Remembering a loved one's birthday

My sister would have been 41 this year.  It has been 2 years since she passed away.  Last year we never celebrated her birthday.  My daughters asked me why we didn't celebrate her birthday anymore.  I, of course, had no answer.

This past Sunday was different.  We chose to remember my sister by engaging in her favorite activities that we remember that she loved the best.  We didn't do the dairy queen trip.  However, we did a few different things.

1) Birthday Cake-  My daughters and I discussed making a birthday cake.  In the end we decided that she loved sugar so much that we made homemade breakfast rolls.  We lit a candle and sang.

2) We picked her favorite acitivites-  We chose to watch a major chick flick, paint our nails, and do our hair.  We chose a light comedy.  We laughed, laughed, and laughed some more.  My sister loved to watch movies!  We fluffled our hair and made our nails look fantastic!

3) We made special booklets-  We chose to write into our booklets the most favorite thing we enjoyed doing with my sister.  We will be able to keep these and reflect later.

4)  We ended the day by looking at her photo album that we made about my sister.

5)  We were doing to go to the gravesite.  However, it just upsets my youngest one too much.

6)  We discussed the items in our "while you are away" box.  We compared them with her photo album. 

My oldest sister called me in the afternoon.  I asked how she was doing on our sister's birthday.  She said she felt odd and off.   Amazingly I felt pretty good all day long.  I felt that we were remembering all the happy memories of my sister.  I didn't feel sad and lonely.  As my sister's birthday was getting closer, I was getting amazingly somber.  All the fun activities really seemed to help me remember all the fun times I had with my sister.  My daughters seem to enjoy remembering all the fun times.

  None of us cried all day long!!  That was a true milestone for all of us!