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Basic information on taking kids to restaurants has been well-covered here and elsewhere, but there are some down and dirty details I can share that might eliminate some of the pain. Of course, all children are different, and they change so much from infancy to preschool. Because of this, the 
first rule to remember is that eating in a restaurant with young children is a lot like going into battle. You must tirelessly prepare beforehand, knowing that as much as you prepare things can and will go horribly, horribly wrong. Remain flexible, be ready to think on your feet, and remember that there is no shame in retreat. Or at least much, much less shame.
1. If you have children that are old enough to want to know where you're going and what you're going to eat, for god's sake, don't tell them exactly where you're going or exactly what you're going to eat. You are setting yourself up for a tantrum when the restaurant is closed for some odd reason. Or when they are inexplicably not serving their favorite food that night. One night, I promised my toddler beans and rice. Restaurant #1 was closed for some unknown reason. Then Restaurant #2, where we hadn't been for quite some time, which was 1/2 hour away from the first one, was being remodeled. Our dilemma was clear: tell toddler we are not getting beans and rice and endure a huge mood-polluting tantrum that would most certainly bleed over into our restaurant experience or drive for another 1/2 hour to restaurant #3? We chose the latter. Which brings me to...
2. Always bring some back-up food. Whether you are stuck in the car looking for the restaurant, waiting in line for a table, or waiting for your food, you're going to want to have snack items that you can judiciously dole out. Gold fish. Graham crackers sticks. Cheerios. Whatever keeps their mouths occupied with another task besides screaming their bloody heads off. And if you're really unlucky, and they hate what's on the menu, you can try and cover your rear with the snacks you've brought and...
3. During emergencies, it is perfectly acceptable to order dessert for the hooligans right away. This buys you time to pay the bill and stuff your food into doggie bags before your children do something that lands you on the local news. For example. When my in-laws were last in town, we wanted to take them out to dinner. It is almost impossible to make people not in the day-to-day world of young children understand that location and the right timing is of essence if you want to have a good dining experience. So we pull up to the restaurant (not child friendly) at 6pm (one hour before bedtime). It goes just as you might expect. Food takes forever to get there. Restaurant decibal level was negligible until we walked in and getting louder for every minute time passed without food on the table. Toddler did not like what was one the menu. Glaciers melt faster than these people eat. So I ordered a big bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and sprinkles. It was kind of like throwing myself on a grenade to save a village. And it worked.
4. Crayons and restaurant menus are boring. Don't count on the restaurant to entertain your kids for you. You can take a plastic pencil box for each child and stuff it with special goodies to keep them occupied while you are waiting. Get creative with what you fill it with AND (this is very important) don't let them play with this sort of thing all the time. Keep it special for restaurants. My 3 year old is still entranced with forbidden stickers, stamp pads, and a special set of markers. I've heard of parents bringing small cans of play-doh. Temporary tattoos could be charming. Magnetic play books. Punch out cards with shoelaces to string. My 9 month old is much harder to please, but a bunch of finger food and a bowl to fill and empty over and over have been working pretty well. We also sit the two close to each other because they do a better job of entertaining each other than we can do.
5. This only works with the toddler, but we have a short and strict set of rules about restaurants. We go over the rules before we go in, and we don't let stuff slide. The rules are: stay in your seat, use your indoor voice, and don't play with your food. Too many infractions will involve a boring trip to the car.
6. Toiletries. Always bring wipes that are easily accessible. If your kid mostly drinks out of sippy cups, bring an empty sippy cup with you. For the baby, I pack the essentials in a ziplock bag (bib, spoon, baby food), where the dirty mess can be packed back in and brought home. ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS bring a changing pad. You would be surprised how often you will have to change your kid on the floor because the restaurant has no changing table.
(October 2006) (
My husband and I used to get so stressed pre-restaurant outing, and we wondered why we did it each time (especially after the first drink-spill). But we kept at it and kept at it, and you know what? The kids' endurance extended beyond the first 30 minutes, and now they are actually quite well-behaved for the first 85 minutes. And another thing, I don't know whether other people have the same problem as me, but my kids always choose to do a "number 2" in a restaurant. I can't figure out whether it's their reaction to the general hygiene of the food or whether it is a timing thing. But take some anti-bacterial wipes with you so when you're faced with the janitorial task of wiping down the toilet seat, you won't feel quite as grossed out. And wet-wipes for the bum are a good idea too.
