Keeping a clean and organized family home- its psychological!
There are quite a few ways to keep your house under control. Time management is one of them, but I don’t believe that it’s the be all and end all solution to the never-ending mess that is
life with a family.
Over the years I have come to realize that, even though I have excellent time management skills (through my training and experience as a nurse working in major public hospitals, and mum of 3 kids) the control of my home is highly dependent on my psychological state at the time. I can have as many systems in place as there are housework jobs, but if my heart and mind isn’t in it, then they are not going to be successful.
Now I am no expert in the area of psychology/psychiatry, even though I do take a professional interest…..and my following thoughts are not based on any sound researched based evidence…..but I thought this might be interesting to those tackling the day to day chaos that is life with children.
Psychological factors that hinder my home control
~ What’s the point . Example: I’ve just vacuumed the lounge and someone comes along with a crumb-dropping biscuit, well what was the point in my effort in the first place. This feeling is quite common in my household. Doesn’t really make me inclined to clean it again.
~My partner’s effort (or lack there-of)
. If my partner is lazing around I might be inclined to not be as enthusiastic about busting my butt getting the house clean.
~Feeling sorry for myself 
- Sometimes daily life gets to being the same thing day in day out. Dealing with the kids, doing the chores, dealing with the kids, doing the chores etc etc. Sometimes I go in cycles of thinking that there must be something more to life, and the housework gets neglected in place of doing something fun for a change.
~Mood 
- Sometimes I am energetic and enthusiastic, other times I am lazy and slow. On my lazy days, very little housework gets done.
~Time with the kids 
- Often I will just crave some real quality time with the kids, without being distracted by chores. The sacrifice is the control of the home, but I think this one is worth it.
Psychological factors that help my home control
~Busy 
- “If you want something done- give it to a busy mum”. I don’t know who said this originally but it is so true. I can get more done in an hour between jobs during a busy day than I can in a whole day with nothing extra to do.
~Sick of the clutter
- Sometimes I just get to the point where enough’s enough. The clutter has to go and I have to reclaim control. This is usually the motivation for spring-clean mode.
~Music 
- I know that if I have things to do and I am lacking motivation that some up-beat music will soon get me moving. This usually starts with a bit of dancing around the lounge first, and then escalates into dusting, vacuuming etc. This is great fun to do with the kids.
~Being a martyr 
- When my partner is being lazy, I might get passive aggressive and stomp around the house cleaning just to prove a point- that I do heaps more than he does!!
~Comparisons to other mums’ houses
- Nothing is more motivating than going to the house of another busy mum and noticing how sparkling clean her house is. If her house can look like that with young kids, then mine can too.
~Pride
-Sometimes it’s just the sense of pride and achievement that I have in my home that motivates me to keep it looking its best.
~Visitors - your house may be as close to clean as it ever gets and you may still feel the need to say “excuse the mess” when visitors come. All it takes is for a phone call to say “we’re on our way over” and the house gets a quick spruce up. How embarrassing is it to have visitors when your house is a mess!!
~Having a plan - If my brain is functioning well on a particular day and I have the ability to think ahead, I know what needs to be done and what order I am going to do it in.
~Exercise- If I am having a “fat” day I use vigorous cleaning to make me feel better. Work up a sweat scrubbing floors and washing windows. On these days I know I don’t have to get on the treadmill, and I have a clean house to show for my exercise efforts.
My house is never 100% clean, but at least I have a theory why!! What do you think- could this qualify as a genuine excuse?
So if your house is out of control, it might be to time psycho-analyse yourself; identify what psychological complaint is holding you back and change your attitude accordingly. Voila-clean and controlled house!!, well maybe not (LOL).
I think a clean and clutter-free house is good for the mind and soul. I always feel better when my house is tidy and controlled. There is a regular guest on Oprah (sorry, I can’t remember his name off the top of my head) that specializes in de-cluttering the home to improve psychological state and he believes that this can improve everything from general mood to weight loss. I don’t know if his theories are research based, but I find it interesting to watch.
Happy cleaning!!!
(February 2009) (
