hi is there anyone out there who can share some advice on blended family issues/situtations??

I grew up in a blended family and I bearly noticed the difference to any other sort of family but that was because I have never had contact with my biological father so

Unfortunately my daughters are not so lucky. They have a great step dad who treats them just like his own and they love him we have no problems there. The problems start with the girls having contact with their biological father.

Some families are really lucky and the non-custodial parent is a adult and thinks of the children before they think of themselves and if this is you and all you have is a couple of disagreements over minor things I would say these things are not important. Blended families can work very well if all parents invloved are willing to make things work.

When you have a non-custodial parent who only thinks of themselves and not the happiness of the children then you have more problems. My ex is one of these and my daughters suffer so much for it. Unfortunately there is nothing I can do about his behaviour. I have tried talking to him and so has his sister. I have tried to get him to go to counselling with the girls but he refuses. My husband has done everything he can to make my ex feel more comfortable and to try and be friends with him for the girls sake but the ex just is not interested.

We also tried getting him involved with the girls school things and regular contact but he never came to anything and has broken so many promises that I feel like I could scream every time he is within hearing. That would do the girls no good though. They do understand that I am not happy with him because it is really hard for parents to watch their children hurt repeatedly by someone who is meant to be taking care of them. But they also know that unless they say so I will not stop them from seeing him on the odd occasion he actually turns up.

Children understand alot more than people realise and I belive that if they are kept informed and told the truth then they will make up there own minds when they are ready about how they feel about their blended families. My girls know that they are safe and loved in our blended family and they also know that they are able to see their dad when he feels like it. Blended families can be a really great thing if the situations are handled properly.

I hope some of this is a help to people.