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 4.67 (Highly recommend) from 20 votes (1089 Visits) |
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9 Spectacular Ways You Can Bond as Family |
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by jenlemen  (October 2006) (rank 20th) |
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- Put your family on the schedule. Before you sign your children up for every weekend activity imaginable, pencil in some family time instead. Lately, we've been saving our Saturday mornings for a big family breakfast. Whether you go out to a local dive or stay in for
 homemade pancakes and bacon, having a major meal together is an occasion for good conversation and fun. By setting aside a specific time to be together, we're sending our kids the message that our life together as a family matters.
- Get some together-itis. One of my best friends Judy cannot leave the house without husband and three kids in tow. I asked her if it was really necessary to take everyone with her everywhere she went. Her answer surprised me, "I could leave them, but we really like it when we are all together." From that day on, I could see how the simple act of driving around listening to music and doing errands was bonding their family. By including everyone for even the simplest outings, they constantly reinforced the message that things just aren't the same unless each person is present.
- Lounge around. One close friend finally realized that a key feature of her family's happiness was the ability to lay around and do nothing together. This family of professional couch potatoes couldn't be happier when they make a simple dinner, eat on paper plates and spend an evening puttering around the house. Once they recognized that hanging out was their favorite family activity they made a point to plan Chill Out Weekends on purpose. Now this loving brood looks forward to their "Just Us" times when they can enjoy each other's company without any plans or unwelcome interruptions.
- Go on a mercy mission. My parents were continually finding ways to help people in need in our community. As sisters, we spent our childhood in the backseat of the car on the way to deliver meals, visit people in nursing homes, attend wakes and the like. Our family bonded over learning how to be present when our neighbors and loved ones were going through hard times. Learning how to do that as a small child gave me a deep sense of what our family bond was all about. To this day, I feel a special connection to my sisters and my family whenever I find myself in similar situations.
- Travel together. The best family bonds are sometimes formed on those trips where you had to cut every corner and use a little creativity to make things exciting and fun. Dare to let your kids in on the budget and see what happens when everyone gets a chance to plan together. Last fall we had the unexpected chance to tagalong on my husband's overnight business trip to New York. We took turns picking the cheapest eats and best free activities. Our kids caught our passion for the city, and we've bonded over being the kind of family who just can't wait to get back to the Big Apple.
- Have a family sleepover. Get into your pajamas and invite the whole family to camp out in your room. If your family extends beyond the space allowed in your double bed, set up blankets and pillows on the floor. Spend some time reading books together by candlelight, and get comfy in a gigantic community snuggle. My kids love to hear stories about my own childhood while I hold them in bed at night, and now that they are getting older, I like to ask them to tell me their own stories about our life together so far. Physical affection and gentle conversation just might be the ultimate glue that helps families go the distance.
- Get a pet. Nothing pulls a family together like the shared love for an animal. Pets play an integral role in family memories for the littlest members to the oldest. Decide together what kind a pet you would like to have or let the door swing open wide when some stray critter decides to pick you. Resist the urge to take over all pet-care duties and insist the peanut gallery pick up the slack. By making your pet a family project, your furry friend becomes a unifying force in your life together.
- Extend the circle. One way to bond as a family is to include others in your inner circle. As newlyweds without kids, we enjoyed the warm support of an older couple with grown children. By being included in their family life, we became closer talking about our own future. Now as a family of four, we're the ones adding chairs to our dining room table so others can join in. Our sense of family takes on new proportions when we share our holidays and resources. Our children are delighted to be part of a family that extends to neighbors and friends as our communal bond grows.
- Ask the sages. Chances are even the littlest kids could tell you the very thing that makes your family great. Sometimes families have traditions and rituals that have never been declared or discussed, but your kids understand that these are things that make your family unlike any other. Ask your kids to help you see the regular rhythms of your family life and make sure these items stay on the front burner. The simple act of being willing to discuss what's working in your family will improve communication and reinforce the bonds that you are already forming on your intuition alone.
What's helping your family bond these days? I'd love to hear your stories in the comments below.
copyright 2006
jenlemen
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| ADVICE RATING |
4.67 (Highly recommend) from 20 votes |
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 Related keywords: bond, connecting, connection, family, ideas, kids, snuggle, suggestions
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I'd love to go to Nashville but I could never imagine my husband even wanting to go there. I think I might wait for my dad and sister to come back and we might take a trip together.... 
