Practical tips for separation……what next? (Australia)

  So for whatever reason, you have decided to separate from your partner.  When there are kids involved, this can be a complex and stressful process.  When I separated from my husband, whom I had been with for 11 years

and had 3 children with, I found it all overwhelming.  There were many questions I had raised for myself about the future for myself and my children, and having no-one in my family or close friends who had been through this before, I wasn’t sure where to start.  I have since attended a WEA course run by a financial advisor and lawyer for more information and have included some general advice from that session, as well as my own experience.  I hope to be able to offer some practical advice for those mums going through the same thing.

CENTRELINK

You may be entitled to Centrelink payments.  No-one wants to be dependent on the government for income (well, most of us have a sense of pride in our ability to care for ourselves) but when there is a change in circumstances which affects your finances, especially when there are children involved, you should at least see what you can get to help. 

  Before you talk to Centrelink, make sure you have at least 6 weeks worth of you last payslips, your most recent utilities bills, phone bill, bank statements, home loan information and statement, and if possible, your partner’s income details for the last 6 weeks.  I spent a lot of time chasing up paperwork because I had let my filing lapse in the stress of it all and things got thrown out that should have been kept.

The payments you receive will depend on your income and the number of children you have.

  Family Tax benefit part A and B

As part of this payment I received a health care card.  Doctors appointments are now bulk billed and pharmacy medicines are cheaper. (for example, my daughters asthma medication used to cost me around $50, now it costs me $10.60).

  Parenting Payment Single- because I work, the parenting payment does not amount to much for me (about $50-$70 per fortnight for 3 kids).  But the benefit of this payment is that it comes with the pension card, so other expenses are cheaper.  You may get discounted council rates, electricity, gas, ambulance cover, cimema tickets, entertainment, public transport tickets, TAFE fees, telephone services (line rental).  The concession line can give you more information (1800 307 758).

  If you have a variable income, like myself, you will need to notify Centrelink every fortnight of your income for the previous fortnight so they can calculate your entitlements. (Earnings phone no. 13 32 76).

  Notifying Centrelink that you are single will decrease your childcare costs.  Our childcare expenses halved due to the higher percentage of child care benefit I was entitled to.

  I was required to complete a “separated under the one roof” form, because my ex was still living in the house while he found a place to live.  Take note that if you need to do this, you will need to supply 2 references to vouch for your situation and Centrelink will ring them and question these 2 people about your relationship with your ex and how it has changed since you separated.  I was not aware that my references would be called and did not warn them.  I had to apologise to these people, even though I had asked their permission to be my referees, as I did not know that they would be inconvenienced by this process.

  You may spend a lot of time on the phone to Centrelink, so try to make these call when the kids are safe and entertained.

  I recommend drawing up a book or record of ALL of your dealings with Centrelink in the beginning, noting who you spoke to, the date, and what you were told.  I had issues in the first few weeks where someone had told me one thing and someone else told me something different and I was asked constantly who I had spoken to and who gave me what info.  Just remember this is a government agency and it does not always run smoothly.

  If you sign up for internet access you can see what payments are owed and when, also what actions you might need to take, without having to make phone calls.

  You can get advice from a Centrelink Financial Information Service Officer to help you determine your entitlements.

CUSTODY AND PARENTING PLANS

The children come first!!!!

The courts will lean towards 50/50 custody/parenting responsibility, unless there have been issues with child abuse, family violence or circumstances that prevent parental responsibility from being fulfilled.

 The courts may take into consideration that young children need stability and it would be in their developmental interests to have a firm foundation with one parent, usually the mother.

  You may write out a parenting plan, signed and dated by both parents, to define who has custody, when visitation is, in what way you wish to share care, how the children are to be parented etc.  This protects the agreement for future court related issues but is not legally binding. If both parents are in agreement you can do this yourselves.  If there is disagreement, you may enter into mediation.  You can do this through Relationships Australia, Centacare, Uniting care Wesley.…….(phone numbers below).

  The children’s wishes are taken into consideration if the matter goes to court, and although there is no fixed age for when a child can decide where he or she spends his or her time, generally from early high school age is when child decisions take weight.

  If the matter goes to court, the child may be assessed by a psychologist to aid in the decision of who custody goes to.  Take note that if you are filling your child with negative thoughts, comments and general undermining of your ex, this is frowned upon by the family court, and part of your custody may be lost to the other parent due to the supposed negative impact of this influence on the child.  If your ex is doing this to you- be reassured that it will work in you favour when in comes to getting custody.

CHILD SUPPORT

You may choose to have private arrangements for child support payments.  However, Centrelink my require you to seek formal child support via the CSA (child support agency).  You can chose to have a private collection if the relationship is amicable enough (this method is encouraged).  It is recommended that money is placed into an account, rather than handed over in cash, so that there is a record of the money being paid.  If there are issues with obtaining payment, then the CSA can get the payments on you behalf.  They are able to backdate up to 3 months worth of payments, if you wait longer than this to follow up on missed payments then you will probably not receive those payments.

  See the CSA website to calculate what you might be entitled to for child support.

PROPERTY SETTLEMENT

Everything that is worth something is able to be divided during settlement.  It does not matter whos name is on it, who contributed the most to it, who bought it.  Everything that is considered a marital asset is able to be divided.  If you are a mum, out of the workforce and have contributed very little financially, your hard work is still recognised as contribution to the marriage and will be payed out accordingly.

  Furniture values are taken as 2nd hand values (how much would it sell for in a garage sale/trading post etc).  When splitting assets you may wish to divide those assets that of similar value- you can have the dining set, I will have the outdoor setting, you have the washing machine, I have the freezer etc.

  The house, bank accounts, shares, investments, income protection and life insurance policies, household goods, cars, and all other assets are included in the property settlement process.

  Post separation debts and savings are not taken into consideration during settlement, unless there is a question of “need”.  Ie- if you have put a large lump sum into your account and are not seen as being in desperate need of those settlement funds, then you may receive less.  If he racks up a huge credit card debt after separation, then that is his problem to sort out.

BANK ACCOUNTS

You will need to decide how joint bank accounts will be split.  This will depend on who has the greatest need for funds.  We decided to split our account almost 50/50.  I had the kids and the mortgage to need funds for, yet he had the setting up costs of a rental bond and furniture etc, to need to buy.  In the end it balanced out and we came to an agreement.  If things are nasty then you may need to seek immediate help in protecting some finances for yourself.  Unfortunately it does happen where one person takes all the money from a joint account leaving the other with nothing.  If you suspect that you may be separating soon it might be wise to open your own account and start to put a little bit away for safe keeping so that you are not left with nothing.  Bank accounts may need to be split at the time of property settlement if an agreement cannot be reached.  Even accounts in separate names will be considered as assets at the time of property settlement.

SUPERANNUATION

Super is a tax structure in which assets are held.  Super is not able to be accessed until the age of retirement but as part of property settlement, super funds may be transferred in between spousal accounts.

  It makes good financial sense to put money into super, especially if your income is above the 30% tax bracket.  Super is only taxed at a rate of 15%, and even though you cannot immediately access these fund, you end up with more in your pocket.  The government may put in dollar for dollar if you contribute a certain percentage of you income toward super, so it’s worthwhile taking advantage of this.

Superannunation can be salary sacrificed.  You don’t need to go through a larger packaging company such as Renumerator or McMillan Shakespeare (requiring a fee for management of the salary sacrifice) if you work for the state government.  In this case you could go through payroll of your employer and set up super deductions via salary sacrifice.  In the end you pay less tax, have more in your super fund and there is more money in your pocket.

You may want to check who the beneficiary of your super is.  If you die before your ex, do you really want him getting all your money- you may wish to remove him from the policy and insert the children as beneficiaries.

As part of the settlement process, it needs to be decided if the super between spouses is going to be divided or if assets will be divided in other ways.  For example- you may wish your ex to keep his super fund as it is, and you keep his share of the house instead.

If you do intend on splitting super, you will need the most recent statements (closest to the separation date) of all super funds in question.  If your ex is not willing to give these up easily, you may complete a “Superannuation Information Request”.  This is a form you fill out to get access to his super information for the purpose of splitting the super.  Normally this sort of thing is covered by the privacy act, but in this situation it is an exception to the privacy act.  You will need to go through a family lawyer for assistance.

THE FAMILY HOME

I chose to stay in the family home with my children so that they would have stability and as little upheaval in their lives as possible.  Take note that whoever is in the home needs to pay the mortgage, even if the ex’s name is still on the title.  However, you are entitled to also change the locks and have your privacy, despite his name still being on the title.

If you are not able to stay in the family home, you will need to decide whether to buy or rent.  If you decide to rent, you may be eligible for rental assistance.

INSURANCE

Check your policies for life insurance beneficiaries.

Check the insurance policies for who is covered.

Check your policies for what is covered.  You may be able to remove some items from your insurance if they are no longer applicable. I was able to decrease my insurance when I took my ex’s car off the policy.

MEDIATION

Relationship counseling may not just be for the purpose of keeping a relationship together.  In this instance relationship counseling may be used to assist both people to come to an agreement with parenting issues, financial issues and property settlement.  Family relationships centres may be helpful, Relationships Australia, Centacare, uniting care Wesley, all provide mediation services.

Ideally an agreement will be reached without the need to go to court.

Prior to going to court, Compulsory Family Dispute Resolution must be sought in children’s matters.  If you organise an appointment for dispute resolution and he does not show up, then you may request a certificate as evidence which states that you have put in the effort.  The only exception to this is where there is a matter of urgency such as domestic violence.

NEW BUDGET

Your income will be different, your expenses will be different as a single parent compared to a co-parenting household.  Therefore your regular budget will no longer apply.  I recommend recording every child support payment, Centrelink payment, income and all expenses to judge how you will be financially, then decide what savings you are able to put away, if you can afford income protection type insurances.  You may need to cut back on some non-essential items, plan for spending over a longer period of time.  On the other hand, the discounts of bills and health care combined with extra benefits may be enough not to have to alter your lifestyle too much.

WILLS

Wills are not cancelled by divorce.

You will need to review your will on separation- who is the trustee, who are the beneficiaries and who will have custody of the children.

DIVORCE

You may or may not choose to divorce.  If there is another partner on either side that wishes to become married then obviously the divorce process will have to go ahead before the new marriage can proceed.

A legal period of separation is not required in Australia, however there must be evidence of an irretrievable breakdown of marriage lasting 12 months prior to filing for divorce.  There is a filling fee involved, unless you have a pensioner concession card, then the fee is waived.

DIY (do it yourself kits) are available.

PHONE NUMBERS

Child support……………………….. 13 12 72 8:30-4:30 mon to fri

www.csa.gov.au

Family relationships Australia…….. ..1800 050 321- advice for when both parties can’t come to an agreement or cooperate. 8am-8pm M-F, 10-4 Sat.

Centacare……………………. …….. 8210 8200 (SA)

Uniting Care Wesley………...  ……..8202 5111 (SA)

Women’s Health Statewide….. …….8239 9600 (SA)

Family Court………………… …….1300 352 000 (SA)

Legal Services Commission….  ……1300 366 424

Police Attendance……………. …….131 444

Domestic Violence Crisis Service…..1300 782 200

Domestic violence Helpline….  ……1800 800 098

Cenrelink appointments……………. 13 10 21

Centrelink Family Payments………  13 61 50

TO DO CHECK LIST

c-decide on living arrangements

c-find out what ALL assets are worth and any debts you may have

c-ring Centrelink, see what you might be entitled to

c-make an appointment with family law solicitor for advice and new will.

c-write out parenting plan

c-check all insurance policies, take out new policies if necessary

c-change medicare details

c-organise mediation if necessary

c-seek financial assistance

c-seek protection if necessary

c-collect all necessary paperwork- find bills, payslips, passports, birth certificates

c-check your superannunation accounts for benficiaries, account balance at time of separation

c-obtain your ex’s superannuation details either by request or force

c-formalise child support, either by private agreement or through the Child Support Agency

c-organise counseling for yourself and your children if age appropriate

-start a new budget record

c-decide on custody, and visitation

c-notify teachers, carers, childcare staff of the separation so that they are aware and can be sensitive to the needs of the child. Ask them to notify you of any associated issues

c-notify your ex of removing him from insurance policies, medicare card, ambulance cover etc

c- close joint bank accounts and open new accounts in your own name only

c-keep a record of communication with the ex

Disclaimer: This advice is only a guideline to what to expect with the separation process and who to contact based on my own experience and the information that I have at this time.  Please consider your own situation and circumstances before following any advice.  Some things may not be applicable, some suggestions may be inappropriate for your individual situation.

DON”T FORGET TO LOOK AFTER YOURSELF!!!!!!!