Re: Husband joining dodgy sites
anonymous

Question:

This is rather embarassing and i appoligise for the anonymous question.

My husband has been joining sites on the internet to find girls. Different sites that can be just dating to find sex in your area

ones. I found these deleting the history on the comp and have accessed his email account. while i know that was wrong, he has all these girls sending him emails. When we first got together he was ringing the phone sex lines and stopped when i found out.. although he still gets messages from things like that and tells me it is just the tele com sending him it,

Do i say anything or just let it go?

I am currently preg with our second child and while my sex drive is low i find myself unwilling to have sex because of this.

My Advice:
Lets try and be positive....You have reached out and asked Minti as a group for help in what you should do...

It would be so easy for us to sit back and say leave the cheating SOB or poor guy..give him 1 more chance and so on but....

Honestly, you are the only one that knows your husband and therefore the only one qualified to make the final decision...the last thing we Minti members should be doing is encouraging you wholeheartetly to finish your relationship.

Having said that I am sure that you will have formed a sort of preliminary decision.

Men are basically not that indifferent from most other males in the animal kingdom in that sexual intercourse is hardwired into their brains (however small they are) with but a few exceptions where some animals partner for life.

We do not know your family life or what his life was about before he met you so we do not know what events may have led him to want to explore affections from other women but it is my belief that you should confront him (if you feel safe) about what he is doing. Be stearn and dont let him wriggle out of the truth. It may be hard to listen to what he has to say but find out why he has urges that cause him to stray from home.

Tell him how you feel about the situation....You will then be able to use this information together to work out if there is a future for you both.

Whilst this has potential to cause much marital harm and heartache you are both adults and need to think as such as your children will not want to experience any uncivil tendancies you may have toward eachother now or in years to come.

My thoughts are with you as I am sure yours are going a million miles an hour.

Lifes troubles are like a magnet...One can not solve a negative situation with a like force.

Regards

Robert A