So true that we are raising adults. They will only be kids for maybe 14-18 years, they will be adults for hopefully 70 plus!

well said, my kids have to keep their room (shared) and the toy room clean. having such a big gap between ages, my son (6 yo) usually does most of the work generally whilst i give my daughter (2 yo) a more specific task as it is easier for her to concentrate on. they are both a bit scared of the washing machine when it is on but will help with the hanging up.

when i was young my brother and i did start off wanting to help mum but the jobs were usually done again "properly" by mum and it was really discouraging. it was not until we were older that mum figured out what she had done but by then we were lazy teenagers. parents need to be mindful that they must not redo chores that the child has compleated because to them it feels like what they have done is not good enough and they will just not want to try anymore. i let my kids help with chores but only the ones they are responsible enough to do well.

great article cheers from becca.

I think I must  be very strict. LOL My kids have to laod the dishwasher with us and unpack it. they have to help with the washing of clothes I have a very easy to use washing machine) they have to keep their rooms clean. have to clean up their bathroom after they use it ( mop is kept in there all they do is wipe the floor with it or a towel) all their washing has to be in the washing baskets. vaccy the floors. help cook dinner.

i dont think their is actually a chore in the house that the kids dont help with and they feel so much pride in helping.

we dont reward them with money either but gaming time on the pc and xbox ( specially our son) and we will treat them to take out too on the weekend.

excellent advice. xxxxxx

 Hey Ang another excellent article that I agree with.  My 2 year old has started to put his dishes in the sink.   He helps me unstack the dishwasher (put the pots and pans and plastic stuff away)  He also helps me stack the dishwasher (puts the spoons and forks in and some plates and cups etc)  very helpfull and he is proud when he has done it.  He says "big help"  when done.  

This article has prompted me in to thinking that he good do more like help with the washing and tiding up toys etc...

Thanks xxx

I couldn't agree more and this may sound sexist to some, however I think it is even more important for boys... In so many households with both partners working, the female partner still shoulders most of the household chores which is beyond ridiculous.  It causes so much ill will in relationships that it needs to be addressed to ensure our counterparts aren't lumbered with the same age old frustrating arguments that we have to put up with.  Jaydee has always loved doing the dishes, (water water everywhere) since he was about 1yrs old.  He puts his laundry in his basket in the mornings and evenings, clears his plates and cup and takes them to the sink, helps to hang out the washing, (this is a new thing, he is good at it too).  He has to tidy (we use the term loosely) his room on his days off 'school' it isn't like an extra chore or something he gets pocket money for, it is just part of life.

My children had chores like these,I was happy to do the actual cleaning but they were responsible to put things away and keep their room tidy. When they got to their teens and wanted their privacy, if they didn't clean their room I would tell them I was going to do it  and then they would clear everything ready for me to hoover, my boys were untidy but Helen was very fussy with her room

They do like doing little tasks to help when they are youg

Love Pauline

 Great advice chook xxx

This is great as children always need to learn about earning money, and also other social behaviours such as cleaning up after themselves, it does make them more independant, It is also important to reward them not just with chores but also with good grades as this helps them also with understanding that high achieving can also bring on great things. it really does help them understand the value of the dollar.

I would have to say this didn't work for me when I was a teenager. I was taught to be independant from a young age my father even taught me how the work force expects you to push a broom and I wasn't even old enough to work lol

As I got older, I never made my bed, my room was always a mess and it didn't matter what my parents said to me, it wasn't going to be clean. I was a straight A student, I wasn't disrespectful. I just expected people to mind their own business when it came to my personal space.

Of course I clean it now but it's still the messiest part of the house. If other parents didn't make their kids do chores I would keep my nose out of it, how they raise their kids is their business. However, I will be bringing my son up with chores.

Some parents can go over the top, such as my parents. They treated me like a house maid and as a result of it, I didn't want to clean anything for a very long time. I was degraded such as them writing signs that I can't use the bathroom because oh no it hadn't been cleaned in the last 24 hours! *sarcasm* must have missed doing it somehow inbetween working 40-50 hours a week and going to university full time ; - )

Some parents don't do anything and some parents expect way too much. As long as my teenager learns to pick up after themselves, lesson succeeded in my opinion.

This is great advice. Thanks. May be a little late for me but you give me great hope because you didn't turn out too bad, Ang! LOL My oldest son likes to keep his room nice and neat but my second is very lazy and unmotivated. What is my strategy? Shut his door! I agree totally with getting them to help with the basics so that it becomes habit. At least they get there dirty dishes to the sink and the dirty laundry to the basket, if they want to have clean clothes. Makes life easier even if you can't always get them motivated to do the bigger things like dishes or washing.

I think perhaps that mother may have a teen that doesn't want to do anything in the house?

I think it's important to teach kids to help out in the house. It teaches them skills for when they live on their own and have no moms and dads to clean up after them.   My little man is going to be 4 in a few weeks and we've already started him doing stuff around the house. He actually loves them because it makes him feel like a big boy. Just recently, I told him that it will be his job to clean up the table after we eat (wiping the table clean). He loves it! He goes around saying, "I'm a big helper! and I'm a big boy. I'm mommy's big helper!" 

 Yes I agree with you Angie and it can be extremely hard for us aswell especially if you don't have the support of your partner like myself when my kids were small. He was bought up that his mummy did everything for him and I was bought up that we all did our bit to help. When I would try to get my kids to do chores even if it was something simple as tidy your room my husband would say mum is in one of those moods again go play and it is very hard when you don't have their support. So I had to become the meany and they weren't allowed to play till their rooms were done and as teenagers that didn't change they weren't allowed to go to friends houses unless their rooms were tidy. Sometimes I would let their friends help them tidy their rooms so it at least got done. Getting them to help with the cooking also helps as they get older till they can make dinner on their own and have their own night that they cook. Which is great in theory as you would know but if dad doesn't do his night, like I did you are not setting a good example either. What do I say most our men are spoilt LOL

what great advice, I get Aaron to do all the above most times he will argue and not want to do it but in the end he always does. one thing I always remember when he makes his bed is its not as neat as I would do it but hay its done. as reward he gets to buy is lunch at school once a week.

Great article.

Note to self - must try harder! DD2 actually wants to help with tidying and cleaning - is she mine? DD1 is in danger of being like me - we were only made to help during school holidays, and if we did do anything, it was re-done to the correct standard by mum, which you can imagine meant I soon gave up trying! It didnt do me any favours.

So now I really ought to encourage DD2, and motivate DD1 before she thinks it's nothing to do with her!

DD1 generally gets thanks or stickers for helping (like to surprise her with the sticker when I've been impressed, eg I didnt have to ask), or a little bit of money for bigger jobs. Yesterday I found a toy in a second hand shop I knew she'd want, so I changed the earlier offer of 5p per basket of clean washing put away in drawers to 3 baskets put away straight after school, and she got the toy. It was worth more than 15p (£3), but the job needed doing and it got done in 10 minutes, and we got to play it with her today, LOL!

This is something I have be cracking down on lately.  The 4 year olds have to clean up after themselves, which most of the time they are happy to do- my major hurdle is that daddy doesn't clean up after himself, so its difficult to instill these values when a role model in the house doesn't practice what I preach.  But when mummy is there during the day- they pick up after themselves (dishes in the sink, clothes in the laundry, toys away before the next toy comes out, DVD's back in their cases, rubbish in the bin etc).  I don't just want help around the house, I want the kids to learn to respect their space, belongings and people around them.  Great advice.

 Excellent advice, couldn't agree with you more the earlier you start the easier it is.

Those 3 words INVALUABLE LIFE LESSONS say it all.

Cheers Janice

I am trying this at the moment, bought my kids money boxes for xmas so we could start the value for money for doing chores.... I have days when things go great and days when thing don't go so great... We are early days at the moment but I honestly believe thing will fall into place after some time...

Rusty

Well done and well written....

My two girls 2 and 4 have chores and they don't get paid for it as such but they do get a bead...When they have 10 beads they get 1 dollar, that has to be split into two, 50 cents for their saving money box and 50 cents for their spending money box.

I am just about to start removing beads for bad behaviour (especially with the 4 yr old).

I agree they have to learn responsibility,respect and discipline. nothing in this world is free when we are older and the earlier they learn to help themselves the better...As you say one day (soon :(  ) they will be adults and I wish them to have every opportunity they can to succeed and this I believe is part of the start to that.

Cheers Spinnychic