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How Self-Esteem Affirmations Build Character in Your Kids

JeanTracy by JeanTracy Talking Back(December 2007) (rank 44th)

Is your child’s self-esteem low? Are other kids’ opinions of him more important than his own? Is he afraid to try new things? Inside you’ll find my personal story and how self-esteem affirmations can build character in your child.

How Lack of Confidence Fractured My Ribs:

I started skiing in my 40’s. Whenever I looked down from the snow-covered hilltops, my eyes widened. My heart pounded, and my knees turned to jelly. On one downhill run, my fear sent me crashing and I fractured my ribs.

I knew I had to get over my fear because I wanted to ski with my family. Being a child/family counselor, naturally I turned to affirmations. With the next ski trip I told myself, ‘I can and I am.’ Then I pushed off into a great downhill ride.

Can you see what I did? When I felt controlled from the outside, I worried about the steepness of the hill, the recklessness of skiers nearby skiers, and my own abilities to make it to the bottom in one piece. With those thoughts I fractured my ribs.

Self-Esteem Affirmations - How Inner Control Increased My Success:

I couldn’t let these fears control me. I needed inner control. Affirmations were the answer. At home I visualized the ski slope. I felt the good feeling of swishing down the hillside and I told myself, “I can and I am.” I was changing my outer control to inner control. My next ski runs were a breeze. The affirmation worked for me on the ski slopes and this process can work for you and your children too.

Building Character and Reaching Goals:

Don’t let your kids be controlled by other kids’ ridicule, opinions, or snubs. Don’t let your kids be ruled by fear of trying new opportunities. Don’t let your child hear put-downs from you.

Teach your children to switch from outer control to inner control. Teach your children to see, sense, and say their goals. Ask them questions. Probe them for their negative thoughts. Guide them to positive pictures, words, and feelings. They’ll reach their goals and build character too.

Resource Box_____________________________________________________________________________

If you liked these tips, choose the Parent Affirmation Kit and the Goal-Setting Kit at Parenting Resources http://www.kidsdiscuss.com/parent_resource_center.asp Jean Tracy, MSS publishes a Free Parenting Newsletter at http://www.KidsDiscuss.com Subscribe and receive 80 fun activities to share with your kids. Sign up for Jean’s free Parenting Skills Blog and receive two Free Parenting Tips each week. Subscribe at http://parentingskillsblog.typepad.com 
Any contributed content above is the subjective opinion of that member or external author, and not of Minti.com Pty Ltd. If you are searching for health related advice we strongly suggest you seek professional medical support. View our Terms of Service for more details.

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ADVICE RATING
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Izzy
December 2007 | Izzy
Re: How Self-Esteem Affirmations Build Character in Your Kids

After reading your advice, an incident a couple of days ago came to mind. While driving back home from the inlaws (after spending Christmas there) we stopped by at McD's to use the restroom and buy lunch. My almost 3 year old son was fascinated by the toys (dolls and robots) on display and was commenting on the dolls. I asked him which toy he wanted and he said he wanted the doll.  So after getting his "boy" toy, I took it out of the box and asked right away if I could exchange it for a doll. I got a weird look, but I didn't care.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with him wanting to see and play with the doll and I am sure as heck not going to make him uncomfortable.  : -) 

I did have to give the hubby a heads up though and told him that I got the doll on purpose.



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      JeanTracy
December 2007 | JeanTracy
Re: How Self-Esteem Affirmations Build Character in Your Kids

Dear Izzy,

Good for you Izzy! I care for my 3 year old grandson and would have done the same thing. Who cares what people think. Also, I salute your assertiveness.

With warm wishes for a wonderful New Year,

Jean



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angieh
December 2007 | angieh
Re: How Self-Esteem Affirmations Build Character in Your Kids
I agree, most things are just in the mind as we tend to limit ourselves like we can't do ___ but really, we can do it if we put our minds to it.


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      JeanTracy
December 2007 | JeanTracy
Re: How Self-Esteem Affirmations Build Character in Your Kids

Dear Angieh,

It looks like we agree. Thank you for your comments.

Warmly,

Jean



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jenlemen
December 2007 | jenlemen
Re: How Self-Esteem Affirmations Build Character in Your Kids
big fan of affirmations here.  they help me everytime.


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      JeanTracy
December 2007 | JeanTracy
Re: How Self-Esteem Affirmations Build Character in Your Kids

Dear Jenlemen,

I'd love to hear your stories about your success with affirmations. It's great to hear that you use them and they work for you. Go mind power!

Warmly,

Jean



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cazza
December 2007 | cazza
Re: How Self-Esteem Affirmations Build Character in Your Kids
Great advice and it amazes me how i can teach my children all that you have advised here, as i dont want them to make the same mistakes as i did as  a kid,.,,,

But i wont put my children down, as i dont like being put Down.. So i feel you need to treat your children the way you want to be treated.

xxxx cazza


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      JeanTracy
December 2007 | JeanTracy
Re: How Self-Esteem Affirmations Build Character in Your Kids

Dear Cazza,

I think many of us have heard about the importance of self-talk, affirmations, and self-esteem. The problem is - we just don't know how to put it altogether. It's easy when we learn how. What a great gift to give our children this tool. They can use it for life.

I admire you for not putting your chldren down. You know how to live the Golden Rule, Cazza.

Warmly,

Jean



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cassaustin
December 2007 | cassaustin
Re: How Self-Esteem Affirmations Build Character in Your Kids
Great advice.


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      JeanTracy
December 2007 | JeanTracy
Re: How Self-Esteem Affirmations Build Character in Your Kids

Thank you for your comment. I appreciate you thoughtfulness in writing to me.

Warmly,

Jean



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emmie
December 2007 | emmie
Re: How Self-Esteem Affirmations Build Character in Your Kids

Brilliant advice

Thanks for sharing

Luv Emz xx



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      JeanTracy
December 2007 | JeanTracy
Re: How Self-Esteem Affirmations Build Character in Your Kids

Dear Emz,

Again, I love hearing from you and appreciate your support.

Warmly,

Jean



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