Kids Arguements...Should you get involed?

Michalea told me a couple of days ago that one of the girls that has been calling her and a few other girls in the school fat and ugly had been ousted by a large group of her friends and they were making a stand and not having anything to do with this girl...Michaela was a little concerned that this girl would be hurt and lonely as she too had been on the recieving end of the sending someone to coventry (which is what it was called when we were at school) Michaela had had a hard time and this girl had gone around telling lies about her and she had ended up with only one friend...Now this girl has been found out about all the lies she has said and the kids have chosen to not be her friend and told her why....

Well last night I had a call from this girls mum...Asking me if I could talk to Michaela to try and get the girls to accept her back into the group...my feelings were torn between the young girl feeling the way I knew she would be and the fact that the other girls involved had made a stand and weeded out a person who was causing a huge amount of problems in the past year...So this is the way I decided to handle this...

I told the mother I would talk to Michaela and remind her of what I think friendship is all about...I also asked her the reasons that her and her friends had done what they had done with this girl so that I knew they were not doing something un necessary...I also told her of forgiving but let her know that was just my thoughts and in the end she had to make a decsion that was right for her...

Her reply to me was a friend to her was someone who was there for her when she needed them and would come to her when they needed her...She also said NO MATTER what mum friends do not lie about you to make you feel the way she did to all of us at some stage...She said that the group of girls had chosen to not be friends with her for a short period of time to teach her a lesson and to show her that they were not going to put up with her hurtful behaviour...

Okay maybe I do feel sorry for this other girl and maybe a little for the mum as I know what she is going through...BUT I am refusing to get involved...I didn't get involved when it was happening to my daughter so I want my daughter to have the ability to make choices of who she wants to be friends with and have the ability to identify a good friendship...

My advice to you...Stay out of your kids fights and arguments as much as possible...Let them deal with it on their own...I am not saying if things get out of hand not to do anything but if there is just ignoring involved then let it go...STAY OUT...Let them sort it out for themselves and let them learn another life lesson...How to deal with other people in the big wide world...

Sometimes these things work themselves out and sometimes they don't...You will be suprised how well kids can work things out on their own...

Just wanted to share...
Have a great day
Cheers
Angie