Tantrums

Don't you just love it when your little darling throws a tantrum? Mmmm, perhaps not. lol. Well, I'll share what has worked for me to stop them!

The best trick I have ever used has worked on my kids as well on others and that is - believe it or not - throw the tantrum with the child! Yes, that's right, get down on the floor, pretend to cry, throw your fists around, whatever. When I did this with my kids they would stop, sit up and look at me funny, and forget about what they were doing as they were more focused on what silly thing mummy was doing. One day after I picked my kids up after school, 2 friends both had 3 year olds who were upset, carrying on with a bit of a tantrum - I walked up and started to "cry", slouched down, saying things like, "oh, it's such a bad day.... "oh, boo hoo hoo, what will I do?" - the kids stopped and looked at me and started laughing! Their mums shook their heads at me, yer, I know, I'm nuts, lol, but it worked - the kids were happy again! Another instance was at a Childcare Centre where I was working for a while - a boy of about 2/3 years didn't want to put his toys away for lunch; he laid on the floor with his head down on his arms chucking a big wobbly; I laid down next to him, put my head down on my arms, and 'cried'; he  looked up so I  looked at him then he put his head down and continues so I did too; after doing this a couple of times he sat up and started to laugh. Again, success!

When it comes to tantrums patience and persistence is the key and NEVER, EVER, give into the child's demands. I know it's hard when you are in the middle of a supermarket and the child wants something, but throws a tantrum when told 'no'. Do NOT give in, no matter what! Once you give in, the child knows he/she can do the same thing again to get their own way. Perservere, ignore the stares of those who have no idea what kids are like, and ignore the child. A woman I know has a child who is almost 7 years old and she stills throws tantrums because the mother gives into her. My kids learnt very quickly that the more they carried on, the less likely they were to get what they wanted.

When at home, explain to the child that only good behaviour gets rewarded. If they behave at the shops, they may have a treat. Once at the shops, if the child starts carrying on, remind the child of this. If the child still does it, then do not give in, and once home explain why they did not get a treat. The other thing I used to do was to remind the child at the shops that tantrums will be punished once home - that could be by not allowing the child to watch a video, sitting the child on a chair for 5 minutes, not having ice cream after tea, etc.

My kids are now 12, 8, and 7, but for a long time now I have been able to take them to the shops without any sort of tantrum throwing. They ask for things, all kids do, but if I say no, that's the end of it - they do not argue about it.