Fussy Eater

Hi Re Fussy Eater

My kids are both adults now....my son turns 21 on Oct 4 and my daughter is 19 ... on March 7 she turns 20 (now thats something you needed me to point out ah?).  Anyway....my kids were both picky eaters and if that is all you have to worry about with them .... dont worry.  I will tell you the same thing I told my kids the entire time they were growing up....here it is:

EAT WHEN YOUR HUNGRY...STOP WHEN YOUR FULL OR SATISFIED AND THAT IS THE WIEGHT YOUR SUPPOSE TO BE.  WE ALL HAVE A DIFFERENT WAY OUR BODIES MATOBOLISES FOOD AND DRINKS AND WE ARE NOT ALL GOING TO BE THE SAME SIZE....!!

Never force a child or teen to eat when theyre not hungry..all your doing is making  it so they have a food issue when they are grown.   A baby, a 2 - 4 year old, a preteen,  and a teen  all know how much food they want, how much liquids they want and when they are as full as they want to be at the time.  I always when packing my hubbys lunch (yes I did this cause I love him very much and I want to be sure hes eating well) and my kids lunch told them you can always bring the extra home but you cant come get it.  Id rather them not eat a banana or pudding then eat everything and still want more so its off to candy machine, corner store or pop machine for more food.  Unless your child is oviously losing weight and at that even as long as they look healthy and nothing out of the ordinary appears...its fne. We all eat differently and different amounts...I would just make sure they are getting in lots of water and milk.  I would limit the juice or avoid it and go with fresh fruit as the cool aids and the packaged, bottled and frozen juice containers are usually quite high in sugar and not much else. 

When my kids were growing up over 20 years ago...it may sound mean but they were not allowed in the fridge ...could not make theyre own food no matter what it was.  I NEVER had candy, chips, ice cream or other frozen stuff in the freezer, no pop, juices (very limited treats), and those chocolate, peanut butter etc. bars that come in the packs of 6 or 8 were for lunch at school only!   If they were thirsty they would ask for a glass of water...or when they were tall enough to reach the cuboards...they would take a PLASTIC (never glass ... it may be dropped and broke) cup or plastic glass and fill it up under the tap (water coolers were not around much back then).  With breakfast, lunch and supper both kids and hubby got a glass of milk (choc or white) and of course as much as they wanted.  The reason for no fridge access was safety basically....!  I was not about to take the chance of them grabbing a glass bottle of pickles or jam or a block of cheese and dropping the glass and cutting them selves or getting a knife out  to slice the cheese or whatever up.  

Both my kids grew up great!!!   Both live on theyre own....my daughter with her soon to be hubby for over a year now...and my son also on his own and has his own buisness.  Both to this day do not drink more then a dozen pop a year...or juice and go for either water or milk.  Both never worry about food...over eat because its never been made a big deal to them they always knew they were in total control as to how much they wanted...and tell me that to this day.  Both are very normal weights....my daughter is 5 foot 8 inches and wieghts 135 pounds give or take 5 pounds up or down but never any more!  My son 6 foot ... and wieghts 190 again up or down 5 pounds but never anymore.  Literally all my friends that had babies at the same time as my hubby and myself and family members with kids...all the kids have had weight problems and/or eating disorders..! 

One last thing and  I will shusssh myself....!  TV... there is violence, smut and swearwords just about everywhere.  Go on an ETS bus or transit or in a restaurant with teens and you will hear swears, pot stories, (cigs and alcohol)  some type of violence and very proud of it,  If they know and are totally told NOOOOO WAY to shows they want to watch...well now you just put a gold ring around it and they want to be like the other friends at school that watched it .    They will go behind your back .....sneak up when your out to watch or go to a friends place on the story of doing homework and watch even worst with no adult supervision.  If its not a big NO NO and theyre choice....what fun is that....they would rather do something else about 90 %or more of the time. 

Be there for them...tell them they can tell you ANYTHING....no matter what (and as long as they re not hiding bodies under the house or physically or sexually hurting anyone else which lets face it you could stop it if they told you first).  Never look shocked ... surprised ...upset ...mad ..when they come to you or they will clam up and go else where.  Never give them a choice of the parent they love most as in fighting....keep them totally out of it and if it gets loud go talk to them right after with perferably both parents and explain very briefly (if appropriate) what upset you or both of you so much.  And I used to always say....you get mad sometimes at your friends....well dad and I are best friends too and sometime we get upset at each other.  If you dont get whats bothering you out in the open with each other all that happens is its baried and the next time your upset with this person you remember the last thing and you increase the situations madness more.  Best to be honest and deal with it as we are all human...make mistakes and get angry! 

Okay...I will stop talking or writing I guess ah....!  And one other thing, my daughter when she was about 8 years old she go lice.  Let me tell you....these yukky things are big enough to see running through the hair.....not the crap that is told about them being so small you can barely see them.  My daughter had these discusting things about 14 times and we were broke from buying the lice killing stuff from the pharmacy and very angry and terrified of getting them.   My daughters hair even then was and still is almost to her waist and thick.  After several infestations....I ended up cutting her hair up to her chin .... her screaming in tears.  My husband brought home deseal fuel from work and put that on in very small doeses at first to be sure no  burning or stinging etc. would occur.  IT DIDNT....thankfully but after about a week they were back.  Even the old remeady of the lamp fuel didnt work.  Well my father was living with a women with native descent and she mentioned this to her native mom.  She told my father to tell us to slather her hole head and hair in regular vasoline...and put a plastic shower cap on overnight. With no more to lose we did and the next morning .. we put her head under warm - hot water and these things...all of them full grown and nits on the hair shaft slid right out till the sink was full of them.  We had to use dish soap to get all the grease out about 4 -6 times but it was worth it.  She never got them again!!!!

Okay ....night other parents!