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Be careful asking questions that you already know the answer to.

MumKim by MumKim Young Parent(August 2006) (rank 13th)

Be careful asking questions that you already know the answer to. First ask yourself "why am I asking this question". If the answer is - to help my child to learn or to encourage my child to talk then read on. 

When I was in 2nd year

at uni we had to tape ourselves talking to a child. As I listened to my tape I thought ‘no wonder Connor has stopped talking. It sounds as if I am interrogating the poor boy’.

After that I learned that you got more conversation and conversation attempts from children if you made more comments and asked just a few questions.

Often in clinic I found parents making the same mistake I had made, especially with reluctant talkers. They probably did it more because of where they were (speech pathologists office).

I started using a little demonstration (I always asked the parents permission first)

I would ask the parent
"What is your name? "
"What colour is this?"
and then hold up several objects and ask "What is this?"
"What have you just learned from my questions?"

The answer to this question is nothing! (except perhaps what it feels like for the child to be on the receiving end) Both the parent and I knew the answers to all of the questions. I wasn’t teaching them anything, just testing.
 By making comments you have more chance of teaching the child new things. A good ratio of comments to questions is about 4:1

Not all questions are bad questions. Children need to learn to answer questions to do well at school. Some types of questions lead to more opportunities for learning than others. It is important to think about how you will support the child to answer the question if they don’t know the answer.

The following example uses forced choice to help the child answer the question

[b]If you know that Jamie knows what a banana is but you are not sure she knows what a pear is. If you ask “what is this? (pear)” and she looks at you blankly try asking “is this a banana or a pear?” She knows it is not a banana so she is more likely to say pear. [/b]

[b]If you think she might need extra support you may like to shake your head as you say banana and nod and smile as you say pear. That increases the likelihood she will get it right and gives you the opportunity to praise her knowledge and keep her engaged in the activity.[/b]

[b]Reading books with your child is a good opportunity to practice commenting and questioning. Some good questions to ask are[/b]

What's happening?
-what will happen next?
-How is she feeling? Why?
-Why did that happen?
-Why did the girl do that?
-How do you know?
-What would you do?

some examples of comments include

Look what’s happening. The boy has fallen off his bike.
The boy is sad because his bike is broken

By making comments like these you demonstrate to the child the language they need to answer the above questions.
Any contributed content above is the subjective opinion of that member or external author, and not of Minti.com Pty Ltd. If you are searching for health related advice we strongly suggest you seek professional medical support. View our Terms of Service for more details.
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mewannaboy
4.00 (Good) | August 2006 | mewannaboy
teaching a child
yes i agree , i too teach my children the way you demonstrate.when my daughter was reading and got a word wrong i do not let her go onto the next page and i let her see for herself where she got it wrong if she said freed instead of fried well i let her see that the word hasnt sounded right by making her re read the line again.or with my younger child.If i ask her what is this, then i also ask but how do you know then she can indicate its a banana because its yellow, its bent,the smell or wahtever else then she gives me other indications that she hasnt just guessed.is this right too??


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mcm
4.00 (Good) | August 2006 | mcm
Giving options
I like that - not "What is this?" but "Is this  a banana or a pear" It gives them options and is process of elimination.


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missjoy
5.00 (Excellent) | August 2006 | missjoy
educating our children through how we talk

Wow, thats awesome. I so agree with you there.I have been babsitting since i was 14 and i see a lot of parents talk baby talk to their kids, now to some degree its cute and all of that but how what does it teach the child as it goes from baby to toddle are they going to say bot bot or bottle when they are older? What we say to our kids and how we say it  is so important!!



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      JadieLady
4.00 (Good) | August 2006 | JadieLady
educating our children through how we talk
thats why brian and i feel sorry for liam. we both talk kind of stuck uppish and unfortunately he will probably pick up words like bizarre in his day to day language. poor thing will probably get pickedon when he gets older. but at least he will have a very large vocabulary.


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shoolacy
4.00 (Good) | August 2006 | shoolacy
New perspective
Its good to have new perspectives on things we do everyday if we read advice we like when bub is young it makes it much easier to change our habit before its totally ingrained I will try this technique with bub as I want him to feel like he can always talk to me


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JadieLady
August 2006 | JadieLady
fantastic
I couldnt agree more. i always find on the phone with my litle brothers and sisters that if i ask the questions they say less and less. if i talk about me and other things they are more likely to say excuse me, guess what i did yesterday!


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