Digital Revolution: How You Can Leverage Your Kids Interest in Tech to Improve Communication

My daughter is only nine, but already I'm beginning to see some unsavory tweenager behaviors.  You know which ones I mean--the eye roll, the grunt, the sarcastic response.  I'm convinced Madeleine isn't trying to torture me as much as she is trying out "older" behaviors for affect.  I have strategies for this kind of thing; I know how to get things back on track.  Still, I get worn out when our interactions focus on HOW we talk to each other instead of the conversation itself.

I'm discovering that now is the perfect time to introduce Madeleine to some other forms of communication.  She enjoys feeling grownup as well as savvy about what's the latest and greatest in the digital revolution.  We're having really fun conversations where tone of voice simply can't get in the way, and she's loving it!

Here's a list of our mediums of choice and how we're using them to our shared advantage:

• Chat.  My husband installed Jabber for Madeleine, making sure to put all parental controls in place, so she needs mom or dad approval before talking to a new buddy.  So far, we are the only buddies on the list, so her motivation to communicate with the 'rents is high!
  
• Email.  We initially set Madeleine up on aol.com through their portal Kol.com (kids at AOL), but Madeleine became quickly frustrated by spotty service.  We weren't that thrilled with the way AOL was marketing to kids either.  Dave set her up with a gmail account, but kept her password underwraps.  This way we know when she is on, we can scan for unsavory spam and also see what's in her inbox.  At age nine, these feel like reasonable controls to keep her safe.
  
• Text.  Madeleine doesn't have a cell phone (yet), but she enjoys sending a text for me when I need to send a quick message to a friend about when and where we're meeting or who needs to bring what home for dinner.  In another year or so, we'll investigate cell phone programs that let kids stay in touch with parents with a limited calling list.

How do you feel about letting your kids use technology?  Has opening the floodgates on this one hurt or helped your family communication?   Comments open below.