I have spent a lot of time on Minti as of late, and it has been an honor being able to learn about and share a part of people's lives. I've read some incredible stories here. Stories of triumph, but also stories of pain. It to a few of those

to whom those stories belong that I want to address right now.

 This is for all the survivors of abusive parents, relatives, relationships or even total strangers. This is for those who know just how painful a parent's words can be, just how twisted people's thoughts can get, and just how evil evil is. This is for those who have overcome the trauma of the past, far away and recent. This is for those who feel so weak, yet are so strong.

 As parents, we will have to face challenges and struggles that other parents with "normal" pasts won't. We may struggle with our anger and temper more so then is usual. We may have to fight thoughts of inadequacy, and feel more unprepared then others. We may fear more for our children or have fears for our children that no one rightly should. We will try our hardest to break the mold and cycles of that which haunts us, but inevitably there will be times when we will lose.

 I cannot tell you how many days I found myself shut up in my room, desperately crying out to God for forgiveness. I had struck out in anger just like my dad did, or I used the same words I hated my mother using towards me. I have spent so many nights laying awake, worrying that I was going to fail my children just like my parents failed me. Worrying that my children would grow up to hate me. I tell you the truth, if it wasn't for my relationship with God and my ever-patient husband, I would not be as sane as I am today. (As disputed as that may be....) The thing of it is though, that by analyzing my behavior, being aware of it and asking for help when I need, I am being the kind of parent my children need. You, me, us by being here on this very website, we are making something better of ourselves as parents and as people. 

 I read your stories, I see your hearts. You desire a better life for your children, for other people. But you are not just desiring, you are not just writing, you are doing. Everyday you get up and love your kids, everyday you try to better yourself, every time you share your story so that someone else may find courage - you are making a better world for your kids. You are not weak because of what you have gone through, you are stronger because you survived it and lived to tell your story. Evil likes to be hidden in the dark. Pain is comfortable there. By stepping out and telling the truth, you are allowing good to win. Thank you.

 I urge you though, do not hold on to the pain and bitterness. Do not hold onto unforgiveness, it will only eat you up inside. If you need help, more than Minti can give, get it. Pray, get prayer. See a counselor or a psychiatrist. For those currently in a bad place, get out! Get help from a friend, trusted family member, or law enforcement. The best gift we can give our children is a healthy, loving, well-adjusted parent and home. 

Signing off.

-Philosopher13