Cots After Co-Sleeping

Hello everyone and happy New Year

I have a 14 months old daughter, Anna. She is my only child.

Since the day she was born she always slept next to me in our bedroom (my husband was always against the idea as she has a bedroom). I

selfishly needed to see her and touch her at all time.

I returned to work 4 months ago (full time 10- 12 hours /day), she was a bit unsettled by my absence so I took her into our bed to comfort her and now she refuses to go back to her cot next our bed. When I put her in the cot, she will scream until she is back in our bed. She wakes up 3-4 times every night and wants to be breast feed or play.

The situation is getting difficult, I have go to bed at 8:30 every night in order to get few hour sleep before she wakes up. My husband is feeling neglected, felt out and is kicked out of his bed most nights and he served her with an eviction notice and she refuses to leave.

I believe it is time for her to move into her own bedroom and sleep through the night but so far we have fail.

PLEASE HEPL

I will go through the method I used.

My eldest Jaidan, who is now almost 3, slept in my bed from birth till he was 15 months old.

When I was about to pop with the second I chose to get him into his own bed.

And yes it took almost a month. It wasn't pleasent. BUT it worked.

I would put him in his cot at 7pm everynight. Close the door then sit next to the cot and completely ignore him. He would scream and cry and yell for a good hour. It was hard sitting there listening to that and not being able to comfort but the whole point of the excersise is
For him to learn that he isn't going to get what he wants no matter how loud and long he cried and screamed.
For him to realise that I was not going away and see that it's not that scary.

Then slowly I would move away from the cot. Day by day I would move 30cm or so away. Enough that I could see the door getting closer but he didn't realise I was moving away.

By the time you reach the door, most kids will have stopped having a fit when they go to bed and start sleeping. . . MOST!

Mine NO WAY!

So then I moved out of the room. By this stage it had been 2 weeks.

So next I tried controlled crying. I would put him in bed and leave him for 5 minutes. Go it. Sooth by WORDS and NOT pick him up. We dont want them to think that when they cry we will pick them up as it will cause other problems. I would spent a max of 2 minutes in the room.

Then I would leave. He would cry again. I would leave it a little longer this time. Maybe 7 minutes. YES it IS hard listening to them cry out for you but it worked.

Eventually they will go to bed. This took a week for me and I wish I had of used this to begin with. Now he goes to bed happily. Loves his bed. No permanant damage there

My sister however had great luck with the first method.

I say try them all. It's so important that they DO sleep in their own bed. That you and your hubby can spend those special nights together. That your bed becomes YOUR retreat.

Needless to say I DID NOT co-sleep with my second. COT COT COT all the way.