Re: downward spiral
anonymous

Question:
 

I've completely lost control of every aspect of my life. i've been spending money i cant afford to spend and lying to my partner about it. he works away for two weeks out of three so its easy

to do. i dont know why i'm doing it when i know its wrong. it's about to come back and bite me on the bum cos this last fortnight iv'e spent way too much for him not to notice. Another thing is my eating. after i had my baby i lost 7 kg and felt great about it but the last month or so i have been eating sooo much. bad stuff too chocolate and ice cream and pizza. Last night i downed a shocking 7 icecreams! i didnt even think about it i just did it and now i dont know how to stop eating. the worst of it all though is my babies. i have a 3 year old son and a 4 month old daughter and i am not coping. i am soooo exhausted that i just snap at the drop of a hat. i scream and yell at my son all day long. he is constantly doing naughty things and just follows me everywhere. he wont leave me alone for two minutes. Today i saw red and smacked him several times. straight away i was ashamed of myself and couldnt believe i did it. it really scared me to know that i could just snap and not even think about what im doing before i do it. i dont know where to get help. Obviously i need it. i dont want to tell my family cos i dont want them to know how out of control i really am. where can i get proffessional help?

My Advice:
 

I have been there a few times myself.  I don't know where you live but PLEASE do yourself and your family a favor and seek help.  I know there is help available and you WILL feel better and be able to cope with every aspect of your life better.  The antidepressants will help, but I think you also need someone to talk to.  If you can't do it for yourself right now, do it for your KIDS..... They need you, and you deserve to be happy.  It sure can't be easy with your partner working away so much, but there are places you can seek help, you should first start  with your primary doctor.  You can also check in your area for local support groups or social services.  There are alot of places to turn to for help and some of them also offer financial assistance or free services.  I have not been on Minti for long but I have read some great advice on here, so please add me as a friend, and continue to share so we can offer support.... Good Luck!