Part 3.... Tantrums, rages and meltdowns for your special needs child.... The recovery stage

The final stage......Recovery

After your child has pulled themself out of the rage cycle they enter the recovery stage .if you are blessed your child may apologise and act sorry for their behaviour...they may not remember their meltdown at all (my son often has no idea what he did or said when he has gone into a full meltdown)

Your child may need to sleep and is very fragile ....They may also take the old familiar route of Deny! Deny!Deny!...  ...if you don't allow them to calm down quietly after a rage then you may find they go right back to the rumbling stage for a very short time  and then right into a full blown rage again.....

This is not a teachable stage and you cant tell them at this time what behaviour is appropriate..They are still not able to understand...Let your child have space, but stay close in case they need you..Sometimes they just need to feel that an adult is present or close for their own peace of mind........Don't try and discuss the behaviour with them right now either....

The best way to help your child right now is to observe the following

• Do allow your child to sleep if they wish too (Master 5 can sometimes crash for a 2 to 3 hr nap after a full blown rage cycle and then he wakes up and he is a different kid)
  
• Redirect them to a special interest
• dont make any excess demands on your child
  

You as the parent also need to at this stage have time to rest and recover too..You have been through the ordeal right along side your child,.,. If its impossible at that time for you to rest then make sure at some point you take a bath or regroup..You need to be at your personal best to best help your child...I think of this as being like a mini cyclone going through our house.... when it happens you need to take the time to repair, regroup and rebuild before you can even think of being a help to those around you......

how do we prevent Rage cycles from occuring?

• we need to learn to recognise the behaviours that pre-empt a rage in our child and intervene quickly before it happens
  
• we need to teach our child to understand their environment and themselves
• your child needs you to help them discover what behaviour causes their rage cycle..and how to calm themselves when they feel it begin
  

After your child has got past  the recovery stage then you can take the time to discuss how they may better handle the situation in the future...This may take alot of time and effort (you will need to revise revise revise) but in the end it will mean that they will develop the ability to stay in control.....and your home life will become a much happier one....