This will only be a short bit of advice - and it is about what and how we say things to people.

We do have to be very careful how we tell children things, or even how we tell other adults if the children could possibly hear the conversation.  Children do not have the necessary life skills to understand the context or the exact meaning of what we say.  An example of this is my daughter:  I always told people that we only planned on having 2 children and that she was an accident.  Adults who knew us understood that that did not mean that she was not wanted or loved, it only meant that she wasn't planned.  She, on the other hand, thought that we did not want her because she was an accident!  I only discovered this one day when we were having one of our heart to hearts - which thankfully we were able to have in spite of what she thought!

I was devastated that I had led her to believe that and have since gone to great lengths to make her understand the difference and that she was very special because she wasn't expected.  She was like a bonus.  Thankfully I could clear that up, but what if I never found out what she thought?

The next bit of advice is our tone of voice.  I have a huge problem, because whenever I get serious and want to put my point across, it always sounds as if I am angry when really I am not.  I have real trouble understanding how to change the way I say things, because this too has upset my daughter more than once!  The boys never really commented on it, but she does frequently.  Part of me thinks that by now she really should know me well enough to understand that, but I still have some way to go in changing how I speak.  Partly it is a cultural thing I think.

Body language is also far more important than what we actually say.  The actual words spoken account for only about 10% of the communication methods that we use.  You can say the nicest thing, but in such a way that people will be in no doubt that you are mad at them or are mocking them or what ever.

Words, are not always what they seem.  More often than not, it is the attitude and the behaviour  that is used at the same time that say what one really wants to convey.

Show them you love them as well as telling them!  It is the showing that will have the greater effect, although they do need to hear it frequently!