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I read so many articles on breast feeding that say breast is best when in some cases it really is not. This is my experience and I want to share it with you.
I was able to breast feed my beautiful boy with no problems at first. He took
to it well and enjoyed it. My friend on the other hand was unable to breast feed her son due to the fact that she was unable to hold him for over an hour after he was born because he had to be put in to intensive care to get his blood sugar levels right and then he just wouldn't attach at all to the breast so she had to get something into him and the nurses gave him formula. Everybody made her feel like she wasn't a very good mother because she wasn't breast feeding her son and she started to get depression from the constant comments about how her son was more likely to get sick because he wasnt breastfed and how they wouldn't share the bond that breastfeeding mothers and their babies enjoyed.
I was so angry with all these people including her own family that I told them what I thought of them and they said " its ok you breastfeed so you are a good mum"
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
After this I just kept reassuring her that she was agreat mum and her bond with her son was amazing and she shouldn't listen to them because they obviously didn't know what they were talking about.
When my son was two and a half months I had to formula feed him because he wasn't getting enough from my breast milk and was constantly hungary but according to all these "experts" it was ok because my son had some breast milk.
My friends son is very healthy and happy and his bond with his mum is really amazing it is beautiful to watch. My beautiful boy on the other hand has had ear infections and viral infections on and off his whole little life so where is the breast is best theory here.
This new mum was put down so much for not breastfeeding her child that she was becoming depressed and unhappy. She thought she was not doing what is best for her baby so she felt guilty all because of narrow mindedness. Please think about what you say to a mother who is unable to breast feed or even one who has chosen not to breast feed because you can really do some emotional damage with thoughtless words.
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Everyone is different. I have a friend that tried to breastfeed all 3 of her cildren but couldn't produce enough milk. The first one was begining to dehydrate before she realized there had to be a problem.
Your right, everyone is different. Doesn't matter if you breast feed or formula feed your baby, what matters is that your baby grows up healthy and strong. No one has the right to make anyone feel that way, because when you're in that situation you have enough on your mind then to have other people critisis you. We are all mums and dads, and we do our best for our kids, not matter what on-lookers think or say.
Thank you very much for this! The exact same thing happened to me and my son after he was born, except I didn't get to try to nurse him for over 24 hours. After that, he NEVER wanted to breastfeed, would immediatly fall asleep or screem at the breast, but took a bottle with no problem. I tried everything, and everyone said, "Just keep trying!" After about three weeks, we were both miserable. My son is now almost five weeks and I finally just decided to give him the bottle full time because I was losing my mind and getting really depressed. We are now a MUCH happier family! Your post helps me feel more secure in my decision and helps to relieve a little of the guilt. Thanks again!
Breast feeding is one method of feeding a human and it is the natural method created by years or evolution or God (lets just agree it just happens) however us clever humans have been able to devise other methods of feeding our humans. This is because we are clever and have developed a way to ensure better survival by developing alternative ways to increase our survival rate. If your breasts work fine and bubs takes food and nourishment via that method - fine. If things are not or do not work you need to find another way in order to ensure you baby is fed and grows and survives.
I saw a baby bat on TV last night and it was abandoned by its mother - breast feeding was not the best method for it as the breasts had flown away or died with the mother. Lucky for this bat us humans have developed other ways to feed animals so this bat was raised on bottles and now it has survived so it can feed and grow other bats.
Just like a river running to the sea. It probably runs best when it follows the path engraved in the land from many years or erosion but if a tree falls across the river this tried and true path may no longer be the best method of getting ti the sea. This is when a little stream will work its way around the tried and true method. As long as the water makes it to the sea. Thats all that matters.
Feed your babies as best you can. Feed and love em so they can do the same.
nobody should made to feel bad about there baby in anyway, as long as they are healthy and your both happy. Just be glad we have all options in this day and age to help, no matter what we decide!!!
Oh my goodness, finally someone who has the guts to come out and say it! I tried for 3 painful weeks to breastfeed my now 16 month old. As always the midwives, community nurses and even friends and family put the pressure on. I cried for days leading up to the decision to switch to bottle, and felt guilty for weeks after. Then out come from the woodwork, people who kept crapping on at me about how I should try to breastfeed, actually BOTTLEFED their 4 kids!
That rubbish about bottle fed babies being sick more often is also crap, my girl has only ever had 1 cold, and a girl I know who breastfed all her 3 kids, they are sick ALL the time! That stuff about skin to skin contact promoting milk production is also crap. I tried EVERYTHING to breastfeed and had NO milk.
I think this is something that isn't spoken about enough. It is amazing how many mothers I have spoken to who are overcome with guilt over not being able to breastfeed. That kind of self doubt can be so damaging to a mothers self esteem. A mother who is unable to breastfeed has enough guilt on board without being told the opinions of others. I breastfed and then bottlefed both my children and in the long run I think there are other more important aspects to a childs life. Love and nurturing being only two of them.
Wonderful to see a breastfeed mother stand up for formula feeders. There are a lot of reasons why some mothers can't breastfeed. A friend of mine became seriously ill while breastfeeding and needed an operation. Add in the medications she had to take afterwards were not safe for breastfeeding, but without them she could have died, and formula was her only option left. She also received a lot of critism about not breastfeeding her child, but she was quite able to stay calm and just briefly explain why she couldn't, and it was amazing how many people she left choking on their words.
i was never really able to b'feed charlie as my milk was making him sick, we were told by the doctors to stop b'feding and go onto bottle, charlie was in NICU and was tube feed for the first 8weeks of life and when he was able to take from me this is when he started to get sick, when i was going through this i was told by the b'feeding people the so called experts that i was giving up to easily and was told to keep going as it is what the baby wants and needs, and that it didn't matter if it was making him sick, i was then told yesterday by a doctor that we saw that the reason why charlie gets sick now is because he wasn't b'feed and that it is my fault and that i really should have thought about what i was doing to him at the time when i had to stop, i told him how i was told by other doctors at the time that were looking after him that i was making him sick, his response to this was THEY KNOW NOTHING and that they should have never told me to stop,
at the time i felt that there was no support for the mums out there that aren't able to b'feed and i feel that there should be more support and that they shouldn't be made feel as though they are letting their baby down by not b'feeding, as they have their own reasons why they can't and those reasons should never be questioned by anyone this is just my opinion and how i feel
Unfortunately, just like the rest of us, doctors have their own opinions. I had a child health nurse (the ONLY one in town) who was against breastfeeding. Maybe because she herself did not breastfeed and her daughters did not breastfeed. I'm not sure the reason. But she gave me lots of reasons why I should stop breastfeeding. I still to this day will see 3 different doctors about the same problem if it's a serious problem. One doctor diagnosed Hannah with an ear infection when she had pneumonia last year. I don't have a lot of faith in doctors so that's why I see more than one. Same with Centrelink, if I want to know something I will ring them 3 times in a row, getting a different person each time, and if they all say the same thing then great, if they all say different things then I will go in to centrelink and talk to the manager. That's only over big issues though. I know we all do what's best for our baby and when we're told things (particularly when we're still hormonal after giving birth) we tend to listen and do what is best at the time. That's all you can do. Don't feel bad about it now, you did what was best at the time. It's unfair for them to say that to you now too. And to blame you for a problem that's occurring. Tell them they are the doctors, they need to fix it, regardless of how it started or when it started!
I love reading your advice lexi! You are soo right on this.
I wasn't able to breast feed and I was happy with giving her formula. My baby turned out great, a devil LOL but she's just amamzing! I have never said to anyone that breast is best, I find that there are always reasons why people can't. Like me for example.
I was diagnosed with post-natal depression after my daughter was born but refused to accept advice to take medication because I thought her needs for breast milk were more important than my sanity. I breast fed her for eight months and became increasingly and qutie seriously ill. Eventually, I had to wean her and take the medication but I suffered alot during that eight month period. Frankly, I wouldn't make the same decision again. I know a lot of bottle fed babies. I was one. We're allright. Sometimes, breast is not best. Sorry.
This is exactly what I mean why should you have to apologize for your experience. This is what I wish I could stop. Mums who are bottle feeding feeling like they should apologize for doing what they feel is best for their baby. I congratulate you for bottle feeding your baby. I know that it puts less stress on a mother to bottle feed as when it all becomes to much formula can be a life saver for mum too.
there is no question that the breast milk is the best if for some reason it does not work out that is fine no need to make the mother feel bad about it.
I am a little touchy on the boob vs. bottle debate. I had my post on this the other day....hmmm and knowing me a few times, repeated and dragged through minti too...lol
I am sick of hearing breast milk is best as, like you have said, it isn't. The fact that so many minti members, those who have and those who didn't, agree is testimony to this.
People become so brain washed by this that they don't see past the nipple on their boob
I think if you have tried to breastfeed and problems happened that made it impossible to keep doing it then the mother has done the best for their baby. Even though Breast is Best if the mother has tried but not been able to for whatever reasons they are just doing what they need to do for their child to be healthy and thats what counts in the end. I am a breastfeeding mother but I had so much trouble at the start and at the time I didn't think I would get through that period but thankfully I did. My best friend tried her best to breastfed but it didn't work out and I know that she is an awesome mother.
I had the opposite I had every one telling me to just put him on the bottle when I had problems, thankfully I could work through the problems and came out to still be breastfeeding. I feel like no matter how you feed your baby/child there is always someone who is going to say you are doing the wrong thing. Thats why we need to support our friends in their motherhood no matter if we do things differently.
I agree completely. As parents we all try to do whats best for our bubs, whether that be through the bottle or the breast. Breastfeeding awareness is important, though. For some women problems arise due to a lack of confidence in breastmillk and their milk supply. There is lots of support available for women who want to continue breast feeding. I had lots of problems with feeding too and was using comps through the night and my supply got so low at one stage I was comping after every breastfeed. I perservered and to everyones surprise maintained exclusive breastfeeding.
Don't forget though that we should never judge other mums. We haven't walked in their shoes. The important thing is that we feed our babies.... irregardless of where it comes from
I found that when i was in hospital with my son that the midwives really pushed to have you breast feeding, I was unable to breast feed but was guilted into expressing my milk, this turned a 1 hour feeding time into a 2 hour eposide (1 hour feed, 1 hour expressing), for the first 9 weeks i would only get a max of 1 hour sleep at a time. In the end my milk dried up and i had to go to formula.
I think i would have enjoyed feeding my son a lot more if i wasnt guilted into the notion that breast is best.
i totally agree. my daughter wasn't breast fed, and she's so healthy, except for a little ear problem with wax, as she gets so much of it etc, but that's being sorted out as we speak, and my nephew was breast fed, and the only one that was out of all 4 of them ( i have a niece in there also ) and the one that was breast fed is the one who's constantly sick. It's really only the doc's etc who is saying that breast is best, but i've found that formula is becoming better than the breast.
i agree, with the new things coming out these days (foods, medicines, toxins...) in some cases, we could be doing more harm than good!
i couldn't breastfeed and im happy with formula !
i never heard people can make such a hurtful comment about not breastfeeding before this, ~nobody~ should tell you that you are a bad mother because you dont breastfeed, its your child and your choice xox
Any contributed content above is the subjective opinion of that member or external author, and not of Minti.com Pty Ltd. If you are searching for health related advice we strongly suggest you seek professional medical support. View our Terms of Service for more details.
(January 2007) (
so they can do the same.
channy xox
