Preparing for the worst

Are you one of those people that is just waiting for the other shoe to drop?  Waiting for a good thing to go bad?  I never thought of myself as this kind of person, but I had feelings just like this last night.  Derek and I went to visit the birth center where I plan to give birth to my second son (Nathan) in February.  Always behind the power curve, we realized that we were close to the end and had never visited the facility to see how everything works and to find out what will go down when I go into labor. 

There was an informational session last night and we were one of 10 couples there.  We took the tour and everyone got to ask questions.  As I sat there and listened to the midwife discuss "normal labor" and reasons for getting transferred to a hospital, I could feel fear creeping up.  What if my labor was as difficult as it was last time?  What if things went wrong?  What if the baby didn't turn in the right position?  It was then that I realized how negative I was being and how my negativity was making me feel. 

• Focus on the positives.  To date I have not had any complications with the baby I am carrying now.  According to the midwives, he is healthy, active, and is right on track for growth.  So am I, for that matter.  There is still time for the baby to turn the right way (and the wrong way, and then the right way again ).
  
• Bad thoughts don't make bad things happen.  Just because you are feeling negative or down and then something bad does happen, it doesn't mean that you "MADE" it happen.  If this were possible, then a lot of mean bosses would get hit by buses on the way to work in the morning.  If bad things do happen, you are entitled to be angry and frustrated.  Never let someone invalidate you experiences or emotions. 
  
• Release the negative.  Sometimes we get overwhelmed and that's OK.  But getting stuck in it is dangerous for your mental health.  If you feel like you are always caught in the negative, find someone to talk to or seek professional advice. 

While I do not believe that personal negativity brings about "bad" things, I do think that your mental and physical health can suffer from too much worrying.  These are just some things I am working on for me.  I hope they can help you too.