minti, powered by parents Powered by Parents
First Visit?     Register     Login
 

This site gets better with user participation. Please participate... Some of the main things you can do is rate this advice, add comments to this advice, add links to and from this advice, and/or write your own advice.

  email  print
  report   
Like this topic?
Write Advice
Add to Favorites
Advice that links to this one
ADVICE RATING
 (Highly recommend) (Highly recommend) (Highly recommend) (Highly recommend) (Highly recommend) 4.97 (Highly recommend) from 18 votes (491 Visits)

Living with my parents as alcoholics .

emmie by emmie Talking Back(July 2007) (rank 26th)

For as long as i can remember my mum has always been a drinker even when i was small we used to meet dad at busstop after he finnished work then mum would just dissapear to the pub and dad would play with us till bedtime up untill i was

5 and my dad left i was heart broken as i was daddys girlbut every time i said i missed him mum would say well where is he ????

Just a fewdays later bob from 2 doors away was constantly coming round and wanted to play with us all the time , before long he was living with us taking my dads place well a few days later my dad ccalled i wasnt allowed to tell him about bob so obviously as a child i never , but i did tell him they are always drinking beer so then our 2 days to dads turned into 2 months then the police were at the door u have to take ur children home or we will and you will be arrested for kidnapp so obviouly he had to bring us home and that was the last time i saw him until i was 18 yrs old.

We came home mum gave usa box of sweets and sat there telling us how dad doesent love us and we wont be seeing him again he will be going to prison , but i knew daddy did love me ok she never wentto the pubbut her and bob were falling all over the place drunk , it used to scare us and every time she got drunk she got angry much quicker and it wasnt long before bob was allowed to punnish and smack us that was always mums job this mum i came home to wasnt the same as to when i left and she kept referring to my dad as whale meat soon after i had to call bob dad i asbsolutly hated him he wasnt my dad  my answer to this was but i have a dad and hje said yes im here i was confussed

Then i had to grow up quick before i knew it they were getting married , they changed my name , then i had my step sister baby sitting while they were in the pub gettting drunk having a good time if we needed them quick they were in the pub bedtime they would come home shouting and falling everywhere things would get smashed sometimes mum would cry too me and my sister would be so scared we would reach over each others beds and hold hands and were so quiet .

We grew up fast we did as we pleased we spent alott of time in a friends over the road whos mum was always there and we always went along when they went out for the day to their nans which was better than being round them either drunk or asleep cos their drunk and the key was always in the door if we wanted to go home then we got to about 10 and if we did the slightest wrong he would hit us with his belt he used this as a weapon to his behaviour and mum just let it happen she never cared less , so the more this was happening the more i was rebelling the more i hated him the more inever wanted tobe there so at the age of 13 i startedrunning away from home i thought they would not care as long as they have some beer and a bottle of vodka they wont realise im gone and after a day they would call the police after about 50 times of them picking me up they thoughtsomething was happening at homethis is not just for attention as my mother has been saying so the police interviewed my mumand she said everything was fin at home .

Oh dont i wish i never said that apparantly my mum never knew but he starting raping both me and my sister and he would even tape it on his camcorda sick man he is the arrests were increasing untill i finally said to the officer that picked me up dont take me home then obviously the officer wanted to know why i showed him my arms i had cuts covered in 1 arm the other half cut he asked what happened i said i cut them obviously he then said he needed to take me to the station i agreed he explained i was not under arrest , there i was asked why i did all these cuts so i said i do it when mum and bob get drunk and fight and when im naughty he hits me with a belt and i also said he offered me 50 cigerettes for a blow job i was so scared i could say no more they sent a pychiatrist to talk with me and was diagnosed with depression which got worse and turnt into manic depression i went into foster care my sister was questioned and she denied everything my mum never spoke rto me for months but when she finally did she told me how much she  loved me and how it would never happen again

I moved home thinking things would change just wanting to be with my sistersbut it just got much mucvh worse right up untill i was 18 i put up with it , my step sister turnt to heroin so she was hated too in the end she lost her life to it and its all down to 2 alcoholics who cant look after their children after that i was living alone anyway kellie was dead i had to tell the poice everything so i did he was not prosecuted as the rapes were no longer on the camcorda ive not seen my family from that day and wish never to ever again

Alcoholics dont ccare who they hurt or what they do all they see is the alcohol runnig out .

thanks

Any contributed content above is the subjective opinion of that member or external author, and not of Minti.com Pty Ltd. If you are searching for health related advice we strongly suggest you seek professional medical support. View our Terms of Service for more details.
ADVICE RATING
 (Highly recommend) (Highly recommend) (Highly recommend) (Highly recommend) (Highly recommend) 4.97 (Highly recommend) from 18 votes
Report
ExcellentExcellentExcellentExcellentExcellent
GoodGoodGoodGoodGood
AverageAverageAverageAverageAverage
PoorPoorPoorPoorPoor
Very PoorVery PoorVery PoorVery PoorVery Poor

Voting help


 
Add a comment on this article.

 

emmie
November 2007 | emmie
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .
thats the picture dont know where it went


Reply Reply Report
emmie
November 2007 | emmie
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .

Alcohol isnt a nice thing , and as muchhas i loved her i had to do what was best for me and when things dont go their way i was to blame but then i relised

andit never will be expectable and i was fed up of being hurt sometimes i sit here and think how did i actually survive ? but i did the truth had to be out i had to stop the pain this was the only way yes i losteverything i had in the process but im still here and i dont need them neither do my kids i sometimes worry i will pick up their traits but i will do anything i possibly can to protect my kids from stuff like this they are too precious and i love them i was always tiold the reason i dont have a midddler name and my sister does is because she never really wanted me but i am better than them and once they have drank themself to death i will be happy that sounds cruel but they ruined my life

cheers

emz



Reply Reply Report
nome
5.00 (Excellent) | November 2007 | nome
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .

Congrats to you for wanting something better.

 My mother to this day is an alcoholic while i was never molested  (she could never hold down a relationship) she was an angry drunk who was depressed and even while  sober would belt us and tell us how she wished she were never born. She would leave us alone starting at the age of five. I dont wish to complain but just to say that it takes great courage and strength to change how you raise your children. ( i dont drink more than two on any one occassion and i NEVER get drunk. If im in a bad mood i watch myself so a learnt behaviour doesnot come out.  I try using other methods than smacking

The most common behaviours are a learned behaviuor some things go from Generation to Generation. I hope to stop a few bad family traits in my family and leave them behind in my generation. I dont want to pass these things on to my kids.

Hope your life is coming together. I support you in not having contact with your mother.



Reply Reply Report
emmie
August 2007 | emmie
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .
i think this is 1 i had to write cheers lexi xx


Reply Reply Report
lexiw
5.00 (Excellent) | August 2007 | lexiw
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .

Hugs and kisses for you Thank you for sharing you story

 Lexi xxx



Reply Reply Report
bittenbythelovebug
5.00 (Excellent) | July 2007 | bittenbythelovebug
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .

Oh, emmie. I have to say...what an amazing person you are...to have got through all this. And with so much love in your heart! Thank you for sharing. Big hugs & Kisses XXOO, Tracey



Reply Reply Report
      emmie
5.00 (Excellent) | July 2007 | emmie
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .
thank you so much hunni x


Reply Reply Report
Pumpkinbum
5.00 (Excellent) | July 2007 | Pumpkinbum
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .
This is the biggest fear of mine, gong back to my ex and finding him relapsing onto the drugs, i want ot make sure the boys aren't crushed of this happens again, which is why we are taking things slow


Reply Reply Report
      emmie
5.00 (Excellent) | July 2007 | emmie
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .
You have to be so careful as to who you trust around your kids i live upon trust and make sure no harm come to my family and this is also the reason i dont drink i have seen what happens to people that drink alot


Reply Reply Report
           Pumpkinbum
5.00 (Excellent) | July 2007 | Pumpkinbum
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .
Trust is a big thing for me too, that is why even though i can see he has changed dramatically, i need to be 110% sure he is clean before commiting. Children learn most of their experiences from parents i want my boys to learn the best.


Reply Reply Report
                emmie
July 2007 | emmie
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .
i totally agree good luck with it thanks .


Reply Reply Report
anon
5.00 (Excellent) | July 2007 | anon
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .
I have told you once I think it's great you were able to share your story with every one and I am telling you again. The more these stories are heard about the more that can be done to protect our own children. Good to see that you have made a happy and safe family enviroment for yourself and your kids. Thanks again and if you ever want to talk you know you have all your minti friends here who love you dearly.


Reply Reply Report
      emmie
July 2007 | emmie
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .
thanks hunni i totally agree


Reply Reply Report
hermy
5.00 (Excellent) | July 2007 | hermy
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .
i am so sorry you had to go through this......but i can say i am glad that you turned out alright......thanks for sharing your story and i hope it has helped......know that we love you and are always here for you......regards Sandra xxx


Reply Reply Report
      emmie
July 2007 | emmie
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .
cheers sandra x


Reply Reply Report
emmie
5.00 (Excellent) | July 2007 | emmie
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .
cheers hunni  i must admit it made me feel a bit better agfter ward and i also think it is good for parents to hear what does happen to kids thans x


Reply Reply Report
cazza
5.00 (Excellent) | July 2007 | cazza
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .
Thank you emmie for sharing this with us, and hope it has helped you in a way for writing it all down on how you feel about these people that call themselves your parents... I recently wrote my background on here as well, and after wards it was a huge weight of me, so hope you feel better as well for sharing this with us..

Us mums that were abused as children are better then our parents and stronger, and we need to show everyone that we aint like them, and our children will be better off as well...


Reply Reply Report
llmunchkin
5.00 (Excellent) | July 2007 | llmunchkin
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .
Thank goodness you had the presence of mind to keep running away.  It is unbelievable that the authorities took so long to catch on, and what about the rest of your local community?  Surely other adults must have known that they were dodgy!  I guess this terrible experience that nobody should ever have to endure has helped shape you into the beautiful, caring mother that you are today.

(I am sure you must be adopted - that woman can't possibly be your genetic mother!).


Reply Reply Report
      emmie
5.00 (Excellent) | July 2007 | emmie
Re: Living with my parents as alcoholics .

they were alwaysd nice around people so they thought they were good parents little did they know , i too think i was adopted surely i never came out of that but 1 thing is 4 sure if any of my kids told me they were being hurt i would believe them

thanx hunni x



Reply Reply Report

Related Content

Add

No related content has been added

Related Tags

Add

None

Bookmarks

No bookmarks found

Know someone who would like this site? Refer a friend