However there are many other things that are optional and can be done without if you wish.  I give you an example of a friend of mine.  Due to economic necessity - and choice - she breastfed her baby, used a pouch rather than a pram, kept her baby in her bed and used cloth nappies.  Her "baby" costs were minimal.  Not everyone agrees with her choices - and that is where you need to decide what matters most to you. 

How will you feed?  Do you need to buy bottles and sterilisers (can be handy, from experience, even if you plan to breastfeed)?  Will your baby go straight in a cot or do you need a bassinet as well?  What sort of nappies will you use?  Will you use a pram or a pouch (or both)?  The choices are many and a friend who has had children may be able to help you go through some of the choices - or the lists the magazines give you.  Some things I would not buy until later (when they are needed) and some things you may just wait and see if you need before buying.  Also, can I just say that babies grow very quickly and do not need masses of clothes - many will never be worn!

Once you have your list of needs, look creatively at how you can get them.  Some people will just go and buy new everything they need - not many of us can afford to do that. Even with the baby bonus, there may be other things you want to spend the money on - an independent midwife, paying off a debt, a second car etc....

So, look at what  you have.  Are there friends or family you can get hand me downs from?  I bought a whole package from a work colleague - pram, cot, clothes, sheets, steriliser etc... for about $200 - as her youngest child was now 3 and she was not having any more.  I also got some things from my sister in law - a change table, high chair, sheepskin, clothes and much more.  I know at playgroup we often share hand me downs and sometimes we are looking for new mums to share with.  Maybe stick a sign up at your local post office or look up your local playgroup and ask.  I have even had requests for things from mums through our local baby clinic and doctor's surgery.  Look up freecycle.

Then you can start looking for second hand things to buy - through ebay, your local second hand shop, classifieds in the paper, garage sales.  The choices are endless.  The only warning I have is to make sure that what you are buying is safe - check it meets your countries standards - in Australia there is a website you can look up to make sure and a little sticker on items that meet the requirements.  Clean everything when you  get it and if you want to repaint it make sure it is ready by about 36weeks as that will give it time to air before baby comes (and remember some babies do come early - as I found out!).

You may  have a baby shower before baby comes and this could be a good time to point out things that you really need, and ask  family and good friends to get them for you.  You do get given a lot of stuff, so it's great if you can make them things you really need.

If all these options haven't worked for you and there are still items you need to buy new, then can I say 2 things - layby and sales.  You have on average about 7 months to gather what you need - that is plenty of time to check out prices in different stores, decide what you need and put things aside on layby.  If you have already done your homework you can grab stuff in the sales knowing it is what you really need and not an impulse.  It is hard to avoid impulse shopping with baby things as they are so cute, but just be sensible about your budget and needs.  And remember, not everything has to be ready when baby comes home - some things (like high chairs, prams, larger clothes, toys, even a cot) can be bought a few months down the track when you actually need them.

And remember as so many of the older generation told me, what babies really need is you - they can do without a lot of things and never be any wiser as long as you give them lots of love.  Give them the basics - food, clothes & somewhere to sleep, and lots of cuddles.

OK, so there's my few hints.  I'll add a few links and finish up, but please feel free to leave a comment below if you can think of anything else to help new mums wade through those lists of what they really "need".