ADVICE RATING |
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When You Can't Keep Them Safe |
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by nell18-3  (September 9th) (rank 1st) |
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I don't know?
You raise them from birth
Get through all their illnesses and other scares
Prepare them for school
Help with their homework
Wait nervously for exam results
Send them into the real world thinking
Job Done!!!!...............
If only it was that simple
Recently my daughter has twice been randomly mugged on the way home from clubs at night
I've hammered it into her until I am literally blue in the face, she looks at me, sighing with the ever present phrase
"I know all this Mum"
Yet still it seems, our older children think they are safe
Evidently they are NOT!!!
I guess as a Mother I have two choices:
1) Be anxious, keep fretting, call her at all times of the night and day to check she is ok, drive past her home and check her car is in the drive and lights are on at ridiculous times of the night, demand she texts/calls me everytime she has been home and returned safely...................
If you have a child, like my daughter, then you know that these are all completely unworkable options if you want to maintain an healthy relationship with them
2) Trust them.
I will always take the opportunity to remind my daughter and eventually my sons of some basic, sad but true facts:
*You should never think it is completely safe to walk home alone
*If you are in a group, have a "party buddy" that you are both answerable to each other for your whereabouts, make sure that particular person will not go home or onto another venue without making it clear they have gone
(On my daughters first attack, she went to a club with one group, met another group for a chat, they left, she returned to the original friends she had arrived with only to find they had gone too)
*If you leave the party/club with someone, make sure that others know you are gone and who you are with
*Absolutely NEVER leave your drink unattended, only allow people you KNOW to buy you a drink unless you go to the bar also and order the drink yourself
*Never park your car in a deserted/unlit area that you may have to get back to on your own later
*Keep a whistle/alarm in your hand as you are walking
*Wherever possible stay in a group
Unfortunately, there is no 100% reliable way to be truly safe from all attacks when out.
However, we can certainly make our older children aware of all risks, even if they don't seem to take us seriously at the time and think we "worry too much" the knowledge will hopefully stay fresh in their minds
