Both my births were beautiful. My first was a long labour (3 days - no sleep), waters broke, contractions were slow to start, given medications to help induce stronger contractions, asked for an epidural(as I was exhausted - was sleeping between contractions) pushed for 2 hours, baby became distressed, forcept

delivery a beautiful baby boy was born.

For my second birth I really wanted a natural labour (no epidural) because I was really curious about what birth would feel like.  I was much less anxious (as most mums are second time around). All was going well, it was a long for a second labour (but still much shorter than my first) 17 hours.  But it was great.  I spent most of it in the shower, or hanging off my husband.

At 9 cm diallated I asked for some gas. It helped and gave me something to focus on. When the pushing started I stopped the gas and stood up to push the baby out. I had the sensation of a bowling ball resting on my pelvis and was having trouble pushing it out. After lots of pushing and still no baby the midwife asked me to lie down on the bed. 

I pushed and pushed and a little head eventually started coming out.  Then things went crazy!

The midwife got my husband to push the emergency button, all of a sudden there were about 10 people in the room around my bed, pulling the end of the bed off, pushing my knees up, pushing on my tummy, telling me to push, not push.  It was choas, but I still felt relaxed, not too worried. But the baby was STUCK.  It's shoulder was hooked behind my pubic bone and the head was being pulled back into me.

I remember saying at this stage "I don't care if I tear, just pull the baby out".  Glad they didn't because if they did he would have certainly get nerve damage to his stuck shoulder.

They tried several manouvers to get him out and finally one of the midwives reached inside me and pulled out the stuck shoulder and arm.  They put him on my tummy - I thought he was dead, he did not move. As soon as the cord was cut they took him behind the curtain.  I asked my husband if the baby was ok.  They were giving him oxygen.  Then within a few minutes they wrapped him in a blanket and brought him to me.  He was alive and well.  He was perfect.  And despite a bit of fuss at the end of the birth, and a big tear from when they got him out all was fine.

I recovered very quickly (much quicker than my first birth), bub had a bruised (purple) head for a few days, but was fine.

I later found out this is called shoulder dystocia - when the head is born, it gets pulled back in because the babies shoulder is stuck behind the pubic bone.  It is a very tricky situation.  If the bub is pulled, it can damage the nerves, but if they are not born quickly they can have brain damage due to a lack of oxygen. My bub's head came out and the rest of him was born 5 minutes later. Any longer and there could have been problems. Midwives are trained to detect this and act quickly

Shoulder dystocia is very rare - usually happens to bug bubs - mine was 9 pound 11 and a half (4.4kgs).  But it has also happened to a friend of mine with a smaller baby.

Not all births go to plan.  Even if you have a huge baby, that gets stuck, and a very big tear it is still possible to be completely happy with your birth.