Single Parents & Resocialising

Single parents have two dilemas - one is how to manage on their own parenting, activities and outing for the kids, and two how to resocialise themselves.

RESOCIALISING FOR SINGLE PARENTS

One of the problems of divorce, separation and bereavement is the loss of social contact from the former partner and often from loss of social and extended family networks associated with the former partner. Developing a plan to resocialise is a key element in overcoming social isolation and the resultant risk of  depression.

There is a need to socialise and network with people in a similar situation - that is - single parents.

There is a lot on offer for mature aged singles and single parents - but how do you find out about it when you are new to this major life adjustment. There is a web site developed by a single parent for singles and single parents that aims to overcome this problem - it is http://www.SinglesDiary.net   The SinglesDiary.net is an Australian site that lists singles events whether they be run by single parent associations or commercial singles events organisers. It also has a resource section for single parents, singles articles, lists single parent and singles not-for-profit associations you can join, lists singles dinner groups (though some are too expensive for single parents). There is also online directory of childcare services. It is designed to be your best starting point and worth checking each week for what is on.

Besides the singles activities other strategies that should be in a personal resocialisation plan are:-

PERSONAL RESOCIALISATION PLAN.
1. Go to singles activities ( check www.SinglesDiary.net )
2. Join a single parents association like Parents Without Partners (check out

www.PWP-NSW.org.au

and www.PWP-HILLS.org - they have links to other PWP groups around Australia and overseas
3. Make a list of old friends - contact them and plan to catch up for coffee, etc.
4. Keep in contact with siblings and parents - family support can be invaluable during times of life changes.
5. Join a parent support group associated with the children's activities i.e. school parent association, children sports committee
6. Do a course for personal empowerment and enjoyment. Could be a craft course, something to help with work or a new direction. Make friends with fellow students.
7. Do voluntary work as part of a team - such as with the new single parents association you just joined - a great way to get to know more people.
8. Try online dating - be adventurous.
9. Plan to go out to socialise each and every week

SINGLE PARENT ASSOCIATIONS
Joining a group such as Parents Without Partners is a great way to meet new people in a similar situation to yourself as well you can start to make new friends and develop a personal social network. By becoming involved with voluntary work you get to know more people by working as part of a team, maybe even join their committee, host a function or organise one of the many childrens activities. Check out the informative web site for Parents Without Partners NSW at www.PWP-NSW.org.au

CHILDREN OF SINGLE PARENT FAMILIES
The children also go through a major life change - sometimes they don't express the loss or hurt - but it is important to focus on their needs which are likely to be different to your own.
Firstly, in divorce and separation, it is important not to involve the children in any taking of sides and keep them out of any arguments that there may be - they have two parents who love them and they love - the children need to be put in a neutral position. In bereavement there is a great sense of loss for children and they need more support - you need give them extra attention and consideration at this time.
Plan well ahead at least one special outing every two weeks - give them something to look forward to - some excitement in their lives - some enjoyment and so they can keep up with their peers in having stories to tell about their experiences. Groups like Parents Without Partners have affordable children's activities on every week and it is great to join in on their special functions and major excursions. One of the most active is the Hills PWP (the largest single parent group in Australia) see their web site www.PWP-Hills.org and see how much they have on for children, as well as their creative arts awards scheme and their children's educational scholarship program.

COUNSELLING, HEALTH, WELFARE & CHILDCARE SERVICES
On occassions some people feel they need some form of professional help whether it be counselling or some childcare assistance, etc. There is a very comprehensive online directory for those in Sydney on the Hills Parents Without Partners web site www.pwp-hills.org . If you live elsewhere then a good starting point can be your local community health centre - their social workers can help you contact a suitable local services.

Being a single parent can be a challenge - but once you adjust it can be a unique and rewarding lifestyle - but the key element to a quality of life is to plan to resocialise.