I have noticed lately that there have been quite a few questions pertaining to the changing of baby sleep habits, & as I keep basically repeating my same advice I thought I would write it up as an advice in the hope that sleep deprived parents out there might get a
chance to make a positive change sooner rather than later. First of all a baby around the 6 month mark is likely to be beginning the teething faze and this is where a lot of "not so ridged" sleep routines become unglued. Because bub is going through a personal growth and learning faze that effects his sleep patterns anyway and if they were not set in concrete before they will be set in water now. Time to add the quick dry cement. I wouldn't recommend being alone and doing it especially if you have been struggling through on little sleep already or you have PND. It is a stressful heart wrenching exercise and it will no doubt bring out one of your worse down moments due to the increased levels of anxiety it will cause. If hubby can't be there for you (due to work or whatever) maybe you can ask mum, sister or a great girlfriend to come and stay with you and help you out. That's what I would do. You will want to do this in shifts so that each of you can get atleast 4 hours sleep in a row. The only real solution is to control cry
with soothing in between for reassurance, but try not to go to him straight away, and try not to make eye contact with him when you are stroking or patting him. DO NOT take bub out of the cot. It might take up to 7 days worse case and 3 nights is about the best case scenario. It will be very hard but keep telling yourself, it is one week out of bub's life time and things will be better after that. Do NOT use musical toys to try to sooth him, instead try putting a fan in his room faced AWAY from him, the HUM of the fan will be incredibly soothing, not unlike the noises in your womb. Couple with this a loud ticking clock. What bub requires is constant and rhythmic sounds to sooth, settle and maintain a quality sleep. Remember each time you heard bub's heart beating before he was born?? It was rhythmic and loud with squelchy noises etc. Bub listened to this for months and months prior to birth, so it is a fallacy that you need to "shush, the babies asleep". The reality the steadier, louder and more rhythmic the noise the better sleeper you will have. I have a fan, a clock and frequently vac when my bub's asleep and always have, she sleeps right through it all like a ....."BABY".
6 month olds begin to TEETH How much sleep is bub getting during the day time?? Again we go back to the 6 month traditional teething age. Though that is not all that's going on with bub at this point in time. At 6 months bub is growing in general and learning EVERYTHING you see and hear on top of a great deal of tooth movement going on (bottom middle teeth are first, then top and then eye teeth. They can come up one at a time and takes 1-2 weeks for them to stop being an issue, or they can come up 2 at a time, but the time frame is about the same) He may be over tired and too irritable to sleep through. If you think this might be the case I suggest you try some Bongella or some other kind of oral gum relief gel (available in supermarkets baby section). Offer teething rings or foam characters (you know the ones that stick to baths when wet.....great for chewing on) The most reliable way to tell if they are teething is the amount of drool that has increased and the shoving of anything especially fingers in the mouth. Other tell tale signs such as rosy cheeks, nappy rash irritability may as in our case only occur AFTER the tooth/teeth have broken through, though I understand that my bub is a lil' unusual in this reversal of symptom presentation. Baby Panadol or Nurophen or any number of Baby Pain Relief available is there if you require it, but be warned that in some children it can make them drowsy whilst in others it makes them hyper...we are hyper-woo-hoo(not). Because of this I recommend trying it in the day for the first time so you may carefully monitor their response and you may well save yourself an incredibly late night. Dosing them up too often (all day etc) is not recommended because as with adults, over use of any medication can result in undesirable side effects such as liver damage. (if over used, is okay if used only when necessary, i.e.. at night when they are in obvious pain and the gel has not helped as might have hoped.)
Day Sleeps
During the day only give bub 2, 1hour sleeps, one morning and one at night. I used a kitchen timer for a week until my daughter automatically woke herself after 45 mins. which was what I chose (on recommendation ) to giver twice a day.
I have since changed this to 2 one hour sleeps (one in the AM and one in the PM), as this suits our lifestyle better. Should bub wake up prior to the timer going off, leave picking bub up until the timer has buzzed. Bub will be FINE.
I am sure you have a super safe sleeping environment that is both safe, secure as well as soothing and entertaining. Let bub learn how to sooth himself in this environment.
You need to have a cuppa and walk outside until the timer tells you to pick bub up and have a lovely cuddle and after 5 mins of waking up, offer some solids (if the time is right for that).
Sleep routines often piggy-back on other parts of the lifestyle routines, such as feeding and playing. My daughter is awake for 3 hours in the morning and then 3 hours in the afternoon and then 5-6 hours in the evening. This was done on purpose because it fits in with our families lifestyle at present.
For example my hubby does shift work so our daughter is timed to always be awake and in a well rested good mood before dad goes on night shift at 5pm, then I give her dinner and we have some mother daughter bonding time as I am also winding down.
I also like to sleep in as I suffer frequently from insomnia, so the thought of getting up at 5am when I have gone to sleep at 3 or 4 am is impossible. For this reason my daughter goes to bed at 9.30pm and sleeps straight through until 8-9am depending on teeth . This works for us.
Along with the noises in their room i.e. fans etc. you could try at this age using baby sleep bags..light weight if it's hot weather and polar fleece ones (or thick ones) if it's cold. You bub will get used to the fact that when they are placed in a sleep bag it's bed time, and the security of knowing what is going to happen next is a reasuring thing. Even though I guarentee you at first you wont think so by their reaction haha.
Be loving be tender but be firm. You also need not worry if you have them in a sleep bag that their wriggling about during their tantrum will not leave them cold and or exposed. reasuring for you too.
We also have a night light in our daughters room, she was scared of the dark for some reason from birth. I KNOW she wakes in the night but she doesn't make a sound, she has a 2 minute play with her toys and falls back to sleep. She sleeps and has done since 3 months, her Golly wog and her Noukie rattle bear, and I think she finds these to be extremely comforting. She grumbles to them of her unfair lot in life at being put to be when she is so obviosly not tiredzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz, I often find Golly or Noukie laying on her chest one chubby hand clasping there soft stuffed ones. they are her friends, and I am sure they have made her bed times easier for all of us.
Our daughter rarely takes more than 15 mins. to settle herself to sleep and has done for a few months now. Sometimes she still sobs heart wrenchingly though I don't feel the anxiousness or heart ache any more, I think "Just sleep already" or words to that effect, I know it is just what she does. Whe I tell her it's "Nie, Nie's Time" First she'll throw herself at me in an endearing hug, then when that doesn't work I will have kisses blown at me, when that also doesn't work she drops her bottom lip gets the chin quivers but generally holds of actually crying until I am tucking her in, and then the unfairness of it all is well and truely heard for about 10-15mins. Quite cute and funny these days, and you will get there too. Just one week of hard work, not even a full week and it will get easier every night, but you MUST stick to your guns or it will be a case of 1 step forwards and 2 steps back as they realise they have the upper hand. I suggest you sit down and work out what kind of life you want i.e.. perhaps unlike myself you are a morning person and would like to start your day at say.
EXAMPLE DAY PLAN 6.30am. So you get up at 6.30am have your morning cuppa, a shower, read the paper for 10 mins and you feel quite human by 7am when it's time for Bub to wake up.
7am After some cheery good mornings and a nappy change and a bib on, it's time for some cereal so you eat together. babies learn to chew and swallow and use their tongues more from watching and mimicking than any other way, so by you eating something similar at the same time is going to be extremely helpful to your child and you get to have a sit down breaky as well (use a plastic drop sheet, I use cheap party table cloths from Discount stores for AUD$2-4.00) Make mmmmmmmmm, noises as you chew as this will slightly distract bub and they'll swallow automatically.
7.30 After breaky and a clean up of EVERYTHING (have a wash cloth and a dish cloth standing by if you are in a dining area rather than a kitchen area.) it's time to get bub dressed and then you have a play, then leave them to roll around on the floor entertaining themselves for a bit and you can go to the loo or what ever (as long as you can hear them).
8.30 Then a Jolly Jump if you have one or a walker or exasaucer (I think that's like a walker) for some good exercise. I find this is a great opportunity to vac and wash floors or at least pick up stuff and vac. as there is no bub underfoot, they are mesmerized by the vac, so you are guaranteed of getting the whole lot done.
9.15 Then give morning feed/bottle and (by 9:45) a morning nap might ensue after that. Then you can jump on Minti for an hour and a half because you've set your kitchen timer. Okay maybe first you should put on some washing,THEN hop on Minti.
11.15 When the 1.5 hours are up, have a nappy change, have a play after, they've been up for a half hour to 45 mins. (you want them to BE hungry) have some lunch (don't forget the drop sheet), again you eat with them, this might take 20-30 minutes. after that pop bub in playpen or porta cot outside or leave to play in a safe environment by self whilst you hang out washing, or wash some dishes start dinner etc. have another play together, have some tummy time with you encouraging them to move towards you etc. Leaving them to entertain themselves is best done as soon after a nap as is possible as the tierder they get the more clingy they are, so get done what you want to get done and leave bub to entertain himself for a while. They need to learn how to do this, they need to learn that you can be relied upon to return when you leave the room etc. It is highly recommended. As long as the environment is completely safe, and if you can hear them (baby monitors if you go outside are handy). You know your bubs cry's by now, I know when my daughter is tired and wanting to be cuddled versus I have fallen flat on my face and I'm stuck for example (she's not crawling yet, but has been sitting for ages.)
2.15pm After noon snack.
If you find it impossible to keep them awake in the afternoon for more than 4 hours let them have a 15 minute cat nap. You will be surprised at how rejuvinated they will become (after an initial 10 minutes of how dare you wake me up grumps) you will get another 2 hours out of them easily and a better sleep if you can push them to 3. Then you have you have your final bed time at around 7.30pm. And they should sleep through. If they don't follow the directions and suggestions written above.
3pm Bottle/feed & Cat nap (take in they may take 15 mins. to feed)
3.30pm Wake up from Nap. 10 mins of cuddles, soothing and distracting until they "come good", then they can watch you prepare dinner and have some finger food to keep them busy
6pm Should be pretty hungry, time for some dinner.
6.30 bath or get into P.J.'s (no need to bath every night unless you think it is important to them settling), some wind down time, sit on lap and play like, singing songs "Happy a& u KNow it clap UR hands" for example & where's your knees? where's your toes etc. read some board books and encourage them to turn pages. This is a comforting and wonderfully bonding time with interaction on your knee for at least half an hour, concentrated quality time)
7.15pm Feed/Bottle and bed Again this is just an example. Think about how you'd like your days to run and FIT baby in with your family's lives as much as possible. They will change your life, they will dictate your actions for a lot of the time, but you can take back some control and manipulate their sleep patterns to suit you, and then you can adapt the other things such as feeding. If you want to go out you can either stop and feed them at the right time OR as I don't go out that often (maybe twice a week on average at the moment) I just give my daughter a bottle which I propperd on a micro beaded cushion I took with us but as of 2 days ago she's now holding her own bottles, it just means you can finish your grocery shopping, or your drive or what ever it is you are in the middle of and they are exteremly likely to fall asleep with little problem at their pre-trained time even if they are not in their own beds. As long as you are SURE bub is fed and full, is clean and dry, is tired, hasn't got wind or any other pain (like teeth), then putting them to bed at the time you deem necessary and letting them cry it out for 20-30 minutes BEFORE you go and check on them and do the no pick up sooth thing IF they are still awake. If it does sound as though they are winding down go back and have another walk around the back yard or ring a friend, or read 2 pages of your book or magazine or have a smoke or a cuppa or what ever you want to do, but DON'T sit there in tears and anguish at their cry's. They ARE SAFE, they just are not getting what they want right now that's all. They will NOT hold it against you in the slightest, not one tiny piece of resentment will be sent your way. bub's don't work that way. You may feel guilt but it's not because they are putting it on you, it's because YOU are putting it on you. So remove yourself from the sounds and let them go for it. If it's bad weather outside, stick head phones on or turn up the T.V. what ever, just IGNORE it, and again if you want to use the timer to tell you when it's okay to give a pat and a shush and help reassure and settle, then do it again. They cannot stay awake forever and they won't, they will get used to it, they will quicker than you think, it just seems like forever because your heart is breaking. You are not alone. MOST of us have to do this at some stage.
It is Only a week, it is only a week it is only a week. It is Only a week, it is only a week it is only a week.
It will get easier, It will get easier,It will get easier, It will get easier,It will get easier,It will get easier 
(November 2006) (
